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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say I'll never bother again

288 replies

Rosebel · 30/05/2021 11:16

Yesterday discussed with my older children and husband about going out today. They all seemed enthusiastic about it.
Except none of them bothered to get up until now. DD2 asked when we're going out but I said we weren't going now.
Weather is shit now and I'm pissed off with them. Yes I could have got them up earlier but they are teenagers and husband is supposed to be an adult. They all knew we were supposed to be going out.
My husband is bitchimg at me saying I should have woken him but FFS he knew the plan.
Got myself and baby ready but now just think why did I bother? So shall I just say fuck it, no more days out?

OP posts:
Original poster
Rosebel · 01/06/2021 18:12

Thanks for the supportive comments. I think some people haven't read all my posts so perhaps my fault for not including every detail.

OP posts:
StillCoughingandLaughing · 01/06/2021 18:43

@diddl

"you unilaterally decided no one was going."

Well there was nothing to stop the Dad taking them out was there-instead of bitching to Op!

Well yes, that’s true enough. But the OP says in her opening post that she told her daughter ‘We’re not going now’. Yes, her husband could have taken the kids anyway, but in the OP’s mind it seems the decision was made.

And then it’s also the OP’s fault for being upset that the booking was wasted.

Which booking is this? The OP never once mentioned having something booked - you must know something the rest of us don’t...

Shodan · 01/06/2021 18:49

@StillCoughingandLaughing

Like I said this day out was what they wanted and time was what they chose so that's when I booked it.

Those of us that read carefully saw this in the OP's posts.

Peach01 · 01/06/2021 19:26

It is annoying when everyone knew the plan, especially when the other adult can't get themselves up. I would've still tried to wake them though. I couldn't sit being annoyed and not try to do something about it.

Cadent · 01/06/2021 20:09

StillCoughing

Well yes, that’s true enough. But the OP says in her opening post that she told her daughter ‘We’re not going now’. Yes, her husband could have taken the kids anyway, but in the OP’s mind it seems the decision was made.

If her husband is capable of bitching to OP about her not waking him up, then I'm sure he's capable of deciding he'll take the kids himself as well.

Dishwashersaurous · 01/06/2021 20:14

How much did the booking cost? Are you going to make the teens pay the cost as it was wasted

StillCoughingandLaughing · 01/06/2021 20:41

@Cadent

StillCoughing

Well yes, that’s true enough. But the OP says in her opening post that she told her daughter ‘We’re not going now’. Yes, her husband could have taken the kids anyway, but in the OP’s mind it seems the decision was made.

If her husband is capable of bitching to OP about her not waking him up, then I'm sure he's capable of deciding he'll take the kids himself as well.

Again, where have I said he isn’t capable? If you read what I wrote, I said ‘Yes, her husband could have taken the kids anyway’. If I didn’t think he was capable, I would have said he couldn’t. Not that hard to understand.
Original poster
Rosebel · 01/06/2021 20:43

It was £30pp and no of I'm not going to make them pay it. My husband tried to rebook it but was fully booked this week (obviously).
He probably will rebook it at some point but I just refuse to rebook it myself. I don't care if it sounds petty, after all he should be capable of organising a day out.

OP posts:
Dishwashersaurous · 01/06/2021 20:55

Absolutely you should make them pay!

Its an expensive activity and they couldn't be bothered to get up.

Cadent · 01/06/2021 21:09

@StillCoughingandLaughing

Again, where have I said he isn’t capable? If you read what I wrote, I said ‘Yes, her husband could have taken the kids anyway’. If I didn’t think he was capable, I would have said he couldn’t. Not that hard to understand.

You also implied he didn't take the kids because the decision was made in OP's mind.

Mum2jenny · 01/06/2021 21:21

I feel sorry for the OP.

She booked a treat for her family with their agreement and they couldn’t arsed to get out of their beds to attend.

I’d be stepping back and booking no other treats ever again.

Let her dh put any other costs on his credit card.

