To be beautiful?

[Mindgoneblanko]

Aibu to want to be beautiful and to wonder what it must be like to be beautiful and know you’re beautiful? How does it feel, if you are?
Have you been aware of having more opportunities in life, people being nicer to you etc, based on your looks, or has it been detrimental in any way?
For the record, I’m not hideous, ok I’d say or was when younger, but definitely not highly attractive/very pretty/beautiful

Off to look up Samantha Brick....

The thread about ' which male celebrity do you like ' which comes up now and again is telling as women find less attractive men interesting or fascinating ( I mean , Benedict Cumberbatch is just weird, but women on mn adore him)
Are women more open to personality , quirkiness, rather than just looks?
Anyway, I do wonder what it's like to be stunning. I bet it has its down sides. That's what I tell myself! Lol

Throughout my life I've been everything from unattractive, through to invisible, through to very attractive.
I'm currently very attractive according to other people. This is due to how I have my hair, my weight, shape, and how I dress.
Facially I'm ok, pretty enough, with no major issues other than looking older, but definitely not beautiful, and without flattering hair or if I was fatter, which doesn't suit me, I would be very plain.
Given I've been both attractive and not, I can say with confidence that being attractive makes my life far nicer in every possible way.
It's really the best of both worlds, attractive enough for the advantages but not so stunning that you get the disadvantages.
I can also say that being very attractive is achievable for most women if they want it.

Ah ha I've had the symmetrical face comment! I must admit I was quite chuffed. The lady I clean for told me she'd love to paint me as my face is symmetrical. I declined as I'd absolutely hate to sit still while an artist scrutinised my face.

I find "ordinary" looking people often have a well developed sense of humour which I find more attractive than anything else. Maybe they have to try harder to be successful socially? The old cliche that beauty comes from within is definitely true I think.

Obviously, we can't generalise. I mean beautiful people aren't just one homogeneous group.

I don't know any truly beautiful people.
A friend that I have, who has all the benefits and attention and admiration, both male and female, is the opposite of beautiful.
She has bad skin, she's overweight, she's got badly done piercings and belches loudly, dresses badly. She's just got an excellent personality. One of the guys, gamer and music nerd. Knows what she's talking about whenever she speaks.

Nooo. Symmetrical face can't be backhanded, can it?😂
I thought that's like an ultimate beauty!

"We are all our own kind of beautiful "
I think like many things in life if you were considered to be beautiful, and you could well be OP, you would be disappointed.
I do not consider myself to be beautiful,, l am ok with how l look, but looks are not a priority for me.
I think confidence , kindness, humour and empathy are attractive qualities, and they don't fade.

How can you ever really know that you are beautiful, and you haven't just been told that by people to make you feel good?

When I was younger I was considered to be very beautiful. Some girls would tell me that they wished they had my looks etc.

This is my honest experience.

It made my life a total misery. All older women were horrendous to me. I don't remember anyone being kind to me as a teenager. People like my uncle's wives, and my own aunties who were just starting to age past their prime (40's to 50"ss) were absolutely vicious to me. Like, it was a serious level of abuse. Any time, that they saw me, they would be horrible to me. My two female cousins, who were not as good looking as me at the time, were cruel to me all the time.

Girls everywhere were awful to me. I remember being in a dance class when I was 16, and all of the other girls refused to talk to me. This happened to me so many times. The level of nastiness and hatred directed towards pretty girls is awful.

Another time, I was 25 and working in an office. There were five women working there, who were the same age as me.They would be nasty to me every day, and all go out for lunch without me. I remember sitting in the office at lunch one time, and a much older woman, who was nice, came over and talked to me. She told me that the women were jealous of me.

I had levels of that all my life.

I am older now, and still a very anxious person because of it. I remember most of my life being ruined by other women.

That's sad that people can be vicious to you if your very good looking. I don't understand this mentality at all.

