Just buy a bloody child lock and take some responsibility for your own child!

[takeresponsibilityforyourchild]

Probably being massively U here, and I am fully expecting to be flamed.
So I don’t drip feed- we moved into our house around 18 months ago and at first we said hello etc to our neighbours two doors down with little to no response.
We have had two interactions with them since.
First was neighbours two large Labrador type dogs running up my drive barking and jumping up at my mum. Neighbour found this funny, understandably my mother didn’t.
The second time was during the first lockdown they were drinking at the end of my drive with another neighbour until 3am. Twice my husband very politely asked them to keep the noise down to be met with a torrent of abuse. They left broken glass and a spilt drink which stained the drive, our other neighbours cleared this up. Since then they have completely blanked us.
So already I do not like these people, which may be clouding my judgment.
We live on a new-ish estate with speed bumps.
I was going EXACTLY 15mph down the road and pulled up at my drive with my two year old in the back. As I got out the car neighbour said when you pull up on your drive can you go slower because my child (who is a similar age to mine) can open the door.
I said no, I won’t.
To which she started to raise her voice, I didn’t do this as I had my child with me. I asked her if she had a child lock on her front door and suggested that if she doesn’t she should get one to prevent her child from getting out. By now the woman is ranting and raving at me in the middle of the street. I can be quite firey when provoked and only kept my cool because of my child.
Couple of points as to why I won’t change the perfectly acceptable way I drive.
I was going 15mph, way below the legal speed limit and reasonable for a residential street. If she’s that bothered she can write to her local councillor and ask for them to change the speed limit.
They have been nothing but rude to my family since we moved in, why should I do anything for them?
Every time I pull up they’re sat at the window looking out, instead of sitting at the window all day concerning themselves with what others are doing, maybe they should pay more attention to their child who can apparently get out.
I have taken safety precautions to prevent my child coming to harm including safety locks, a chain on the door and baby gates around the house, why can't they do this?
She made a request that I slow down, I declined, I believe I am perfectly reasonable driving onto my property at 15mph. Neighbour seems to think that this was a command and I should bow down.
Why do they think it’s my responsibility to make sure their child is safe instead of them?!

I suspect she’s on here (hi neighbour) as she has a child around the same age as mine, and this is massively outing, so name change and all that.

Also I can provide diagrams of drives if necessary!

@TrojaninTroy

It sounds as though you responded to this neighbour because of their previous & ongoing behaviour. But you have to carry on living next to them and, as others have said, your response has made a bad situation worse. Would you have replied in the same vein to neighbours who had given you no trouble in the past? And suppose, just suppose, their child did get onto the drive just as you were turning in, ever so slightly too fast. Would you feel better then?

That's a pretty big assumption to make. That the toddler will escape, will wander in the road at the exact time OP is driving AND that she will hit him.

I think people have not read the post correctly, the neighbour didn’t complain about her doing 15mph driving on the road, she complained about the speed pulling into her drive. From the description it sounds like there is some type of shared drive access or it often involves crossing the pavement, both things that involve killing your speed. Difficult to know from afar but obviously situation not helped by neighbours poor behaviour in the past

I think the neighbour needs to brush up on her parenting skills. Why would a parent knowingly have a door that a toddler can open and get out of and then do nothing about it?

Very simply solution, have a latch/bolt at adult head height

Are we all reading the same thread? The neighbour is an obnoxious twat who left broken glass on OP’s drive and has generally been antisocial and rude. If she’d asked me to slow down she’d have got a lot more than a ‘no’, I’d have told her she had a bloody nerve after leaving hazardous rubbish on my drive and that if she expects consideration she might want to try showing some. Why on earth should OP fawn over an ignorant idiot just to ‘be nice’?

It's a bit sad though, don't you think, to be fighting for your right to drive at 15mph even if you could actually slow down or at least say you will.

The thing is, it's fine for PPs to say that, reading it on a screen and having time to think about it. The OP was taken by surprise, which is when you don't necessarily come out with the best reply.

And to clarify, the OP was driving at 15mph. That is not the speed limit, which is higher, so she was already driving considerately.

@Feedingthebirds1

It's a bit sad though, don't you think, to be fighting for your right to drive at 15mph even if you could actually slow down or at least say you will.

The thing is, it's fine for PPs to say that, reading it on a screen and having time to think about it. The OP was taken by surprise, which is when you don't necessarily come out with the best reply.

And to clarify, the OP was driving at 15mph. That is not the speed limit, which is higher, so she was already driving considerately.

Which might make sense except she has them come on here and gone on and ON about how right she is and why she's so pleased with herself for asserting her "right". I'm bit suggesting the neighbour sounds great or evwn reasonable, the point is you don't have to stoop to being an arse just because your neighbour is. Ugh it's all so petty and unpleasant. Why don't people try to get along. Of course small children should not be outside unaccompanied but we all know that accidents happen. That's why the driveway and entrances are the most common scene of toddler road deaths.