Friends sarcy remarks about the way I dress

[LoveHeart929w]

So i'm 25 and I have 2 close friends.

I'm 5'1 and weigh 7 stone 5 and I have always been quite conscious about my height. I love heels (but moderate heels like heeled boots, wedges, sandals) and I also love dresses. It's my style.

Anyway, not all the time but sometimes my friend's make comments about my clothes that make me feel awkward.

We went for a meal the other day and I wore black jeans with a nice black top and my pale pink heels (probably about 3 inches).
Friend's were in flats and jeans. As we were leaving the restaurant, my friend made a comment about " how do you walk in those heels?" to which I said "easy, you get used to heels".

And as I got in my car and they walked towards there cars together, I heard them still talking about my heels and how it's "typical me" to be wearing them.

It's also been hot the past 2 weeks and last week we met up for a walk. They both were in leggings or jeans and a tshirt, I wore some black shorts with a pink off the shoulder top and white trainers.
It then resulted in a discussion about "I can't believe you're wearing shorts, are you not cold?"
Bear in mind, it was boiling!

I just feel constantly put down. I don't care what other people wear but i'm getting tired of there little snide remarks.
Maybe i'm being over the top but I just want to wear what I want without being interrogated.

Yep sod them! I'm sure it's jealousy and you sound a healthy weight. I grew up being ridiculed for my looks and felt really down and that I missed out on the teenage experimental clothing thing as I would always hide under big clothes.

Carry on as you are and put it down to them being dicks

[quote astonafar]@LoveHeart929w most people want to look good. But there does come a point where it takes too much importance.[/quote]
Wearing nice clothes when you're 25 and socialising frequently?

Don't whatever you do visit the style and beauty board, I don't even want to know what you think about botox and fillers.

jealous of your slim figure is my bet

This is getting weird now, fantasising about the poster's 'cracking legs'.

Jealously at it's finest. They've came out and feel frumpy compared to you. These kinds of remarks have something much bigger behind it and says more about them than you.
They've no doubt made so many rude comments towards you about your dress sense they feel they need to be dedicated to the dressing down cause and are now stuck in a rut.

Why are women expected to put up with negative crap from other women? If it was the OPs husband or male friend sneering at her clothes you’d all be up in arms but apparently op is a sensitive little snowflake for being fed up with women being rude to her.

@ThrobbingToothacheOfTheMind

Why are women expected to put up with negative crap from other women? If it was the OPs husband or male friend sneering at her clothes you’d all be up in arms but apparently op is a sensitive little snowflake for being fed up with women being rude to her.

This.

@Anotheruser02 I socialise frequently. But yes I think it is not healthy to be too focused on your appearance.

Wearing nice clothes that suit you is just that. Maintaining a low weight is just that especially when you're petite the odd pound would be very noticable.

That's not too focused it's normal especially at 25.

@Anotheruser02 No if you are focused on whether you put on one pound, that is too focused on weight and not healthy.

@ThatsSoFetch I love this! You sound lovely!

@Anotheruser02

Wearing nice clothes that suit you is just that. Maintaining a low weight is just that especially when you're petite the odd pound would be very noticable. That's not too focused it's normal especially at 25.

No one should have to justify how they dress or what weight they're comfortable with. This is an example of women picking holes in other women, aiming to put down and not supporting.

Friends shouldn't be making rude/passive aggressive comments based on appearances. I couldn't imagine doing that to someone while we were out to enjoy each others company, making them feel insecure.

@ThrobbingToothacheOfTheMind

Why are women expected to put up with negative crap from other women? If it was the OPs husband or male friend sneering at her clothes you’d all be up in arms but apparently op is a sensitive little snowflake for being fed up with women being rude to her.

Exactly. If it comes from another woman it's out of the realms of possibility that she's jealous and manipulative?

If it were a man he would be jealous of attention from other men, be controlling, manipulating and she would be in an abusive relationship that requires a divorce. However, women aren't capable of these behaviours 🙄

I used to wear heels all the time but too fat to wear them now.
I'd love to be this thin again and wear these!

Comment on the running commentary from them and smile.
Some people like to point out everything and anything different to them, its pointless and irritating.

These sound like normal and inoffensive comments that friends might make.

Honestly I agree with PPs that heels aren't really 'in' anymore - I never see people wearing heels these days, always things like trainers and DMs, so maybe youe friends comment as it's unusual for people to wear them.

I don't mean this in a horrible way, but the things your friends said really sound like no big deal but I get the feeling you posted this because you want everyone to tell you they're jealous of you (not sure why else you included your weight)

You are slim be prepared for negative comments for the rest of your life if you remain slim. I’m in the same boat. I’m the biggest I have ever been as well in to middle age now but still much slimmer than most in my age group.

Some “friends”! I would play them at their own game.

I would be so tempted to turn up next time in a sheer top without a bra or something equally outrageous!

@Posieandpip How unkind are you?!

Ignore that nonsense OP, wear what you like.

[quote Misty84]@Posieandpip How unkind are you?!

Ignore that nonsense OP, wear what you like.[/quote]
Not unkind at all, don't be juvenile. Heels are - at least in my age group which is the same as OPs - increasingly uncommon, usually replaced by trainers or boots. It's merely the current fashion. I'd be surprised if I saw someone wearing heels for this reason. I didn't say heels are ugly or anything of the sort, merely less common. Are you always so oversensitive?

I spent a long time being very overweight, my summer wardrobe consisted of things that that fit me rather than things I like. I'm now 10 stone lighter and am finally able to go into any shop and buy whatever I like knowing it will fit AND look good..it's an amazing feeling.

I love buying and wearing nice clothes now, I spent too long hidden under big sacks and shapeless dresses, I now wear fitted clothes, denim shorts, vest tops and also heels. I'm 5'1 also and could never wear heels before, they give me confidence and I like them. Fuck anyone who comments negatively on my appearance, it took a lot of work to get this weight off and I'll dress how I damn well please, as should you OP. Nothing wrong with wanting to look and feel nice

@Posieandpip

Honestly I agree with PPs that heels aren't really 'in' anymore - I never see people wearing heels these days, always things like trainers and DMs, so maybe youe friends comment as it's unusual for people to wear them.

I don't mean this in a horrible way, but the things your friends said really sound like no big deal but I get the feeling you posted this because you want everyone to tell you they're jealous of you (not sure why else you included your weight)

OP take no notice of Gok Wan here, who is normalising your friends being rude and unkind.

OP if this came from a man there's a section of mumsnet who would call this "victim blaming/shaming" you know, when you're on the receiving end of someone's taunts but it's not them that's the problem, it's you for being affected by them.

To add to my previous comments, l don’t do heels myself. But l still do not think it appropriate for so called friends to knock someone else’s choice of what to wear.

I tend to live in dresses most of the year, l have friends who almost exclusively wear jeans. I won’t wear anything above the knee, another friend is regularly in short skirts.

Being critical of friends attire is just so wrong.

It's very unusual to see people in heels where I live unless for a very formal occasion, even at work in a team of around fifty the only one who wears heels is my PA who is retiring next year and is gobsmacked that we all just wear flats for the office. I'm pretty sure she'd go to tesco in heels. It's a little dated to wear heels all of the time, but I understand yours is more about height. The black jeans, black top, coloured heels did make me think sandy from grease though 😁.

DH wore jeans the other day when it was boiling out, I commented and asked if he wasn't far too hot and did he wasn't to put shorts on before we left. I'm not sure their comments are anything other than remarking on the out of the ordinary.