Guests bringing dog to stay

[Vetyveriohohoh]

As a dog owner, if you were going to stay at someone’s house would you assume your dog would go to? Would that change if the house you were visiting also had their own dog?

DH and I disagree... need outside help please

Thanks everyone. Drip feed is its MIL and we haven’t met dog at all due to covid, DH reckons saying no will cause a massive drama, I would never have assumed in the first place. It’s a tricky relationship as is so wanted to test if I was being massively unreasonable but the majority seems to suggest I’m not.

I suspect they’ll huff and not come...

I would assume my dog is not invited (why on earth would anyone invite my dog to stay) and I would not ask if it was ok either, that is outing someone on the spot.

She may not even by plan to bring her in the first place but I think we need to be explicit before they turn up. I suspect she may though.

I wouldn't assume.

If anyone turned up with a dog then Toasty Boy Cat and Toasty Girl Cat would beat it up and make a really foul mouthed hissing noise.

I only bring my dogs if they are specifically invited. If they aren’t, either they don’t come or I don’t go!

If you don’t want it then make it clear it’s not welcome.

We don’t have any pets though have had cats in the past. In the past when people we’ve invited over have asked if they could bring their dogs I’ve said no. It’s never stopped anyone coming.

I assume he's not invited unless he's specifically mentioned.

No, I wouldn’t invite anyone with their dogs ( or any other pets) to stay in my house. I’m not a dog owner but it doesn’t change the whole approach to me. I used to have a cat and was obsessed with her tbh but never took her with me to visits/ walks/ weddings/ parties, etc.
I wouldn’t presume that my DH or DD are invited in some situations.

I think it depends on how long it is. Generally our friends know that we come with the dog as she can't go into kennels (rescue dog) and unless given far advanced warning it's very difficult to get a pet sitter.

As a dog owner I do always check first though and also if they have a dog suggest they meet outside in a large open space first! My dog was never exposed or trained as a puppy (not by us we got her at nearly 2) so she's not great at doggy social etiquette or asking nicely other dogs to play she just steam rollers in! But usually within 5 mins sorts the dogs sort it out!

All my friends and family would already know whether the invitation included the dog or not & likewise I would with them.

If DP's friends just turned up with a dog, I'd think it was a bit rude & incredibly stupid. They don't know about any allergies or whether we have a suitable garden etc. But if the dog was well behaved I wouldn't mind.

Outside of known family & friends I wouldn't assume the dog was invited & I might ask, depending on why we were going. I can't actually think of anywhere we'd be invited that I don't already know the people well enough to stay but not know about the dog situation.

Though that might be my age, maybe different when I was younger?!

Have your DH's friends just turned up wuth a dog??

For a long weekend so 3 nights I’d expect. It’s a 3/4 he drive so no turning back if the hot here and dogs didn’t get on.

To be honest( and I know this is not what you were asking) I find it annoying even on days out. If asked to join a day out with a family +dog, I'd expect it to be there, but if I organise something, only to be met with accompanying dogs I'd rather have been asked, or at least forewarned, to give me the chance of saying something beforehand. If it's a massive dog I don't feel comfortable with, I don't want to be conned into sharing it's space.

@Justmuddlingalong

I would presume the dog wasn't invited. More so if they have a dog actually.

This

No, I would only take the hellhound if he were explicitly invited but usually I leave him behind, I relish a few dog-free days.

My fil would not let us in without our 2 dogs. They sleep in a crate though and are well mannered.

@Vetyveriohohoh

Cross posted with your updates...

I suspect they’ll huff and not come...

Win/win
🥂🍾

@AlmostSummer21 if only DH agreed 😂

I would assume my dog was not invited unless it was explicitly invited. And even then I would probably not bring it.

I would ask. But if the visit wasn't for my benefit I would be quite happy to just not visit if it meant paying for and arranging dog boarding.

@easterndreaming

To be honest( and I know this is not what you were asking) I find it annoying even on days out. If asked to join a day out with a family +dog, I'd expect it to be there, but if I organise something, only to be met with accompanying dogs I'd rather have been asked, or at least forewarned, to give me the chance of saying something beforehand. If it's a massive dog I don't feel comfortable with, I don't want to be conned into sharing it's space.

But that's on you. If the location is dog friendly, why would they not bring their dog. If you have a problem with dogs that's something you need to deal with (talking to them) not assume they won't bring their dog to a dog friendly venue.

I wouldn't assume that my dog could come with me but if he couldn't it might impact on my decision to visit, particularly if it was an overnight stay as I'd need to arrange Kennels which aren't cheap or always available.

I would always check first however if my dog wasn't welcome there's a chance we wouldn't come (if I can't find someone to have him.)

It's unusual to expect dog is invited 😬 unless invitee has said bring your dog too.

I suppose you dint want dig there but husband does? Does he have a plan for if dogs dint get one, or if new dog marks territory all over the house for example

SIL did this. We had to put our cat in the cattery and pay for the privilege ?! Bonkers.

Friends' dogs no, unless invited. But family dogs, absolutely expected (unless there's a specific problem like an allergy or serious conflict between extended family dog and own pets).

It wouldn't occur to me to ask a MIL or DPs to leave the family dog at home. Dog is extended family too.