To ask DH not to poo in our en-suite

[fizzioh]

For several months now DH has had a bit of a dodgy tum. He’s under the GP and it’s looking likely he has IBS.

On top of excessive (foul smelling) wind and very frequent toilet trips, his shit absolutely stinks.

I’m not expecting roses, but it’s far far beyond a normal smell.

He can easily fill the whole house with a stench when he goes to the toilet, which could easily be mistaken for a rotten dead animal.

I’ve asked him very kindly, and considerately, if for the foreseeable, and whilst he’s tum is still causing him issues, if he could hold off using the en-suite for a poo.

It’s just awful when he goes and our bedroom stinks for hours; even with the windows open and lots of air fresheners.

He’s told me it’s easier to use out en-suite in the middle of the night and he prefers that toilet in general, but when he goes there have been times the smell has woken me up and I have to sleep on the couch because I’m gagging!!!

What is the point of an en-suite if you can’t use it?

Total waste of space.

Dumping threads are poopular tonight 💩

But surely if he poos in your main toilet then everyone else in the house/visitors would have to deal with the smell? Open the window, close the door and get him to spray for a really long time.

What on earth? It’s a toilet not somewhere to have your cup of teA. Wow people are sensitive. We all poo it’s not a secret and no ones smells like roses.

YANBU. I have enforced the same in our house.

Aesop post poo drops. I promise you.

I have IBS.
This thread is making me feel so bad.
If I need the loo, I need it NOW!
Had no idea that IBS was considered to be a judgement call.

Yabvu for starting such a disgusting thread.

My DH has learnt to mid flush to decrease the smell, he's also competent enough to open the window, use a vip-poo type product and if needed to fill the sink with hot water and drop some essential oils in.

Your DH needs to learn tricks like these and consider others if he can't make it to the bathroom that is not connected to the bedroom. He should also be seeking assistance from a dietician to make life more pleasant for himself.

He needs to put his hand behind himself and start flushing as soon as the (majority of the) shit is out. And then flush again after finishing/wiping. Absolutely antisocial to make the bedroom stink unless he's physically disabled and cannot quickly take countermeasures.

A large box of matches is your friend.

Strike liberally around the house.
Works 10 times better than air fresheners and open windows, although you might need to watch for the smoke alarms

@LST I realise that not everyone has an en-suite. I don’t either. But when you’re having to get up multiple times at night it’s exhausting and ibs and the fluid loss etc can make you shattered anyway then making him go further than necessary isn’t fair in my opinion. He’s unwell, it’s not his fault. Would you expect someone who was vomiting due to chemo or hyperemesis or something go to the further bathroom because it inconveniences you.
I think people think toilet issues are either gross or no big deal and until they’ve suffered have no idea.

@1Morewineplease

I have IBS. This thread is making me feel so bad. If I need the loo, I need it NOW! Had no idea that IBS was considered to be a judgement call.

Quite!! I have coeliac and Crohn’s diseases. It’s a case of I need to go then I need to go. It’s not something you can control.

It depends how much warning he gets when it happens. I get that it stinks but sometimes there’s no choice

I totally agree with striking a match-cheap and fast solution

@aiwblam

He needs to put his hand behind himself and start flushing as soon as the (majority of the) shit is out. And then flush again after finishing/wiping. Absolutely antisocial to make the bedroom stink unless he's physically disabled and cannot quickly take countermeasures.

He has an illness he needs meds not an ASBO.

This is why I hate ensuites and don't understand why new builds have them attached to every bedroom! Why would you want to shit so close to where you sleep or lie in bed listening to your partner doing it! Convert it into a walk in wardrobe and keep the bathrooms off hallways instead of bedrooms!

@Lulola

I have IBS and it is urgent, but I wouldn’t go in the en-suite overnight unless I was really ill. During the day I use the en-suite on purpose because it’s out of the way and keeps the family bathroom nicer for everyone else, but on a night I do the opposite. There has been a couple of occasions where it has been very frequent and urgent and DP has slept on the sofa so that I can manage it privately.

I wouldn’t take IBS as an excuse regularly!

Some peoples ibs is frequent and urgent all the time. I didn’t leave my house for over a year except for dire emergencies at one stage.

I would try some better-quality odour neutralisers, as suggested above. Maybe a combination of VIPoo/Poo-pourri, a struck match, and even some scented wax cubes or diffuser.

Unless he's unwilling to try the above or has tried all those options with no luck, I wouldn't forbid him from using the loo for its intended purpose.

I’d find that such a turn off!!!

Poor man 🙁
Your not even sure if it is IBS yet... I hope it's not too serious and I hope he feels better soon.

At least he has your sympathy and support..oh no wait 🙄

Poor guy - IBS is an awful condition (I have it, but it's managed much more now). My DH was never anything less than supportive, and wouldn't harangue me about which toilet to use

@Lettuceforlunch

I’d find that such a turn off!!!

You know that vow about in sickness and in health?

@BeachWaves2 , @RosaBudDrood exactly!!

This thread is actually disgusting. I have ibd and ibs and if I need to go I need to go. I wouldn’t care less about the toilet and thank fuck my partners not a judgmental arsehole like some of the posters commenting here. It’s a toilet and you aren’t the queen give it a rest.