Kids abandoned downstairs

[Heartofstrings]

I feel really so rough. Husband is away taking exams.
Bloated- so so sore
Abdo pain
Back ache
Fatigue
Muscle aches

I just can't be arsed. I've never been Bloated I'm my life until this week and now it's almost constant. A couple of weeks ago I was tested for thyroid issues as my periods are messed up and the tiredness and aching.

The kids pop up to say hi every so often and I've just chucked cereal at them. Please tell me this is ok? I have no local family

@mozerella I absolutely disagree, cooking together is a fantastic way fir pre schoolers to learn all sorts of fine motor skills, understand maths and counting, use extended language, observe reading in practice, the list is endless

There are very good, and quite specific reasons, why Montessori valued independence so strongly for the children in her care.

As for why a preschooler should know how to make lasagne/cut up veg or fruit/dress him or herself/make toast & scrambled eggs/fetch water or a snack/handle ‘grown-up’ tasks happily and confidently, sure, they don’t need to know it but there’s no harm at all in them doing so, and potentially quite a lot of positives.

I actually also think that unsupervised time for kids kids good for them. Perhaps not six months ago, but now, yes. The eldest has just gone upstairs- I can hear him. The youngest has gone outside- I can see him

Unsupervised play is good for them. Leaving them unsupervised is neglectful.

[quote Passthepepper]@mozerella I absolutely disagree, cooking together is a fantastic way fir pre schoolers to learn all sorts of fine motor skills, understand maths and counting, use extended language, observe reading in practice, the list is endless[/quote]
We'll agree to disagree then. My 12 and 17 yr old DS can cook decent meals independently. They're very good at maths (17yr old doing maths A level) They have excellent fine and gross motor skills (regularly go mountain biking, skateboarding and more). They acquired these skills when they were ready and with my full support. When they were 3, guess what, they played. All the time. Which is also excellent for learning and developing in every single way that they need to. I did the cooking because I'm the adult.

Yep. Would you believe. True story. We've been doing occupational therapy with him. He's doing doing absolutely amazingly. He's now fully dry, sleeps through the night and is no longer violent

Unsupervised is just dangerous. Sorry spin it anyway you want to justify it. I wouldn’t risk it because the regret when something goes wrong ... well.
My dc are Montessori and similar age and need support and supervision still

Maybe I use the word unsupervised incorrectly. I could unsupervised as within ear shot but not interfering with them. Knowing what they are doing but them thinking they are alone

Op
You are feeling better
Hide the thread if I were you!

@Heartofstrings

Yep. Would you believe. True story. We've been doing occupational therapy with him. He's doing doing absolutely amazingly. He's now fully dry, sleeps through the night and is no longer violent

No dont belive it. Occupational therapy wouldn't have changed his behaviour so drastically that a few months that a 4 year old can now be left unsupervised to let himself out the house safely with a younger sibling plus do all the other things you claim . No not buying it.

I'm quite enjoying the bun fight. I'm secure in my own parenting. I'm generally a bit unschooly and so just teach my kids things when they express an interest.

Within earshot just isn’t safe enough. Sorry but it’s that simple.

You cannot know what they are doing by ear shot when they are that young. If a nursery left children in a room without any adult, for any reason, they’d be closed down by Ofsted. There’s a reason for that!

He's always been able to cook and run baths and stuff. Can he build a brio train track? No. Can he manage a supermarket? Not always. Can he make a decent sandwich and chop some cucumber? Yes. Although he will also half a pot of hummus in the process.

The OT is actually working on something called retained primitive reflexes. It's actually been transformative. It's incredible

@mozerella I love a bit of competitive parenting, so I’ll raise you my 4 adult children, who all incidentally have Firsts, full time jobs and have all at various times lived independently overseas, were all cooking with me as preschoolers and perfectly capable of using appropriate knives, chopping, measuring and mixing, whilst chatting and thinking.
I must say though none of mine can skate board to save their life, so you’ve beaten me there

He's 4. He hasn't always been able to cook and run baths

My 4 year old can tell you about gravity, carbon dioxide and enjoys listening to his heart using daddy's stethoscope but will he sit and colour between the lines? Like heck will he

You’re so secure in your parenting that you had to come on MN despite feeling poorly and ask us all of it’s ok for you to ‘abandon’ your kids downstairs?

Right.

Get some painkillers and get on with parenting.

@Plumbear2 no. He learned during the first covid lockdown

Plus he might be able to turn a tap on. That's very different to safely running a bath and checking the temp.

Sorry what - did I read correctly that this 4 year old with severe issues half a year ago “has always” been able to cook?

@Heartofstrings to be fair one if my favourite memories was coming into the kitchen to find my then 2 year old making a sandwich with what she thought was a slice of cheese but she’d sliced off some dripping fat instead! Boak! I didn’t let her eat it.

I kind of actually wanted reassurance about my medical symptoms

Half a year ago he could cook. He has ways been good when channeled. Unfortunately he just also used to throw things and hit

I would try buscopan for the bloating, peppermint is also good. Give it a few days and take it from there. I've ended up at A and E a couple of times from IBS pain/bloating.

The bloating from Ovarian cancer is due to fluid not gas and your GP should be able to tell the difference but if in any doubt push for a CA124l5 blood test and an ultrasound