to be surprised at how many Mumsnetters are fine with pornography? II

[Judy1234]

Continuing the previous thread - people's sexuality varies hugely and what some people think is disgusting is good fun for others. It's impossible to generalise and say XYZ practice is wrong or repugnant and I agree with the posts at the end of the other thread that porn often just reflects what people do. Obviously you pick where your own interests lie and are glad human beings are diverse.

"n porn sex is something that is done to a woman" nope your not right with this blanket statement - not at all. I think that there is something else going on here if thats what you think it is - but then i cant actually trust your blanket statements as i can't trust that you have actually seen porn to make this statement.

genuine question here as i have not seen the site and im not about to start looking at internet porn, but surely these women are actors? I would have thought that women are quite highly paid to do this sort of work? But as i have said before, that is the one thing that makes me uncomfortable about porn and that is, is the woman getting a fair deal? I mean, some of those men are UGLY and no amount of money in the world would persuade me! Im taking a lighthearted stance on this, but i do appreciate it is a serious subject

"even the worst levels of misogyny are acceptable as long as it means that men get their rocks off."

but is it mysogyny is i get my rocks off?

why are women sex workers and not men the subjugated?

obm, the language is definitely a concern
but the actions on the screenshots don't reflect that -
it's all talk and no trousers.

The moment that line is crosssed on mainstream sites
they should be treated the same way Rockstar Games
were treated when they released their latest game.
They should be told to stop!

i think i agree custy, I like porn, so does DP, but it is usually me who watches it, while DP keeps me entertained elsewhere, if you see what i mean, it is definately the woman getting her rocks off in this house. And none of that porn made by women for women, i dont want to look at mens bodies, i dont want to look at sexual positions bla bla bla, i want to see, up close and personal - couldnt care a shit waht the man looks like, or the woman.

Well, stop speaking for all women then!!

Do you think it is possible for a woman to enjoy group sex or is it ALL gang rape? At the moment, it sounds like the latter

Criticism has been given, all porn defenders (as you like to call us) have said regulation can be stronger and should be

Please don't tell me about being raped, I have been (it wasn't a sexual act, it was a violent act) In America, even flimsy contracts are very legal, if people who sign them don't read them, well they are partly to blame. It is very easy to take people to court in the states. Getting into porn, signing a contract then not wanting to follow through, isn't rape. Walk away if they don't want to go through with it and forfeit all monies

Your arguments aren't standing as you come across as being very anti any sex that isn't missionary, as being deviant

Read that article about the giril who was abused by BangBus lucyellensmum. She wasn't an actor, she was just someone with fuckwit boyfriend who fancied himself as a bit of a pimp and pimped her out to Bangbros.

Yes it's misogyny if you get your rocks off custardo, but the point is that men are the overwhelming majority of consumers. Most women here had never heard of BangBros, ask any man under 40 and he'll probably know exaclty what you are talking about.

:"n porn sex is something that is done to a woman" nope your not right with this blanket statement - not at all. I think that there is something else going on here if thats what you think it is - but then i cant actually trust your blanket statements as i can't trust that you have actually seen porn to make this statement."

The longer these threads the ruder I want to be back to the people being rude on these threads. I don't actually give a toss if you trust what I say. Do you really think that is a priority for me, persuading Custardo to trust me? I have seen porn. I don't look at it now if I can avoid it. There are enough verbal descriptions out there to be fairly clear what is in porn. Ass to mouth for example is fairly graphic and sums up what is being done to the woman.

I am still stunned, Elisabethh.
You really could have told us before that you have not actually seen any pornography!
You have just read about it.

And you have got the gall to just go on ranting

'I see BangBus..'
No, you have not.

DaddyJ, thanks for the comment. Just to clarify, I wasn't shocked at the pictorial content I met on Bangbros, I'm not naive and know 'wank fodder' isn't all roses, romance and floaty dresses

It was the 'nothing gets hurt except this slut's insides' which really rattled me. That to me is a clear incitement to despise women, especially women who are seen to enjoy sex, for they are 'sluts' and fair game to be violently 'banged' as if they felt no pain. If that's the message teen boys get from readily available porn it doesn't bode well for fostering healthy attitudes to real women, does it?

well if pretty women are having sex on telly with ugly men in a van for money - then considering there is no welare system in america - perhaps poverty as opposed to porn should be looked at in one of the wealthiest nations.

if this girl did it becuase of low self esteem - then - its not a law that needs to be passed - or else we should also ban chocolate for fat people " for their own good"

the arguments just dont add up

I bet you want to be rude
now that you have been exposed as a fraud!

