What would you say if partner made you this offer

[Thenanny23]

Put yourself in this scenario-

Childless married couple, your OH has invited a (single sex) group of friends to stay at your house to celebrate a friends birthday.

They suggest that you might want to not be in the house over the weekend as it may change the dynamic of the gathering and may be noisy/irritating for you.

They offer to book and pay for you to stay in an Air B&B in the nearest city centre for 2 nights.

Would you be offended by the suggestion?

I knew it wouldn’t be long before ‘sex workers’ were mentioned.

@ButIcantsitonleather

I knew it wouldn’t be long before ‘sex workers’ were mentioned.

me too

Odd. How old are they? After a certain age not wanting your mate's partner to be around is a bit childish. I would be worried they would trash the house.

Pretty standard. If everyone else has kids it’s harder for them to decamp. With Covid it’s easier to organise at a house. Having a someone to disturb in the house is a pita. I’m 40’s... if we arrange a girls night in then partner de camps to his mates etc. We’ve never had sex workers to a girls night... although have chatted complete shit till 4am and danced in my pjs... wonder what I’ve missed!

I think overnight is probably a bit odd. I've made myself scarce a bunch of evenings before when DH has had friends or cousins round (all the cousins are blokes).Went out with friends or visited my family. They are usually playing D&D hah. I can't imagine staying somewhere else overnight just for this but then we'd never have the money to just throw it a random Air BnB, and my DH isn't much of a partier.

Tbh, I would say, 'you lot go to the hotel'.

It sounds like, because an Airbnb has been mentioned, that OP is planning a weekend with her female friends and she is going to suggest her partner might like a few nights away while it happens. I imagine, if he’s anything like mine, he won’t mind a bit.
I can’t imagine any men in my life, be it my H, his brothers, my brothers or my male friends, would choose to be the ones at home, if they could be the ones having a night away on the lash.

I would love this! Time away in a hotel, good food, lots of reading, films and wandering around, bliss!

I wouldn't mind but I know if my OH and his mates did this they'd be no ulterior motive other than them not wanting me to see them being drunk idiots. If you're a bit unsure in your relationship though I could see why you'd be suspicious and uncomfortable with it.

They’d be told to get fucked

Incredibly. That would never happen in my house.

@Wellpark eh?! How did you get sex workers from that op?

You wouldn't see me for dust tbh. I'd love it.

Hard to call, depends on the relationship you have. I'd be ok leaving my hubby with a couple of his male friends for the weekend because I trust him. Is it you wanting to stay with two female friends who are in a couple and shipping the hubby off or is he wanting you to go so he can hang out with his same sex couple friends in peace?

Will you come back to mess, trashed kitchen, stains on the carpet from spills & a bathroom looking like it's been invaded by students?

I'd tell him to book the air B&B for his gathering & I'd enjoy a peaceful weekend in my clean & tidy house.

@Wellpark

Not an effin chance!!! Sounds like they are planning to have sex workers round. Sorry but it's dodgy af!!!

It really doesn't 😂

Hell fucking no! Sit tight and do not move out of your home. ‘Change the dynamic...?!’ Do fuck off. To your own homes.

No! I'd love that idea

This is so strange, why is the birthday person not hosting own birthday, or rather than paying for a hotel for you they get an air b n b for the party. If you were to take it at face value I would ask that you return to a sparkling house, but I suspect that this group want to do things they know are wrong/you will disapprove of and ruin the fun, or only one person is coming and it is a date.

I’d be absolutely delighted. Although to be fair I’d have probably gone and left him and his mates to it without needing to be asked, let alone bribed.

Why don't they get the air bnb and you stay at home. If I was leaving then I would want a hot tub or hotel with spa at the very least!

I’d love this! I frequently have a group of girlfriends over and DP always makes himself scare. He doesn’t want to be sat there making awkward small talk while a group of drunk women complain about their dwindling sex lives or discuss boob jobs 😂

@honeylulu, I think they are - it's the OP's partner, isn't it?

No it definitely says a friend's birthday. Friend can host everyone and have his own house messed up and send his own partner away!

I'm perhaps a bit invested because my husband's best friend is a total hellraiser who used to try and send me away from my own flat so he could watch football and get pissed with H without my stifling female presence. One time was boxing day and it was freezing! He got pretty short shrift from me and his excuse was that "women shouldn't rule your life".

The punchline: he couldn't host his boozy football viewing sessions at his house because he still lived with HIS MUM.

Not an effin chance!!! Sounds like they are planning to have sex workers round. Sorry but it's dodgy af!!!

😂😂😂

Ahhh I love mumsnet

If it was my partner having his mates round, I'd love it. Great excuse to get some peace and quiet.

If it was the other way round, he would hate it 🙄