to be surprised at how many Mumsnetters are fine with pornography? II

[Judy1234]

Continuing the previous thread - people's sexuality varies hugely and what some people think is disgusting is good fun for others. It's impossible to generalise and say XYZ practice is wrong or repugnant and I agree with the posts at the end of the other thread that porn often just reflects what people do. Obviously you pick where your own interests lie and are glad human beings are diverse.

Yes, women are designed to marry a very dull and stable man and then to want sex particularly when ovulating with as many sexy unstable men with good genes as possible. Probably why so many babies are their father's child.

Most rapes are of people you know, not strangers and I would be very surprised if they were anything to do with porn. I think people's sexual instincts they are largely born with rather than moulded by what they've viewed.

pixie, i have answered that sort of, elsewhere. I would not be happy for my DD to be a porn actress, i would be ok with glamour model providing i was assured that she was in the driving seat as it were. But it is really difficult to answer that properly as she is very much a rampant feminist, grrrr porn is disgusting type.

"Most rapes are of people you know, not strangers and I would be very surprised if they were anything to do with porn. I think people's sexual instincts they are largely born with rather than moulded by what they've viewed."

Xenia - Some men do not have the intelligence to realise that not ALL women like porn and not ALL women like doing the sex acts that porn stars do and I personally believe it can lead SOME men to rape a woman. I have personal experience, I had my drink spiked and was raped by a man who was a friend of a guy I had dated briefly - he was into porn big time.

You have a fascinating job, MT.

How do people get these great jobs? Why don't I know this already?

Sigh.

MT you say you're 'trying to get as clear (and non ideologically biased) picture of human sexuality as I can.'

you do know the impossibility of that don't you? i'm assuming your research is quantitative but given that 'rape' is a meaning laden concept. with huge socio/cultural relevance, qualitative research would be more appropriate. at which point an explicit acknowledgement of your inevitable ideological bias is a part of the research process.

human sexuality, imo, is a subjective and intersubjective process rather than an empirically definable and categorisable activity?

PD, that must have been awful for you but I don't think you can draw that conclusion. He might have gone to church a lot too and was trying to celibate and would you extrapolate that to therefore he raped because of those factors.

If PD can't draw the conclusion that the porn influenced the rapist's behaviour Xenia how can you draw the opposite conclusion that people are born with their sexual instincts? Based on what?

The guy in question is a guy that deals in porn not sure where he gets it and I really don't care, I have also heard this guy has raped at least one other woman.

He is a scumbag that has no respect for ANY woman and I stand by what I said in my other post that watching porn CAN (admittedly probably only a small minority of men) lead a man to rape a woman.

Men like him think ALL women are UP FOR IT and the sex acts women are made/or not made to do in porn reflects ALL women and I can assure you, I have never and never will do a lot of stuff that porn actresses do.

BTW, where is Elizabetth? I enjoyed reading her posts.

Walnut, at the mo I am only studying, and only part time - if that!

In respect to Eliz's thread, I think this needs another thread, else it really will be a hijack.

[[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/9/426414?rnd=1195503497295 here]

here

Base on observation. I know a lot of gay men and most have felt gay from a very young age. Same with a lot of other sexual inclinations.

Reading list for today (!) is The Woman That Never Evolved

Mothernature

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/offer-listing/074254351X/ref=dp_olp_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1195505217&sr=1-1 Who's Afraid of Charles Darwin: debating feminism and evolutionary theory]]

The first one especially with regards to female evolved sexuality and the last for a wonderful debate on feminsm and evolution. I'd defo recomment that one to you Soph as it concernes your question directly, and better than I could recount.

oops, wrong thread

Yes, Xenia you are right. gayness (for men at least) does seem to be something you are born. Femnale sexuality is known to be more 'plastic' - thought to be concerned with the need to create female alliances to counter male agression (to offspring) in our evolutionary history

www.theage.com.au/news/national/sex-acts-copied-from-online-porn-sites/2007/11/04/1194117879189.html

Back for one more thing, I think this needs to be added to here, an article I just came across. It confirms all the worst fears about what being exposed to pornography can do to children, particularly now when it is so culturally acceptable and mainstream -

"Sex acts copied from online porn sites

GIRLS only just into puberty are copying sexual acts they see in internet pornography, believing they must be normal, child psychologist Michael Carr-Gregg said.

Dr Carr-Gregg said large numbers of teenage girls had engaged in behaviour such as group sex or anal sex, which they wouldn't have done without seeing it online.

"Girls have new sexual practices. We've found that when they view that stuff they feel compelled to copy it," he said yesterday.

"It's causing young women to do things they wouldn't have done but because it's online they think it's normal. We are talking about girls who have just come into puberty."

He said a survey on cyber-bullying run via Girlfriend magazine showed that 41 per cent had been asked to post a naked or semi-naked picture of themselves on the internet.

"That's incredibly high, and it's against the law. If you take a picture and send it, you are manufacturing and distributing child pornography.

"Kids don't understand the seriousness of what they are doing, or that whenever they send something to cyberspace, it can't be taken back.""

Elizabetth: that article proves nothing at all. It's one bloke's opinion, and he doesn;t give any figures in support of it. His assertion that girls who 'view that stuff feel compelled to copy it' may be paraphrased but it's pretty unsulting to sugest that they have no minds of their own. He may also be falling into the absolutely classic psychologist error of extrapolating from what he encounters ie: people who come to me are messed up, they report X behaviour pattern therefore X behaviour pattern is The Problem - ignoring the fact that people who engage in X behaviour without problems don't turn up in psychologists' consulting rooms.

madamez, you are wanted here - we can't start without you!

You'll deny everything Madamez. Then again as your career is in the porn industry, although not as a porn performer as I understand it (so why you were getting called "lucky" earlier on is beyond me) it's understandable. You have a bias and you will deny all evidence that challenges it.

I didn't realise you were famous for going on to threads where women were in pain because of their partners' porn use and rah-rahing porn either but I guess you have to protect your livelihood. Strangely enough though, I don't think a few people on a message board, even if they are exposing the truth rather than the lies that the porn industry propagates, are going to make much difference.

And funnily enough the porn-defenders have offered the some total of nothing in the way of figures, evidence or facts on this thread. Funnily enough that doesn't seem to bother you though.

On the other hand that doctor is a professional who can report on trends he sees with his child patients.

Elizabetth: are you trying to claim that you are free from bias?

You are right ladidadi, way up there. Some are.

I think some people use the word 'bias' to mean 'firm position for or against something'

Others use it to mean 'vested interest in supporting or defending'.

You may be at cross purposes with this one.

Soph, please by this www.amazon.co.uk/gp/offer-listing/074254351X/ref=dp_olp_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1195505217&sr=1-1 Who's Afraid of Charles Darwin: debating feminism and evolutionary theory]] even if you only raed the bits about bias and biophobia

Nope, everybody has a bias, the difference is I don't have my livelihood invested in this argument as you do.

can I please warn you all that one of the posters to this thread may be very questionable - please see here for details.

Farking hell
I've just read what that idiot has written - first thing I've known about this fantasist being an escort. I think he was paying them - must have been!