In future OP just go with you and baby and fuck the rest of them

StillCoughingandLaughing · 01/06/2021 21:43

[quote Cadent]@StillCoughingandLaughing

Again, where have I said he isn’t capable? If you read what I wrote, I said ‘Yes, her husband could have taken the kids anyway’. If I didn’t think he was capable, I would have said he couldn’t. Not that hard to understand.

You also implied he didn't take the kids because the decision was made in OP's mind.[/quote]
I implied no such thing. The OP said ‘We’re not going’ - which to me means that, to HER mind, the decision was made. She didn’t say ‘I’m not going’.

Anyway, it’s all moot thanks to the massive drip feed that it was a pre-booked, pre-paid event.

Original poster
Rosebel · 01/06/2021 22:17

I thought it would be obvious it was pre booked and prepaid because where can you go at the moment where you don't book beforehand?

OP posts:
CroneAVirus · 01/06/2021 22:58

I thought it would be obvious it was pre booked and prepaid because where can you go at the moment where you don't book beforehand

That’s just another thing you’ve done wrong OP.

You’ve failed to do the cognitive labour on behalf of another poster, which means they now haven’t been able to read and understand your posts properly.

Tsk tsk tsk.

Hmm
CokeDrinker · 01/06/2021 23:01

Have to admit I didn't think anywhere was taking bookings at the moment? I imagined a waterslide park or something, where you just pay at the gates, or an art gallery or show, again normally pay at the gate. Who takes bookings during Covid?? I thought bookings would be too risky these days.

CroneAVirus · 01/06/2021 23:07

You have to book time slots for everything at the moment so that they can control numbers and maintain social distancing.

Literally everywhere is doing this.

KaleSlayer · 01/06/2021 23:18

You could have woke them up and had your day out, enjoyed yourself and not wasted money.

Then had a discussion afterwards about the things that you’re unhappy about and what you aren’t prepared to do anymore being as this issue is part of a bigger problem within your family.

StillCoughingandLaughing · 01/06/2021 23:22

@CroneAVirus

I thought it would be obvious it was pre booked and prepaid because where can you go at the moment where you don't book beforehand

That’s just another thing you’ve done wrong OP.

You’ve failed to do the cognitive labour on behalf of another poster, which means they now haven’t been able to read and understand your posts properly.

Tsk tsk tsk.

Hmm

I’ve never read such patronising crap. 40 - 50% of the posts have asked the OP why she was so wedded to a particular time; why didn’t they just go later. Are you really telling me the OP didn’t think, even once, in the space of nine pages, to say ‘Because there was an activity that has been booked and pre-paid. Because we didn’t leave on time, we missed it and lost the money’. Surely if she had done a little of her own ‘cognitive labour’ she would have worked out that this sort of detail might affect people’s responses?

Never mind the silly little Hmm faces - it really shouldn’t be difficult for you to work this out.

CroneAVirus · 01/06/2021 23:25

What I can’t work out is why it’s making you so angry.

StillCoughingandLaughing · 01/06/2021 23:27

@CroneAVirus

What I can’t work out is why it’s making you so angry.
This is the default response of a certain group of MNers. All it’s missing is the cringey ‘Are you feeling okay?’
CroneAVirus · 01/06/2021 23:32

Sorry you’re having a shit evening.

StillCoughingandLaughing · 01/06/2021 23:36

@CroneAVirus

Sorry you’re having a shit evening.
This is too good Grin You’re doing the work for me!
Original poster
Rosebel · 02/06/2021 07:03

I thought I had said it earlier but when I checked realised I hadn't. I'm a bit busy looking after my kids.

OP posts:
Dishwashersaurous · 02/06/2021 09:44

literally everything is precooked at the moment from art galleries to restaurants. You can't just turn up.

But if I'd paid a lot of money and precooked something I definitely would have dragged everyone out of bed so as not to waste money

StillCoughingandLaughing · 02/06/2021 10:46

@Rosebel

I thought I had said it earlier but when I checked realised I hadn't. I'm a bit busy looking after my kids.
Not too busy to post 12 times, but I understand. Kids card trumps all.