Two week holiday, family room, no sex

[Timetheworldsaysicantafford]

We are looking to book a special holiday for 2022 to Walt Disney World - two young children, and after researching I think the best option for us would be a family room onsite rather than a villa with separate bedrooms. Husband is grumpy because that would mean no sex for two weeks. I'm frustrated because I don't see how that should be the main factor deciding this type of holiday?! Perspective needed!!

@sweetypop

We're off to Disney and I'm dreading the room situation. I love my family but fuck me they drive me mental especially when in a confined space... 5 of us sharing one room. Believe me if I could upgrade (which would actually be downgrading to a value hotel for a suite) it would cost another 3- 4K on top of the 5.5k it's already costing... and that's without the dining plan

5.5k? To share a room?

I love a good rollercoaster, & I'm on a decent salary, but holy crap. I'd expect that to cover a month of travelling for a family.

Also, bathroom sex might be ok as an interesting one off, but doesn't sound like it'd be much fun for a fortnight if you're both looking forward to some holiday bonking.

I think if my dc were Disney aged & I wanted to do it, I'd resign myself to it being expensive & not adult friendly - as a one off.

@Meatshake

That sounds shit, not just for the lack of sex but what do you do once the kids are in bed? Sit in the dark in silence?

This.

DH and I and two < 7 kids have done it for the odd night or two in hotels, and it's dreadful.

Takes the kids ages to get to sleep as they wind each other up, and when they do get to sleep we can't chat/watch tv or play games or anything as they require light and noise, so inevitably we end just just reading or playing with phones in silence from about 8/9pm onwards. Awesome.

@WinterBabyof89

Disney isn’t a typical holiday - it’s not like going to Italy for a sexy little weekend. If you’re doing it right it’s a graft, leaving very little excess energy to worry about fitting in sex.

I went with my parents to Disney Land as a child with my sister and we shared a family room - no issues from a child’s perspective as we were out early, back late, tired and went straight to bed.
Not sure what my parents did but I’m pretty sure they would have been just as exhausted as us as the days are long, or they got creative and we were none the wiser. As others have said, the bathroom is a good option.

I have great memories of that holiday - hope your family have the same.

"It's a graft"..."they would have been just as exhausted as us". I got to say, I have always been decidedly lukewarm about the idea of Disney anyway but none of this is selling it to me.

I'd be a bit annoyed to be using half of my annual leave and spending a lot of money to spend all my days at Disney doing kids stuff AND all my evenings tiptoeing around in the dark because they're asleep and getting no adult time - regardless of whether sex is on the menu

This is my view too. I could cope with 2 weeks without sex, but 2 weeks of having to be silent from potentially 7/8pm, not turning the light on to read, no TV or grown up conversations?

My parents always booked one hotel room on holidays. I don't know how they found it, but I got frustrated (and increasingly tired and grumpy) at getting woken up in the night by my parents moving around although you may have a stronger bladder than my parents

You can have sex in the bathroom. That problem is very easily solved.

But I agree with PPs that 2 whole weeks sharing one room with the kids sounds awful.

We had a California holiday our self catering apartment was a short drive from Disney. We went for 2 days and all agreed that was more than enough. It wasn’t the highlight of the holiday either.

Tell your DH he’s a an absolute twat and that this is pathetic. It’s two weeks and budget wise it’ll make the difference between your kids having a better time staying at Disney, on site. This is a holiday they’ll always remember- as I do from when my parents took us. We all stayed in one room for budgetary reasons and it was an amazing time that we still talk about. How tragic would it have been to have not had those experiences because my Dad couldn’t have coped for a fortnight without getting his end away?!! Is that what he will still be thinking in 30 years time when you all sit around and reminisce about that holiday to Disney.... you’re all around the Christmas dinner table laughing about how funny it was when little Jimmy got embarrassed having his picture taken with Aladdin and how thrilled little Lucy was at meeting Princess Elsa and meanwhile dad is sulking in the corner remembering how difficult it was for him not to get his dick wet for a fortnight? Come on. Tell him if he wants to make this the issue above and beyond your kids having an exciting and memorable holiday then you can make sure he goes way longer than 14 days without sex. Knobhead.

