I fucking hate where we live and don't know what to do

[PorkAPoe]

I'm so upset, I fucking hate where we live.

We only bought the house in November and I just don't think moving now would be a possibility. There are jobs half done that we'd need to finish before selling which will take time to save up for.

I feel like crying every day.

It's because of our neighbours in the main. They are horrible and if I'd have seen them / heard them when we viewed I'd have not thought for a second about buying this house.

I'm terrified that we'll never get rid of the thing because of them.

Does anyone know if I have to declare that I'm on maternity for the sake of the mortgage? Or will it just go off what I usually earn? I'm on SMP at the moment but we can still afford mortgage payments fine. I just know if they see me going from bringing in X a month to £650, it might make it difficult!

(I wasn't on maternity at the time when we got the mortgage for this place)

I've also sent an email to the HA asking if they are looking to buy any houses on the estate.

If its a housing association house part of signing their tenancy will be an anti social behaviour clause.if you are concerned you could speak to the housing association. They can give people notice if there is anti social behaviour going on or crime going on at the addresses. Keep a diary of anything relevant. Report it to the h/a every time.

@PorkAPoe

Does anyone know if I have to declare that I'm on maternity for the sake of the mortgage? Or will it just go off what I usually earn? I'm on SMP at the moment but we can still afford mortgage payments fine. I just know if they see me going from bringing in X a month to £650, it might make it difficult!

(I wasn't on maternity at the time when we got the mortgage for this place)

It might vary by lender, but when we remortgaged last year to Nationwide, it had to be most recent three months payslips.

But we also declared I was pregnant and they queried my plans for after mat leave. We stated I would be returning on the same pay & terms and the mortgage was approved with no proof required.

I might first do a few of the suggestions mentioned in this thread to improve the situation, such as putting curtains in the kitchen window and barricading your property's perimeter better.

Then maybe give it a little more time because renters tend to move frequently and obnoxious ones tend to get evicted by their landlords. It would be a shame to go through the hassle and possible financial loss of selling your newly bought place only to discover the problem neighbors have moved.

Sorry, to be clear, not proof that I was returning to work, so you may be able to use your most recent payslips - which will be old - and also show/prove/explain that you are returning to work on x date.

You have my sympathy. My neighbours are a nightmare and due to them my house is now unsellable. They rent but even the landlord has given up with them (which is fine for him to do as he is still getting the rent money but I am the one stuck living next to them).

So unfair that people like that can get away with it.

They don't own it. It's owned by the housing association

Then get on to them. Where I live HA's take anti social behavior very seriously, complaints from both sides, drug use and noise would easily see them lose their tenancy.

No advice, but wanted to say you aren’t alone. I have a similar-ish situation. Bought a nice house and found out soon after that next door (which I asked about and told was rented) is rented out on very short-term lets. Somewhat like living next door to an airbnb.

It’s fine most of the time, quieter in fact than living next door to a family much of the time, but we have had some periods with really bad occupants. The owner wouldn’t do anything so the council got involved. I now can’t live with the uncertainty about what’s coming next and how long it might go on for. Any noise next door and I’m getting stressed!

I have the same worries you do about selling (though you’re obviously in a stronger position as you don’t have to declare a dispute - only make this formal if you want to make a go of staying there or can be reasonably sure the situation can be remedied), stressing about the possibility of viewings lining up with bad behaviour, etc.

So I get you, and it feels lonely because you don’t want people knowing there is an issue with the property

"So unfair that people like that can get away with it."

I agree 100%.

@PorkAPoe I would do the minimum of work to the house as cheaply as possible to make it look presentable and be ready to move asap.

If I was you I would be looking for proof the landlord knew about the neighbours behaviour and didn’t mention it in sales documents. You could then have a case to overturn the sale or at least get a discount / money back. My friend did this and was offered to sell back the house or take £80k. She took £80k.

@PorkAPoe

Would they even do anything anyway? I spent ages looking online about HA tenants causing issues etc... And practically everywhere was about how them having to leave is a last resort, mediation between the neighbours is the first step etc etc. I just don't think they'll do anything.

If they don't even know there's a problem, the HA will do nothing. If you speak to them, they may do something; and if they don't, all you've lost is a few minutes on the phone.

Agree sell it at auction if you can. Maybe move to rented and rent yours in the meantime. So sorry you have to deal with this OP. Bastards.

