AIBU coffee run

[Starstella21]

Please settle a light hearted argument...

Our coffee machine is broken, my partner has got in the habit of making a 10 minute walk in the morning to the local french bakery to grab a coffee.
I've asked if he will get me one he says he doesn't want to carry two back...

AIBU to think this is selfish?!
I want a coffee!!

If he only likes to carry one at a time, then he can go back and get his coffee later, can't he?

@Starstella21

Tbf he does usually make me tea and breakfast in bed each morning

But when it comes to ensuring the tiniest bit of hassle for you He says no.

It’s not good OP

@Starstella21

Tbf he does usually make me tea and breakfast in bed each morning

That’s besides the point, he specifically goes out to get himself a treat that he knows you enjoy too, but won’t carry one home for you. It’s just normal behaviour to think if your partner too in this situation. If the situation was reversed would you carry one home for him?

Tbf he does usually make me tea and breakfast in bed each morning

That puts a slightly different slant on this then.

Can you not walk there with him?

That’s awful he’s definitely not your partner. I’d think it was off if a workmate was going and gave that excuse not to get me one and they aren’t supposed to love and support you.
I’d just look after yourself from now on and let your housemate sort himself out he’s made it quite clear how he sees you. Maybe when penny drops for him have a sensible discussion if not well you know where you stand.

He makes you breakfast when it’s easy to do so but the second he has to put in a little extra effort in he is all about himself. It says a lot about how he views you, unfortunately.

He makes you tea and breakfast each morning! That puts a different spin on it. He goes to lots of effort for you already. Why don’t you go with him for the coffee? Or take turns? Or why don’t you get him coffee?

Surprised nobody raised the ‘clandestine phone call’ opportunity yet ... but seriously, he probably wants to drink some of his coffee on the way back.

Much more enjoyable to have your own 10 minute walk when he returns, while he holds the fort.

Ew, no thank you. And you are pregnant? What a jerk.

That's very mean of him, but your coffee would be pretty cold after 10 minutes.

That would be the end for me! How selfish. If my partner could only manage one he'd insist I had it or we'd share.

@Lollypop701

I’m petty... stop doing something for him😂 but not ok tbh

Was thinking the same. I'm so petty though. No I didn't make you dinner as I didn't want to cut extra chicken. No I didn't wash your clothes with mine as I didn't want to bring extra clothes down. So petty 😂.

Get a cafetière and decent ground coffee to keep you going - cost of one coffee trip!

I think this post has reminded me why I need to delete Mumsnet again 🤣

He is a very good partner and dad who does a lot for me and the kids daily and there is a lot of love in our home and in our relationship. I don't feel that he doesn't value me at all and maybe you all think I should but I honestly don't 🤷‍♀️ He makes me breakfast in bed on our days off always.
I'm not going to reevaluate my whole relationship/worth over coffee but thanks all for your input 🤪🤪

what a twit. Coffee shops usually provide a little cardboard thing that enables a person to carry two cups in one hand.

OP: Our coffee machine is broken

Two posts in: Why not just buy a coffee machine

Oh mumsnet.

Oh right OP, so you start a thread to complain about your DH, people respond, and somehow it's our issue ?

Ten mins is actually quite far to carry a second hot coffee. It would turn a pleasant stroll sipping a coffee into a chore carrying the second and getting back while it’s still hot. I can see why he wouldn’t want to tbh.

@rookiemere

Oh right OP, so you start a thread to complain about your DH, people respond, and somehow it's our issue ?

Yeah I mean this is what I'm talking about...

I was going to say you should reconsider the relationship, if my dh went somewhere to get something, he would get me something that could be kept for later even if I didn't ask.

But seeing as he makes you tea & breakfast in bed everyday, this walk is probably 'his' time to get some quiet time and the coffee goes in with that. If you want coffee, go yourself separately to him.

All your OP said he was refusing to bring back a coffee for you. No detail about what a prince of a man he is in other ways, so I agree with the previous posters who suggested he was not a nice person. Why did you ask?

@Starstella21

I think this post has reminded me why I need to delete Mumsnet again 🤣

He is a very good partner and dad who does a lot for me and the kids daily and there is a lot of love in our home and in our relationship. I don't feel that he doesn't value me at all and maybe you all think I should but I honestly don't 🤷‍♀️ He makes me breakfast in bed on our days off always.
I'm not going to reevaluate my whole relationship/worth over coffee but thanks all for your input 🤪🤪

Ok, but most people agreed with you and said it was selfish so 🤷‍♀️

But seeing as he makes you tea & breakfast in bed everyday, But he doesn't! He makes it on their days off!

Mine does too. And if we have run out of coffee one of us walks up to get 2 cups from the early opening newsagent that has a machine that does good enough coffee.

If either of us brought back a single cup the other would be rightly pissed off. Not wanting to carry 2 cups is a daft excuse!

To be fair though, lighthearted or not, your husband does sound like a prick.

Unless we’re anticipating a drip feed whereby he only has one arm....