To feel like childminder gave up too quickly?

[Flickie]

My little boy (23 months) has been with his childminder for 10 months, he settled in great and has always been happy there. He does usually cry a lot on drop off but settles really quickly. In the past two weeks he's been unsettled and upset all day there, we aren't sure why, he goes 2.5 days a week and has since the start. She's text me tonight and said the last 2 weeks she's had no time to help the other kids, the whole day has had to revolve around him crying and it's not fair on the others and that we need to look for another setting for him. I'm a bit shocked she's given up on him so quickly. He was fine there for months and it seems like something we could of tried to work through rather than just giving him the boot

Nokidshere, you might be my DS’s former childminder! She was highly experienced with an excellent reputation but my son just wouldn’t settle there. She did end the contract not just for him though as she went off to do something else. He joined a local nursery and was much happier.

@Sarjest sometimes it's just the best thing to do. I'm nearly retired now after years of saying 'when x goes to such a school, that's me done'. But when 'my' last one leaves for secondary in July that's me well and truly finished.

We got fired from our first child minder after two hours 🤣

It sucks but as pp have said is probably a sign he will be happier somewhere else. I think you may look back on this as a good thing later on.

Also as he gets older he will want more stimulation and a nursery will be better for organized activities and contact with same age kids.

I've NRTWT but I'm wondering whether there might be an issue with another child.

My eldest went to a CM for a while when he was about 6months old and one day he came home with a bruise 'inside' his ear. I spoke to the CM the next morning and she said that he'd 'toppled over' whilst sitting and he must have got the bruise that way. I wasn't convinced because if what she said was true, the bruise would be on the outside of his ear, not inside. When I went to pick him up that evening, I went into the house and was chatting with the CM when I saw another child go over to my son and poke him on his cheek which made him cry. I pointed this out to the CM and suggested that this could possibly be the cause of his bruise. The CM said that it was impossible, she watches all the children (she had 6 at the time), all the time and she would have seen if this had happened. This child was actually being fostered by the CM so I couldn't even speak to his parents and the CM was adamant that the child was innocent. I went home and told my husband what I'd seen and he said that he wanted to go and talk to the CM but shortly after this, literally an hour after I'd arrived home, the CM called me and said that because of my accusation, she was terminating our contract immediately and refused to work the notice period. I was left in the lurch and spent the following 3 days (not going to work) searching for another CM.

So, I hope you can either sort things out with your CM or that you will find a better, more reliable CM that your child will be happy going to.

Ok.
I’m a childminder.
No let has ever seen a registered childminder smoking around their mindees. That isn’t illegal. Registered childminders aren’t even allowed to smoke in their own homes...as it’s a workplace.
Childminders work hard loving and nurturing YOUR children, for quite frankly a pittance compared to other people’s wages.
CHildminders have a ratio of 1:3 for under 5’s. With only 1 under 1 at any time.
They undertake paediatric first aid everybody 3 years, safeguarding every 2 years, ofsted inspections alone and in their own homes every few years, along side lots of other EXPECTED CPD regularly. THey track your child’s development and have the knowledge to further it and notice gaps.
IT is horrible to read so many uncalled for comments about childminders on here, and if any of my parents said any of these things I would would furious. It’s downright nasty, when you all obviously don’t know anything about childminders.

OP, the childminder has done what she thinks is the right thing for your child. She hasn’t done anything wrong and she’s think thinking of your child and the others her care.

Autocorrect.
That is illegal.

@saffy2
IT is horrible to read so many uncalled for comments about childminders on here, and if any of my parents said any of these things I would would furious. It’s downright nasty, when you all obviously don’t know anything about childminders.

Shame my CM didn't consider my baby's wellbeing when she allowed her 3.5yr old foster child like him hard enough to leave a bruise!

Aarrghh predictive text.....

Not "Like him"..... "poke him"

Children can get unsettled for for all sorts of reasons. A miserable child for long periods of time can be absolutely draining - I used to be a nursery nurse before having DC. If your son is monopolising her entire day at the detriment to the other children in her care; I think she was right to bring this up with you and advise that you seek other arrangements.
Sounds like your LO needs one on one care. Can you look for a nanny? This option might be better for him.

He was in childminders today on the notice period and was back to his usual self. He cried loads on drop off but I got a text 15 minutes later with a picture of him happy as larry and he was playing and happy all day after. She said if he keeps this up then we can call off the notice. We will see I guess.

@Flickie I think she sounds really crazy - how unsettling for you! Would you be able to trust her after this?

It is odd. Toddlers go through so many funny little phases and I knew she was giving up too quick and he proved it by snapping out of it.

@Flickie

It is odd. Toddlers go through so many funny little phases and I knew she was giving up too quick and he proved it by snapping out of it.

Personally if it was me I would be investigating and putting on other waiting lists for nursery or other CM as if she has done it once it's likely next clingy phase will repeat!

Sounds like he doesn’t like it. Even if he settles when you’ve gone it doesn’t mean he’s ok. I had this experience in kindergarten with my son and I wish I’d just taken him out after a few months of morning tears. It was totally wrong there for him and ended badly with me feeling awful for putting him through it and not listening to him.

I agree with both previous pp

Keep your eyes open on this op and do start exploring other options