What would you do? Am I being unreasonable?

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My MIL bought both my daughters these Silver charm Bracelets when they were born. Theyre quite bulky and old fashioned. She keeps buying another charm to add to them every so often. The problem is, personally, I absolutely hate charm bracelets. I do not think they look nice. I’m a very “delicate” kind if Jewellery kind of person. My daughters are only little and too young to wear jewellery yet anyway but my MIL keeps banging on about them all the time..because she has one and she wanted them to have the same.
I realise she has bought them something “special” or she thinks is special but I really get a bit wound up by it. ( bit of extra info- she is a very opinionated, narcissistic lady who never ever listens to anyone, and is very eccentric. She is quite rude and even my husband gets cross and wound up with her alot).
Is it unreasonable of me to have expected my MIL to have run by us what jewellery she was going to buy? I find jewellery a very personal choice. If I ever have grandchildren I know I wouldnt buy them Jewellery without asking my daughters first. I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place because my husband thinks i am being ungrateful on this one. I am grateful for the thought...but they are such Ugly bracelets I dont want my girls to ever wear them. I think as well its because they’re like the one she wears and so its so full of importance to HER,( she loves to try and tell me that my children have HER hair colour, HER curly hair, HER flare for singing or acting and that SHE is going to tutor my children in amateur dramatics one day😩). Am I being just weird about the bracelets or does anyone else think its something she should have asked me about first?

You are being totally unreasonable.
It's up to your children to decide, when they're old enough, if they do or don't want to wear them.
I think it's a nice thought of their grandparent to do this, even if it's not your taste.

It sounds like you dislike her so much that anything she does is going to annoy you

YABVU and ridiculous!

I do think you're being a bit mean.

Like you said; jewellery is a personal choice but she's not asking you to wear them.

Your children may have different taste to you and that's fine.

I get why you're annoyed but just smile and say thanks. I found with my daughters that any jewellery items that they were bought as children mostly lay in the box for years, they were taken out occasionally and tried on/played with then I used to say let's put them back now so that they don't get broken and you can wear them properly when they fit/you're older. They never did wear them and as far as I know still have the items tucked away somewhere.

I would have loved a charm bracelet when I was a kid but my mum wouldn't allow it, she said they were common but I really envied those girls who had them and got new charms every birthday etc, it's years since I've seen one.

If MIL senses it winds you up she will be delighted so just smile and say how quaint

You are being a bit mean about this gift I think even if she is an irritating MiL generally.

Charm bracelets are keepsakes and as others have said adding a special charm on important occasions was customary. I inherited a charm bracelet from my late mother and whilst I would never wear it ( I agree it’s very bulky and cumbersome) I love looking at it and remembering my mum. It has some generic charms, horseshoes, padlock, but also some really interesting ones. A tiny map of Jersey where my parents honeymooned, a tiny movable merry go round, a whale with Jonah inside, an apple with Adam and Eve inside etc.

Sorry for the diversion but as you can see maybe one day those charms might be a lovely wander down memory lane for your children.

You are being ridiculous and actually no different from MIL imposing her tastes as you are doing the same.
FWIW, I don't like charm bracelets at all but DD does so when she asked for one and charms on special occasions, we got it for her. Her tastes, not mine.

They can sell them when older if they want.

Let them have the bracelets later.
I have one who likes delicate and one who seems to be an 85 year old living in a 25 year olds body.
They will grow up to have their own preferences.

YABU. My mum buys DD jewellery for when she's older (sometimes wears it on special occasions) and she's loved every single piece, even if it isn't my personal style. You don't know if your daughter's will like it or not, would you expect MIL to ask about clothes before buying those too?

That's a lovely idea. YABU. It's also ok for grandparents to see themselves/ their side of the family resemblance or attributes in their DGC. Surely that's one of the joys of having GC?

I know my ILs love it that ds1 is his dad as a child all over again, and DM loves that ds2 has our side of the family's looks. Funnily MIL thinks ds2 looks like my BIL, her other son.

It sounds like you resent your MIL. I can't tell if that's reasonable because I don't know the dynamic but you dont come across well in your post.

A gift is just that, she doesn't have to check with you. It's not bulky and need its own floor space (received enough of those gifts in my time!), it doesn't involve you having to do something with the dc. Your dds will probably like them.

YABU - let her get on with it, your daughters may love them later, they may hate them later, but they will have something from their grandma.

Colour me surprised you bandy "narcissistic" around. If she'd been buying delacate (in your opinion) tasteful jewellery that you like would you still use that word? This is your children's grandma not some strange, unrelated woman. What does your DH say?

I have one of these. People buy me charms for birthdays, Christmas, big occasions eg graduation.

I never wear it, it's massive now, but I absolutely love it. It reminds me of all the people who bought the charms and the occasions they were for.

I have some hideous jewellery bought by my grandmother. I never wear it. It lives in a box and I take it out every now and then and look at it. The box still smells like her perfume. I miss her.

Your daughters might not think they are ugly so might want to wear then when they are older. How often is my MIL keeps banging on about them all the time? If it's simply when they are given a charm then that seems fair enough. If it is every single day then that might need addressing, you could change the subject or just smile and nod.

It's between MIL and your daughters, so YABU.

If it was something potentially dangerous or unsuitable for your house she should ask really but jewellery just lives in a tiny box until they want to wear it.

Yabu. My grandparents bought me one and have bought me charms for it to. Admittedly is very precious and pricey so barely wear it day to day but since they’ve sadly departed it provides many memories from each of the charms. I was lucky that any charms I got were for special occasions such as significant birthdays/ getting into uni/ and I chose one that signifies each grandparents. They don’t have to wear them but they really are lovely keepsakes I find.

You find jewellery a personal choice, but you want to inflict your taste on your daughters as much as you feel your MIL has done.

Yeah sorry but YABVU. You don't own your daughters and you don't get to dictate their tastes or decide what other family members are allowed to buy for them as gifts. You clearly don't like this woman but she is their grandmother and the jewellery will probably be cherished by her granddaughters even if not to their taste.

Someone on your post comes across as very opinionated and narcissistic - but I don’t think it’s your MIL. YABU

How can you not see how unreasonable and controlling you're being?

Got to be a reverse

I think you’re right that it’s a personal choice, but that choice is your daughters’, not yours. Keep the bracelets for when the girls are old enough to wear them and let them decide if they want to. If they like them and want to wear them, there’s not much you can do about it even if it’s not to your taste.

She’s sounds very annoying OP. But the bracelets aren’t the problem.

Don’t worry about them - just focus on creating and maintaining boundaries with your MIL so you don’t feel so maddened but her.

You expect her to clear purchases with you? Really .

They may like them, presuming they don’t know your thoughts on them so placed in an awkward situation. You can’t assume they will share your tastes.

I think it’s a lovely keepsake for them. It will hold many memories.