Feel like I’ve failed, 2 year old still in nappies

[AgnesWeston]

DS is 2 years and 7 months.
He hates the potty and won’t entertain a toilet seat cover either.
We’ve tried to talk about him being a big boy, we’ve tried to make it into a game, we’ve bought books about potties and toilet training.

He’s very bright, he recognises every letter of the alphabet already and can tell us the correct phonic sound for each one. He can count 1-10 and recognise each number individually. His speech is fantastic.

So I’m not sure what more we can do?

Thanks for reading!

Eh? I know three year olds, esp boys, still in nappies. You can try “Oh crap” if you haven’t yet, it has a good success rate, but otherwise just take a big step back and give it longer.

Most children of that age are still in nappies , potty training has absolutely nothing to do with intelligence , not that that is particularly relevant. Leave him alone and try again in a few months

I'm not sure what the problem is? My DD only started potty training about 2.5 and all of her friends were the same. She's now 3.5 and has just stopped using nighttime pull ups. Again, this is similar with her friends.
As long as they're out of them by school it'll be fine. Have you tried just letting him be naked and having the potty in the room? He'll want to go at some point.

Leave it and wait until he's older. We did my bright 8 year old when he was 3 years 2 months. So just worked out that way- we had a few holidays booked and didn't want to mess around with accidents when abroad.

As it happened he was fine in one weekend and with no accidents since. Not a single one. Straight on the toilet, no messing around with potties. For us it worked out well. I'll be waiting until a similar age with my daughter.

Mine is three-and-a-half. Nowhere near. I had a hard time with the boys, but she's stubborn as a mule and I've got so much else on that it's not a priority. I've told her she'll have to be clean and dry by the time she goes to school in September or she's not going, which has concentrated her mind somewhat.
I'm sure you'll get there, and long before he's three.

You don't be successful until he's ready, and many kids aren't potty trained until well after their third birthdays. Back off and let him go at his own pace.

won't

Too early! Just stop

Honestly, don't stress about it. He will do it when he is ready and not before. My DS who turns 14 tomorrow was just like this. My MIL was very nasty about him not being potty trained by this age. I had tried, but that happened what that both he and I became thoroughly miserable.

Wait a few months when the sun is shining and it will all be different. Keep chatting to him about big boy pants and he will get there. We went on holiday and on arrival my DS announced he was now going to wear pants. Luckily I had packed some and despite our terror that he would have multiple accidents, he only actually had one. And that was because there are no toilets in Lidl!

He’s 2!

Relax

Dd wasn’t potty trained till she was 3.5. I waited until the summer after she turned 3 (March) and let her go bare bottom. She was trained in 3 days and never had an accident. She was dry by 4 at night too

I tried the same method with ds, but he couldn’t grasp it. He was eventually trained in December, 3 months before he turned 4. He has had the occasional accident and now at age 6 he is still in pull ups at night.

Oh, come on. You know that is not an unusual age to be in nappies. Why are you rushing your child to meet milestones before he is ready?

I didn't even bother try to potty train mine until they were 3! You're doing fine!!

He's not ready. My DS came out of nappies a few days after his 3rd birthday and it took a day or two, hardly any accidents. It was a while longer before he was dry at night though. We'd tried earlier and had no joy at all. It's nothing to do with how bright they are, they are ready when they are ready. Don't beat yourself up, it's really not late, especially for boys.

I didn't potty train either of mine until they were almost three.

I'm also not really sure how being able to speak and say the alphabet helps with potty training? Surely being able to pull his own trousers up and down would be better?!

Completely normal, stop stressing, especially for a boy. DS2 didn't train until he was 3.5, his sister is exactly 2 years younger and joined in. They were both dry in a few weeks.

Why do you feel like a failure? Successful toilet training can only be done when the child is ready, physically and mentally. It is no reflection on you as a parent.

My DD (now 7) was in nappies until just before her 3rd birthday and in night nappies until she was 5.

My son (4) was in nappies until 6 months ago and is still in night nappies, though he’s starting to get the occasional dry one so I think he’s going to be ready to stop those soon.

You can’t force a child to be dry, you’re more likely to end up dealing with multiple accidents if you try too soon rather then let them do it at their own pace.

Who is telling you this is an issue. Children used to be out of nappies earlier years ago but only due to toilet timing. Not that they were toilet trained.

Oh bless you, I remember feeling exactly the same with DS! Still in nappies at till nearly 3 when all of my baby group were potty trained by two and speaking in full sentences! I remember having lots of wobbles about it! He walked at 9 months though so my mum used to tell me that’s what his energy went on!

FWIW, he potty trained fine at 3, spoke beautifully when he finally did, passed his 11+ And is now at university having a (social distanced) ball. Don’t sweat the small stuff-looking back it’s not worth stressing about and he’ll do it when he’s ready

I hope that sounds supportive and not patronising-supportive was what I was trying to do!!

Wait until the summer, he'll be closer to 3 and try again - dd was nearly 3 before we did it - tried around 2 1/2 and it was an unmitigated disaster. If you get them when they are ready, it's quicker and far easier. Plus in the summer, clothes are easier to dry.

I found with both of mine, waiting until they were ready worked and they got it quickly, rather than as all being stressed out about wee on the floor.

Totally normal at this age. What were your expectations exactly?

Kids are all different, my DSS was nearly 4 and hes bright as a button too. My niece is nearly 3 and probably the cleverest kid I've met in lost ways - shes only been out of nappies this last month and still wears pull ups to sleep. Just leave it til hes older and stop stressing

That's fine!! Some kids are still in nappies when they start school nursery. Keep trying every now and then h don't force it. A friend of mine insisted on doing her kids early and it's cussed all sorts of problems now as her children were made to go on a schedule and now can't recognise the natural signs for when they need to pay a visit

My daughter was 3. We tried when she was younger, unsuccessfully. Then we attempted again, and she instantly got it.

You know 2 isn’t late

Reassuring to hear it isn’t an issue.

My parents keep mentioning it and I know a few at his nursery of a similar age who are out of nappies already.