DH and I both agreed that we would rather stay at home than stay in a single room with the kids. I like to chill out when they are in bed knowing they are safe and tucked away in their room. I do not want to go on holiday when I can't have a bath of an evening or watch some TV. Or even enjoy a takeaway together.

I'm also an insomniac and often need somewhere to sleep alone when I just can't get to sleep. 2 weeks listening to my husband and son's snore would drive me crazy.

at the suggestion that standing all day in ride queues is exhausting.

Pre-kids DH spent holidays skiing all day. We still managed to stay awake long enough in the evenings to want to do something other than sitting in a darkened room past 8pm.

I hate sharing a room with the kids and always have done except when they were really small. No-one gets a decent sleep.

However Disney is a bit different. Firstly, the time difference means you’re asleep really early at least for the first few days. And the days are busy and long and everyone is shattered.

Depending on the age of your kids, you’ll be able to manage quickies (quietly in the bedroom or bathroom).

Might be better to have a week at a Disney hotel and a week in an apartment a bit further away. Too much Disney would get on my nerves anyway and it’s miles cheaper to stay in an apartment for some or all of the time. (Can recommend Cabana Bay/Sapphire Falls for Universal).

Transport and parking is great and you need to think about the fact they are LONG days at the parks. It’s nice to go back to somewhere with a bit more space and no people.

If we went again I’d get an apartment or villa though. Much more relaxed and then tag 3 or 5 nights at the end in an on-site accommodation. It all depends on how much you can cope with other people being i your face.

@SteveArnottsCodeine

Tell your DH he’s a an absolute twat and that this is pathetic. It’s two weeks and budget wise it’ll make the difference between your kids having a better time staying at Disney, on site. This is a holiday they’ll always remember- as I do from when my parents took us. We all stayed in one room for budgetary reasons and it was an amazing time that we still talk about. How tragic would it have been to have not had those experiences because my Dad couldn’t have coped for a fortnight without getting his end away?!! Is that what he will still be thinking in 30 years time when you all sit around and reminisce about that holiday to Disney.... you’re all around the Christmas dinner table laughing about how funny it was when little Jimmy got embarrassed having his picture taken with Aladdin and how thrilled little Lucy was at meeting Princess Elsa and meanwhile dad is sulking in the corner remembering how difficult it was for him not to get his dick wet for a fortnight? Come on. Tell him if he wants to make this the issue above and beyond your kids having an exciting and memorable holiday then you can make sure he goes way longer than 14 days without sex. Knobhead.

I think you might need to rethink your use of the word 'tragic'. The OPs children are already extremely priveleged to be brought on such a holiday, it is hardly time in the Gulag to stay in a two bedroomed apartment off site instead of all in a room together. Just because your family dynamic is clearly to treat children like they are the centre of the universe and that the hard working parents who you know, pay for the holiday can get stuffed, does not mean everyone feels that way. On the specific point of 2 weeks without sex, it won't kill him obviously and maybe he is being a bit of a knob about it. But 2 weeks of annual leave and a huge amount of money being spent on something where the children are the SOLE and only focus is not something I would ever go along with

We've travelled to most places in Europe and to the Caribbean and mostly stayed in a large family room right up until the kids were in their teens. And regularly stayed in our touring caravan in the UK. It's never been a problem for us having enough space or for sex! It's perfectly doable. Being able to afford to go to nice destinations by staying in one room outweighs everything else and we'd rather the kids were safe with us rather than in another room.

@user1487194234

Also we go to WDW every 2nd year,and really although we always have a great time,let’s be honest it’s for the DC I need a bit of us time at night

I go for me as does his lordship, the kids going is a nice extra :D

We are going next year as well - there was a pretty nice offer released this week which is the best it will be for a while.
My "kids" will be 16 and 18 and we are sharing a room. We know from experience that we are too knackered for sex - although we did consider 2 rooms, the 3k extra was too much and in consultation with the kids we decided to share. (I'm going to need earplugs for all the boy snoring)

If sex is such a big part of your normal day to day life, then get two rooms, if it isnt then tell your DH to get a grip.

Hope you have a lot of fun!

