To expect DH to collect me from hospital?

[PierrethePenis]

I’m having a minor procedure tomorrow. It didn’t occur to me it would be under general anaesthetic. It is and I was told I had to have someone collect me and stay with me for 24 hours. Now because of covid rules car sharing with people outside your household isn’t allowed. Obviously you aren’t allowed anyone in your house either. It’s all a bit tricky so DH is the only one who can do it. He initially said he would collect me but would have to go in to work after. When I asked if he could stay with me he said no, he had an important meeting he had to be in the office for. We had an argument about it and now he won’t collect me either. I’m left taking a taxi both ways which isn’t recommended and staying on my own. Am I being unreasonable to expect him to prioritise me and my health over a business meeting, just for one day?

I work for a number of senior people and am forever reorganising meetings at far shorter notice than 3 days. As some have said it really depends on what it is, how senior he is, and his line manager's attitude. A bog standard office meeting (which I suspect it is) then either you delegate or you rearrange.

I think he's BU for not collecting you but to be fair to him if it's an important meeting I can understand him not cancelling last minute. As far as I'm aware you're allowed to have someone come in to support you for health reasons so do you have anyone else could come stay with you through the day?

On the basis of all the info you’ve given about him in this post, I would agree with you that this should be the final nail in the coffin.
He doesn’t sound kind at all.

@Clarice99 that’s a good idea. Thank you. A friend can stay with me if they me home in a taxi but if that doesn’t work out then that’s a great back up plan.

@Keepnamechangin

I had colonoscopy and DH was to supposed to pick me up, he refused as he wanted to play game. In the end he went to pick me up but he park about 2 miles from hospital as he does not want to park in narrow car park and pay money. He expected me to walk those 2 miles on my own, crossing a busy dual carriageway and huge round bound without crossings. The nurse was pissed off and asked me to hand the phone over to her. She was having none of it- when he said he parked 2 miles away. She screamed at him, made him to park right outside the clinics door and told him, she will be waiting outside personally to see him. He was there. Another time sadly about some years ago same scenario happened when I miscarried and heavily bled all over our bathroom that I could not leave my bathroom as of the extreme heavy bleeding and contracting pains. He reluctantly drove me to the hospital but again parked faraway and I walked with a bloody trail of blood screaming in pain all those miles.

I hope he is now an XH

Well I got a taxi there. Despite what the nurse said they wouldn’t let me home in a taxi. Phoned DH and explained and he reluctantly collected me. Then went in for his management meeting. Thanks for the support and suggestions.

Hope you are ok OP

Your DH sounds like an arse.

Only a handful of jobs are that important that taking a day off because their wife is having a medical procedure under GA would be difficult. Seriously what is the point in being married if you refuse to step up for your spouse whilst they are in hospital.

What an arse.

Hope you are ok.

Just before 1st lockdown he left me collapsed on the bathroom floor and went back to bed as he didn't want to be too tired for work.
That would have been the nail in the coffin for me.

Hope you’re ok OP.

Your H has no values. What a nasty selfish self-important little prick.

Management meeting. So he wasn’t pushing through with perpetual motion or a ground-breaking cure of some kind then

@PierrethePenis

Well I got a taxi there. Despite what the nurse said they wouldn’t let me home in a taxi. Phoned DH and explained and he reluctantly collected me. Then went in for his management meeting. Thanks for the support and suggestions.

What a great husband. Hope you're ok op

Glad you're okay and home safe OP.

Glad he picked you up in the end but he does sound like an utter prick OP. I don't think you need to consider whether his behaviour this time was the last nail in the coffin, he applied superglue to that lid years ago by the sounds of it.

YANBU to ask that he collect you, but you are BU expecting him to be able to rearrange an important meeting at such short notice. Just get a cab home?
I had surgery on my back at the weekend which included an overnight stay. My DP couldn’t come and meet me so I simply got a cab home.

Ah sorry just saw your update, glad you’re home and ok.

So we was able to collect you, he just didn't want to?

That isn't someone who loves and cares about you.

There are some shit husbands on here - I am shocked how callous they are.

Hope you are ok OP and hope 'D' H never needs your care