This is like an episode of Rogue Traders -
go on, let rip, dogy anti-porn merchant, you

"Do you really think that is a priority for me, persuading Custardo to trust me?"

oh Elizabeth come....on - if you are trying to make a cohesive and intelligent argument then admit you have never seen the source of that which you are arguing against - i think it is relevant to the person with whom you are discussing - no?

interesting daddyj
i think i think that the language is critical.

ie plain fucking fine (well not, but i've gone on about that already)

plain fucking plus 'fuck you you fucking little bitch etc etc" v different.

Oenophile, that is the real debate, I agree with you there!

And I do hope mmj comes back to add to that point.

But what to do?
What to do about rap & hip-hop which made
the 'ho' and 'beatch' popular in the first place?

christ, that is not good, i would have to agree that that site is not good, and elizabeth that does sound outrageous as well. That sort of language about a woman is disgusting and even Daddyj, you have to admit that is wrong. Especially as the site appears to be aimed at young men?? Dont know, havent seen it, not going to look, ive not eaten!

I think Elizabeth, your points about this site in general are very valid. Can i just ask as i dont have time to read the other thread how you would feel about porn where the actress was well paid, good at her job and happy to perform all sorts of things, within reason.

Also, what does Ass to mouth mean, that surely cannot be what i think it means - [vomit]

v good post oenophile esp the bit about women who enjoy sex deserving contempt

And that's where my concern comes in that
I voiced on the other thread in response to
ruty and others:

Porn constantly evolves - how can we say:
right, you have crossed a line now?

onebatmother, i would definately NOT want to see that on a site like bangbros, but i DO like my DP to say that to me when we have sex, does that make me a freak? We have a very equal (in fact the power probably tips more in my direction if we are honest)relationship but sometimes, i like it a bit rough around the edges. I think lots of women do, or is it really just me? I havent name changed to post this and i post alot here, but im not ashamed of my views and i would hate to think that people would judge me on my posts too. But i guess we live in a judgemental society.

"oh Elizabeth come....on - if you are trying to make a cohesive and intelligent argument then admit you have never seen the source of that which you are arguing against - i think it is relevant to the person with whom you are discussing - no?"

I can't watch porn. It literally disturbs me now because I was exposed to it when I was a kid (see other thread) and as a young adult. I can't watch women being abused because I feel empathy with them. I'm not the only person who has this problem. People with PTSD can be caused to have flashbacks with porn.

I haven't lied about the contents of BangBros or any other porn. Ass to mouth exists, gagging porn exists, gang rape scenes exist, double penetration exists. I'm not going to watch those things because I don't want to see women being tortured but I'll definitely speak out against them and about the whole of pornography which is based on hatred of women.

Also I have seen porn, I know its content and I understand the mindset that creates it and watches it.

elizabeth, i havent read the other thread, but please dont take this the wrong way, im going to step away from this thread now, as i jokingly made some stupid comments and upset you, BUT i can see this whole thing is actually quite upsetting for you, so much so that you feel you need to be quite vociferous in your campaign. Might i suggest that you stop. Seriously, you obviously have some personal issues with this and this thread seems to have taken a shitty turn for you. I think carrying on will be upsetting for you and that is why i am not going to comment any further. I think this is something that you should discuss, but not here.

You know that girl in the BangBros article I linked to was crying. It means she didn't like what was being done to her. Sex that a woman doesn't want is rape. Just because she was paid for it doesn't mean that what was done to her didn't damage her (and she didn't get paid her boyfriend stole the money).

I was going to cut and paste a Robert Jensen article that describes the sort of things that are done to women in mainstream porn (he has watched it) but then I had to second guess myself because probably the descriptions would be enough to get me banned from Mumsnet. They are incredibly offensive and disturbing.

If you are still in denial about what porn is like these days, please read the article in this link (it's a better option than going to the BangBros website and being disturbed and offended) -

mwcnews.net/content/view/3286/26/

honestly elizabeth, i really do think you should stop. I dont want to think that you are going to have a shit weekend because you are going to be haunted by this thread. Your posts elsewhere have always been really usefull, sympathetic and supportive, you are a great Mnetter and im really upset that i have upset you. Please just give yourself a rest from this, its clearly upsetting you.

I do need to stop, but it's to get on with the evening LucyEllensMum, not because I have some kind of issue. I mean I do have issues with porn but I think that is a normal healthy reaction rather than this numb acceptance of its viciousness that we see displayed here.

Being disturbed by porno images and empathising with the women in it is the healthy reaction, being turned on by ATM, gagging porn, "pussy destoyers', barely legal etc etc is the unhealthy one.

So thanks for your concern but honestly my view is that probably quite a few of the porn users here need to talk to someone rather than vocifeously defending their habits (and sometimes attacking the people who disagree with them in the process). Finding out why their empathy for vulnerable women seems to be blunted might be a good place to start.

LEM - I admire your comments & honesty about the BDSM subject.