@PorkAPoe I’m on maternity and my normal income has just been taken into account, not maternity pay. I just needed a note from my employer to say when I’d be back at work. Most lenders do that nowadays.

I wouldn’t say anything to the housing association, they are very unlikely to care in my experience.

Id put trellis on the fence and turn the garden into a ‘woodland style’, lots of slender but tall trees like silver birches with smaller trees/flowering shrubs under them and flowers under that so they can’t see into your garden or into your kitchen.

I’d also put a water feature in and some wooden chimes or similar to block the noise from next door a little bit.

And a blind in the kitchen to make double sure they can’t see in.

I had an antisocial social housing neighbour who I ultimately got evicted, it was a year of stress but constant complaints to police and the council worked. My advice is keep a record and keep complaining to the HA, especially about threats, abuse or drug use, get your other neighbours to complain too, if you can stick it out it will work eventually.

Your solicitor will advise you what you do and don't have to declare when selling, if you made complaints about past tenants who have left by the time you sell then you won't necessarily have to declare and if you do, most buyers won't care.

Don't report them anonymously to the police for drugs, unless you have evidence, can't believe people think we can afford policing to that extent.

That said it isn't right that these situations are allowed and you have my every sympathy

Oh I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. What a dilemma. We're semi-detached to a HA property - right now it's a lovely quiet family that keep themselves to themselves, but I dread this scenario.

There should some anti social behavious clause in their tenancy - perhaps try ring the local housing officer to discuss. And maybe ask if the HA is looking to buy up homes in the area - I know around here they are, esp if you're attached to a property they already own.

Bless, it's miserable having horrible neighbours . Mine aren't criminal but they are grotty, smoke weed that wafts into my house and have moaned about my kids. I hope you sort out a plan.

Do not complain to council or approach them You will have to declare disputes when you sell.

Keep quiet. Do the house up and sell

I had awful neighbours twice and each sale was hell but I got there. Live in a fab house now secluded garden with nice neighbours.

You will get there too Be super careful next time. Frequent Drive bys before exchanging co tracts etc.

Keep emailing HA and complaining, record the noise of you can.

I had issues with some neighbours last year, all came to head one night when they were having a party and a fight broke out outside, a girl was screaming and talking about drugs she had been given, there were small children in the house. Police were called and several people (neighbours) put in complaints to HA, they were actually really good and gave the neighbours a warning (any more incidents and they would be kicked out), pretty sure social services were called too. Things have been pretty quiet since, no police visits, no parties or shouting.

Oh my gosh I could have written this a couple of weeks ago.. I can almost feel what you’re going through.. I’m the same anxious and don’t like confrontation but had to confront our noisy neighbour who was playing her music/bass at a stupidly loud level until 2-3 in the morning. It was horrible, I just did not want to be here and still don’t. Sadly my hands are tied also as if we moved we would need to apply for another mortgage and I’m currently pregnant in temporary work with no official contract earning a considerably lower amount in comparison to what I was when we applied for our mortgage. So I’ve had to come to terms with being stuck here.
It’s fucking horrendous. You are not alone. I would say if you are in the position to move financially.. sod it if things haven’t been done.. sell it and look for something cheaper (if you are going to lose money). It’s your home and your place of shelter and peace.. you shouldn’t have to put up with it.

You can get film that you put on the windows that's one way - you can see out but no one can see in. It gives you complete privacy.

www.amazon.co.uk/one-way-window-film/s?k=one+way+window+film&tag=mumsnetforu03-21

Just be aware that this only works in natural light, when you put the lights on inside you'd need to draw the curtains but I guess you'd do that anyway.

It's brilliant for the day time and you'd get complete privacy back as they literally couldn't see in.

It isn't a full solution but you can get a slightly mirrored privacy film quite cheaply. You can see out, it looks very slightly darker, but from the outside it is reflective unless you are against it or it's much brighter inside. We have awful neighbours too who used to look in deliberately and shout, now I can have the curtains open without them seeing in. It might help with the kitchen side at least?

I hope you are free from the arseholes soon OP.

OP it's so disappointing when you move and it's not what you expected. I would say, don't panic, it may get better. You never know what's round the corner. Keep planning on your home refurb then hopefully you can sell at a profit.