Florida is Hell with worse food and less interesting people. Why not go to Boston, visit civilized historic attractions, and enjoy a much better climate?

Is your husband fully aware of what a holiday to WDW entails? Certainly I can recall early starts, long days involving lots of walking plus adding in the heat and everyone was exhausted by the time we got back to the accommodation. If you want to get value for money with tickets and passes then it will be full on for 14 days, great fun but relaxing it is not.

You could end up spending £000s more for two rooms and he'll be too knackered anyway.

Personally, I'd be happy to forgo the sex for two weeks and have more money to spend in the gift shops.

@theleafandnotthetree two things:

1. I think you know how I was defining ”tragic” here; as in the colloquial “all-encompassing derision that asserts a person’s utter lack of redeemable qualities” -way rather than the “characterised by extreme distress or sorrow” -OED way

and

b) you sound like a lot of fun and your kids are very lucky. I expect you have also never let them believe in Father Christmas either, lest they get out of infant school believing that a magic man brings those toys rather than the money that you’ve worked bloody hard for because you won’t have any child of yours not understanding the value of money even if they are only four

Sometimes Mumsnet makes me really sad for some kids.

We’ve always shared a room with the kids on holiday, just as I did when I was a kid and sometimes even as an adult with my mum. Maybe it’s because we’re poor and can’t afford big places but it’s always been kind of nice. I can have sex any time normally I don’t need to go to a hot country and pretend it’s special.

We had two weeks in animal lodge shared room with dc.
It was fantastic but totally exhausting.
Trying to remember if we just collapsed at night after a beer on the balcony or managed any sex.
The bathroom always works if needed.
But Disney was early starts, hot days and late firework finishes.
With the planning, maps and carrying water in rucksacks it reminded me of army training to be honest.

Christ, how unattractive! He's perfectly allowed to have a wank if he really can't bear it, but expecting his cock to come higher up the pecking order than your dc on a holiday to disneyland is pretty special.

If I had to schlep to the parks each day and do parking and trams and add an hour to our day because of it etc because that is what DH wanted there is a good chance I would be irritated enough that we probably wouldn't be having sex. We wouldn't be able to go back to the room for a break and a swim or a nap which is a shame.

My kids are grown now but when they were tiny we didn't put them to sleep in a quiet and dark room. We turned the lights off but the hall light was usually on. The bathroom was close to where they slept so they would hear noise and we walked around the house making noise. So they got used to sleeping and napping with noise and some light. So when we travelled it wasn't a big deal to have a bedside light on and the TV on low. Sometimes they'd wake a little and I'd tell them to go back to sleep and they'd drift off again.

When we were on holiday they were often up late at night anyway and if it messed with their sleep we'd come home at lunchtime for a nap and a break from touristing. DH is all about lovely afternoon naps on holiday anyway.

A two queen room was plenty of space for us with two kids.

Can you break up your holiday a little? Have a couple of days in the middle in a VRBO or AirBnB or something with a pool and some space? Stay near the parks for most of the time but a short part when DH gets something for him too. Alternatively, do they have a kids club there that you could send them to and sneak back to the room?

I'm in agreement with a bunch of other people. I don't go to Disney for R&R and intimacy. I'm pretty shattered when I get back.

I never understand why so many people on Mumsnet have such contempt for men who like to be intimate with their partners. As if it's some disgusting act only selfish perverts engage in.

Yeah, your husband will survive without sex for 2 weeks if you insist. Or you'll find somewhere else to do it. But I dont see why he should be ridiculed for being down about not being able to be intimate with the woman he loves.

also I get the holiday R&R= increased intimacy but I don't get the hot country = sex thing. Hot and sweaty isn't that attractive.

after walking those parks and queuing for rides and food every day... even with priority passes..

Sleep will be your lover for 14 nights 😂

Book a one bedroom at Old key west resort, look the rooms up online. We stayed as a family of 5 and it was brilliant. Huge massive master bedroom and the kids sleep in the living room area on pull out beds. Perfect and loads of room for us all.

He won't die without having sex! Unless he’s prepared to spring for another room/suite he's got to accept it's one room for everyone.

Disney is knackering. Beds are for sleep!!