To be beautiful?

[Mindgoneblanko]

Aibu to want to be beautiful and to wonder what it must be like to be beautiful and know you’re beautiful? How does it feel, if you are?
Have you been aware of having more opportunities in life, people being nicer to you etc, based on your looks, or has it been detrimental in any way?
For the record, I’m not hideous, ok I’d say or was when younger, but definitely not highly attractive/very pretty/beautiful

[Primark872]

Yeah you look older, but can still look young and attractive. There are a lot of things that can be done to get rid of or prevent fine lines ln

[KeeTcat]

@Sarahtrue11 I know that I'm beautiful, but I keep quiet about it. I have come across a few women who I've thought don't really realise how attractive they are, or maybe they do but choose to keep it to themselves like me.

[Drunkenmonkey]

@Nats1984. Edward scissor hands on crack

[CuriousSeal]

I would say that I'm beautiful, just based on what I've been told. There are definite up and downsides. I modelled in my teens and when people at my school found out I was bullied. I generally tried to hide away at school for an easy life and I focussed on my education. I did notice that other attractive girls at school relied on their looks and aren't in a good place now but I guess it's hard to know either way.

To be honest, I adapted to the creepy guy approaches pretty fast. I didn't lack confidence in that respect and I was quite happy to give them the middle finger 😂. The downside was that no 'nice guys' ever seemed interested until I met DH at 18 in my first year of uni.

I think my looks help with my job, my clients and my employer is definitely slightly biased. Some female colleagues have been jealous.

The worst thing for me is that men I consider friends often seem to disappoint me down the line. My DH and I have a group of couple friends and all of the men in this group have started a private chat on Whatsapp with me at one time or another that led to attempted flirting. I'm not afraid of making it perfectly clear that I'm very happy in my relationship at this point though, but it does make me slightly cynical about the world and love in general. I know that my male friends probably weren't looking to full on cheat, but why am I to be used to stroke egos just because I have more value in their eyes as an 'attractive' person? Even an old lecturer started messaging me after I finished university. I genuinely thought he wanted to discuss my degree subject at the time. More fool me.

[rarari]

I think Angelina Jolie is breathtakingly, I've seen her in real life. She's another level.

Pretty’ imo is a word used to describe a far larger number of attractive/nice looking women. Lots of women are pretty in my view but, beautiful I’d reserved for only the most attractive, which are few and far between imo

To me beautiful has an elegance, a refinement which is probably why I think it stays as you age & actually I think it comes a bit later in life eg late 20s. Pretty is youthfulness & inoffensive if that makes sense.

[DenisetheMenace]

Looking back at photos, I was. Not too shabby now, 30 plus years later but time catches up with all of us 😁

I’m quite glad I didn’t have a clue at the time tbh. Most people I’ve known who were aware of their beauty were a PITA.
I couldn’t believe it when in my very early 20s I was asked out by a reasonably well known male model (early 90s).
I said thank you and goodbye after 3 dates because he was amongst the most boring people I’d ever met, completely self-obsessed. Couldn’t walk past a shop window without checking himself out.

[TableFlowerss]

@rarari

I think Angelina Jolie is breathtakingly, I've seen her in real life. She's another level.

Pretty’ imo is a word used to describe a far larger number of attractive/nice looking women. Lots of women are pretty in my view but, beautiful I’d reserved for only the most attractive, which are few and far between imo

To me beautiful has an elegance, a refinement which is probably why I think it stays as you age & actually I think it comes a bit later in life eg late 20s. Pretty is youthfulness & inoffensive if that makes sense.

I agree. I also agree with Angelina Jolie being beautiful. She’s the epitome of beautiful, particularly in her hay day. She’s far more than ‘pretty’ imo. You don’t see many people that look that that!

[DenisetheMenace]

To me beautiful has an elegance, a refinement which is probably why I think it stays as you age & actually I think it comes a bit later in life eg late 20s. Pretty is youthfulness & inoffensive if that makes sense.“

Tend to agree.

Clive James said that a woman wasn’t beautiful until she was at least 30 (it was a comment of its time, I’m certain it wasn’t sexist). I think I know what he means. People need to grow into themselves.

[Wellpark]

I have found that being thought of us attractive (other people saying things along those lines to me, not my own assessment ) has brought out the jealous bitchy streak in quite a few women I have encountered in my personal and professional lives. I'm a bit slow on the uptake and was frequently puzzled and hurt by the bitchiness. Looking back now I'm older and wiser I see it for what it was. Jealous people often let envy get the better of them and give in to nastiness.

[TableFlowerss]

@Primark872

Yeah you look older, but can still look young and attractive. There are a lot of things that can be done to get rid of or prevent fine lines ln

Please do share as thats the Bain of my life at minute 😂

[the80sweregreat]

Angelina Jolie is stunningly beautiful but I believe she was fairly ordinary as a child and was bullied for looking a bit different?
Hey dad was also v good looking!