@Moonface123 Of course those are higher qualities, without a doubt, I just wonder how it must feel to wake up beautiful, for everything to look amazing on you and everyone to look at you

Well beautiful is subjective but I think I'm generally quite pretty. Even as I age & put on weight lots of people compliment me on my face. I used to do modelling & honestly some people would love me & some thought I was plain so you certainly learn it's subjective.

I do think people are generally nice to me which may be my looks or because I'm a positive person, hard to say.

@katienana

How can you ever really know that you are beautiful, and you haven't just been told that by people to make you feel good?

I read a Dawn French interview where she said that since she was a small child, her dad told her she was beautiful everyday. She attributed a lot of her self confidence to that. I think it's wonderful if people tell you you're beautiful.

I’ve always been told I’m beautiful, I’m 26 so still young. I don’t know if it’s because I look young (I get ID’d for the lottery still which is ridiculous), or because I’m tanned.

I’ve found I get what I want, especially with men. They’re willing to bend over backwards to help. My husband calls it “Damsel in Distress” and uses me if his car breaks down or to get a better deal.

However, people have always assumed I’m “stuck up” and if they take the time to know me they usually comment how I’m different than they expected.

I am incredibly insecure and measure everything by looks. So feel incredibly threatened when I am “against” someone (I naturally compare myself to every woman). I hate it. I am not exceptionally attractive either, I’m just above normal average but below the beauty amazement average.

No, it's super annoying. No one earns their face...

No idea why I opened this thread, I’m a right munter

I've never had a problem making female friends but loads of my friends got far more attention from men then I did particularly when I was younger & a bit lanky.

@katienana

How can you ever really know that you are beautiful, and you haven't just been told that by people to make you feel good?

I think if you get told a lot, by lots of different people, men and women including strangers, then you probably are. If you only ever get told by your mum and best mate, it might be just to make you feel good.

Got a couple of objectively beautiful friends, my sister is also very beautiful (maybe not as objectively but she's very attractive).

What can I say... they're not happier and they too feel insecure sometime, maybe not about their looks but about their personality and their ability to be appreciated for who they are.

I'm very much average, decent but not a head-turner and god its a blessing.
I mean, sometimes I'm like "I'm the ugliest thing alive at this very moment and I wonder why no one is throwing rocks at me", but most of the time, I just don't think about it, also because no one makes me think about it, I feel like people who like me like me because of what makes me me.

Yeah sometimes would be nice to be beautiful and to get a lot of attention and to get men at my feet and...well no actually it sounds awful, I take it back.

Another great thing about not being beautiful: Aging is easier, you've got less to lose.

I have a very very beautiful friend at work. People often assume she is stupid and she hates men falling all over her. It's difficult going out with her for a drink or something to eat because men are literally always approaching her.

@Sarahtrue11 So sorry for your experience, i don’t understand how people can be that cruel, must be jealousy. I guess that’s the side I haven’t seen..with having a couple of beautiful friends I’ve only really seen the opposite, people dote on them and just want to be around them. I realise part of it is their personalities, which are awesome, both smart, funny, kind people..but lots of people I know are and they’re not looked upon and treated in the same way.

I think people are drawn to confidence more than anything. I'm not a munter but I'd never be classed as beautiful or even pretty. I'm a bit quirky with a nice smile. I'm overweight and don't wear make up (late 30s). People still gravitate towards me at work functions and on nights out. Or even to randomly chat too on public transport, cafes etc. I'm comfortable in my own skin and I (hope!) a nice easy going person.

I have a friend who is overweight, not what if class as pretty as such. But exudes confidence and friendliness. On nights out she's literally beating guys off who are drawn to her. She's just got a fab way about her.

The thread about ' which male celebrity do you like ' which comes up now and again is telling as women find less attractive men interesting or fascinating ( I mean , Benedict Cumberbatch is just weird, but women on mn adore him)

Shows how subjective it is! BC is awful imo, although a good personality can be very attractive.

No, in a way I feel sorry for the strikingly beautiful as they have to fend off creeps everywhere they go.

Sarahtrue11

That's so sad x