Guests bringing dog to stay

[Vetyveriohohoh]

As a dog owner, if you were going to stay at someone’s house would you assume your dog would go to? Would that change if the house you were visiting also had their own dog?

DH and I disagree... need outside help please

To ask to bring your dog would be ridiculously rude.

Ah see I just wished theyd ask so he could say no. Instead I’m in limbo.

Non dog owner - I would never consider the dog or the fact that I need to tell someone it couldn't come - I'd think it's incredibly rude to assume you could bring any animal to another persons house.

No dog would be staying here, so if asked, the answer would be no.

Yes I don’t think you can ask. It’s very rude. You are putting the most on the spot and making them feel bad if they refuse

‘Is it ok if I bring the dog?’ Is not a polite thing to say!
Just don’t take your dog. They know you have a dog. They’ll say if it’s ok to bring. Otherwise it’s just not.

Based on lots of dog experience, this would by my own option:

• arrange to meet on neutral territory “on a walk,” then just walk both dogs home, they should then be calm and relaxed in each others company.
• agree your boundaries/ house rules in advance ( not on furniture/restricted to utility room / downstairs / not on carpets as appropriate). If agreed in advance, it saves addressing awkwardly on the day.
• I would have my large dog playpen ready on standby - to restrict one dog / give one dog a break - if needed.
• I would do my utmost to make my own dog happy and secure in his own space.

Host! Not most

I'd not allow any dog in my house, but I'm not a dog owner.

I don't understand the 'my dogs are part of the family of course they should be welcome' people.

Children haven't happened for me so my cats are my substitute babies, and a massive part of my family but I bet you'd raise an eyebrow if I rocked up with 2 cat carriers. Why do people assume it's different for dogs?

@Delatron just to be clear we are the house the visitors are coming to. I wouldn’t dream of taking my dog anywhere it wasn’t explicitly welcome.

@Itgetsthehoseagain

Would not dream of bringing my dog. Anyone who assumes their dog is welcome anywhere has a sense of entitlement so out of kilter that I'm surprised they can walk straight.

Banking this - fabulous!

@Mdghteryhddhh

To ask to bring your dog would be ridiculously rude.

I don't think its ridiculously rude.. odd. Is it rude to assume children are invited? Or are they "just part of the family" and that's different?

Nope! We have a giant dog with strong guarding instincts so wouldn't be able to relax with someone else's uninvited pet at my house. Also as he is so huge I would never expect someone else to include him, unless perhaps they lived on a tonne of land in which case I might inquire but be prepared to hear a "no".

I would presume the dog wasn't invited. More so if they have a dog actually.
Same.

So in theory then I could bring my pony with me next time I visit someone? He's not too big (his back is about level with my shoulders), he could fit in a small garden if it were just for a weekend. I shouldn't even have to ask, right?

@britnay tbh as long as you don’t expect him to be on my living room carpet I think I could be cool with that

There’s a difference between assuming you can bring your dog and asking. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask, it’s just instigating an adult conversation to avoid confusion and problems.

I have zero problem with the answer being no and I’d always phrase the question as “what are your thoughts on the dog?” rather than asking directing to bring it. If they say “No” then that’s totally fine but I prefer not to put the dog in kennels so I would politely decline the invitation or consider booking alternative accommodation.

Yes sorry I know @Vetyveriohohoh it just makes me so cross when people assume they can bring or ask to bring their dogs. And I have a dog!

I still think ‘is it ok to bring my dog?’ Is rude. Your putting the host in an awkward position. They have to say ‘no’ and feel bad or feel pressured.

Let’s be honest not many people want a random dog on their house.

You’re putting

My mum brought her dog to stay for a week one Christmas, on the understanding that it wasn’t allowed upstairs as it has a history of pissing on the carpet. It once pissed on my mum’s pillow. My mum refuses to accept that it isn’t house trained. Apparently I’m just making a fuss. There was no way it was allowed upstairs. My mum’s house smells like a multi-storey car park stairwell, and I had nice new carpets.

We shut it in the kitchen (tiled floor) overnight. The first morning I had to mop up rivers of piss off the floor. The second night it barked without stopping from 11pm til 5am, at which point my husband went down and slept on the kitchen floor next to it just to make it shut up. My mum said that I was being unfair keeping it in the kitchen but I refused to let it go upstairs, therefore the only way to stop it barking was for me or my husband to sleep on the kitchen floor next to it for the rest of the week. Every time we left it, even for 5 minutes, it pissed on the floor again, day or night, regardless of how many walks it had. It also attacked my cat.

My mum said the whole thing was all my fault for not letting it upstairs (to piss on my pillow presumably). My mum slept perfectly all week as she was too deaf to hear the barking. My husband and I were beside ourselves.

No dog is ever welcome in my house again. My mum is refusing to visit without her dog. I guess I’ll never see my mum again. Fine by me. (My husband is a saint btw)

@Cosmos45 kids and dogs really aren’t in the same league.

@Cosmos45 of course kids are different. Bloody hell.

I'm not a dog owner and I'm allergic with asthma. If anyone showed up at my house with a dog I wouldn't let them in. But my family and friends know it. Even if I wasn't allergic I don't think anyone should assume their pets are invited.

I don't own any pets but since when is +dog ever assumed?!

I'm a dog owner, and would assume any invite to stay with friends would NOT include Ddog. If I thought it would be ok ,I might ask to bring him, but would be fine if the answer was no.