[Sarahtrue11]

@CuriousSeal

I would say that I'm beautiful, just based on what I've been told. There are definite up and downsides. I modelled in my teens and when people at my school found out I was bullied. I generally tried to hide away at school for an easy life and I focussed on my education. I did notice that other attractive girls at school relied on their looks and aren't in a good place now but I guess it's hard to know either way.

To be honest, I adapted to the creepy guy approaches pretty fast. I didn't lack confidence in that respect and I was quite happy to give them the middle finger 😂. The downside was that no 'nice guys' ever seemed interested until I met DH at 18 in my first year of uni.

I think my looks help with my job, my clients and my employer is definitely slightly biased. Some female colleagues have been jealous.

The worst thing for me is that men I consider friends often seem to disappoint me down the line. My DH and I have a group of couple friends and all of the men in this group have started a private chat on Whatsapp with me at one time or another that led to attempted flirting. I'm not afraid of making it perfectly clear that I'm very happy in my relationship at this point though, but it does make me slightly cynical about the world and love in general. I know that my male friends probably weren't looking to full on cheat, but why am I to be used to stroke egos just because I have more value in their eyes as an 'attractive' person? Even an old lecturer started messaging me after I finished university. I genuinely thought he wanted to discuss my degree subject at the time. More fool me.

Yes, I had that feeling of men using me.

Several times, men would be very nice and kind to me. And then I find out , duh!, they only want me for sex.

Like for example, I started in a new workplace. I had moved to a new city. A new male colleague went out of his way to show me around, be kind to me, ask me out for drinks after work with a group of people he already knew, as he didn't want me to be lonely in a new city. Then a month later, he tried it on with me , and I said no. Instantly his nice guy act dropped, and he was pretty nasty to me.

I had another long term male friend, who was very sweet and kind to me, and eventually, I realised he wanted to have sex with me. When I wasn't interested in that, he also immediately changed from being supportive to being awful.

I have this feeling of, no man is ever really nice to me, just to be nice and kind to me, they are all looking for something

[rarari]

She’s far more than ‘pretty’ imo. You don’t see many people that look that that!

The event was filled with "beautiful people" & she stood out by a mile. I think I actually had an open mouth 😆

[XingMing]

I've never been Beautiful but remain fairly symetrically faced at 64, and yes, you are treated differently. I've never been so gorgeous as to have been treated horribly by other women from jealousy, but I do notice that there's interest from older men (65+ nowadays) and that young handsome men instantly tolerate me like a favourite aunt. It's a totally human reaction, based on reproductive instincts and health status. Of my close friends, while I am not the youngest, I am the only one that doesn't take a single tablet every day.

[Sarahtrue11]

Yeah, Angelina is truly stunning. She is unusually good looking.

[Sarahtrue11]

Pity that poor Angelina has the same marriage troubles as a lot of us!

[rarari]

People need to grow into themselves.

Yes this is what I mean, I remember a photographer said my face would settle at 28, which at 18/19 I was like ? but looking at photos from those periods he was right, my nose kind of thinned a bit & my cheeks slimmed.

[JudgeJ]

@WorraLiberty

Threads like this tend to bring all the Samantha Bricks to the yard and you can guarantee they won't have a shred of posting history between them 😁

That's a name from the past! Is she still around? Wonder how she and those like her have coped with all the beauty places closed!

[Sarahtrue11]

Didn't Angelina Jolie also say that she has no female friends at all, because women are so jealous of her.

I remember reading that.

[HappySwordMaker]

My 6 year old foster daughter is beautiful. We’ve been in some uncomfortable situations before - strangers touching her, asking what race she is, photographing her. Infuriates my protective husband. It has become so common that family/friends/strangers on the street comment on her looks that I’ve asked those who we are close to to please praise her on something other than looking like Snow White - her progress at school, sporting abilities, creativity, kindness to others - anything but her physical beauty. Her looks may change as she gets older, or she may think being beautiful is enough to get through life. And I worry how she will feel when she starts to age. Weirdly though, if she was a - ahem - “plainer” child, I wonder if I would spend my time telling her she’s beautiful?

[rarari]

Angelina also has that thing of being able to look sexy & beautiful, like Michelle Pfeiffer

[Ohnomoreno]

Nobody know what it's like not to be them, do they. Or whether their looks have influenced outcomes. I viewed as very pretty, and I would like to think that my success is solely my achievement, but it's hard not to wonder if it's skin deep I suppose.

[TableFlowerss]

@rarari

She’s far more than ‘pretty’ imo. You don’t see many people that look that that!

The event was filled with "beautiful people" & she stood out by a mile. I think I actually had an open mouth 😆

I think I would if I seen before in RL 😮😮😮

[TableFlowerss]

her

[Spuriously17windows]

I have a friend whose DH is proper movie star good looking, just stunning. She ended up dreading going out socialising as the attention was unreal - she once had a woman interrupt their dinner, turned to my friend and said sorry about this and handed her phone number to her DH. She couldn’t see the funny side of it and the night was ruined. She has plenty of similar stories, she hates it.