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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What would you say if partner made you this offer

497 replies

Thenanny23 · 07/04/2021 22:23

Put yourself in this scenario-

Childless married couple, your OH has invited a (single sex) group of friends to stay at your house to celebrate a friends birthday.

They suggest that you might want to not be in the house over the weekend as it may change the dynamic of the gathering and may be noisy/irritating for you.

They offer to book and pay for you to stay in an Air B&B in the nearest city centre for 2 nights.

Would you be offended by the suggestion?

OP posts:
waterlego · 09/04/2021 21:28

The only time someone's trashed my flat during a drunken party it was me

😆

Maddison12 · 09/04/2021 21:28

That would be an unresounding no from me, no-one is kicking me out of my house so they can have a party. Also agree with pp who said does it not make you suspicious why your OH want to oust you from your own home.

waterlego · 09/04/2021 21:30

I’m genuinely dismayed that so many people would be suspicious if their OH suggested they might want to be somewhere else while a boys’ night took place. I had no idea so many people were in relationships with people they can’t trust 🙁

BadNomad · 09/04/2021 21:31

Haha so much drive-by posting.

Read the opening post (but only the opening post)
Respond (based on assumptions and bias)
Leave and never return (or return and realise you were a tit but keep silent)

Chanjer · 09/04/2021 21:32

Would jump at the chance, get a mate along and probably get some sex workers in ffs Grin

Sunshinesky1981 · 09/04/2021 21:33

Am finding this far funnier than I should. Just goes to show that lack of information and bothering to read updates doesn't stop people from having strong opinions Grin

I think he should leave the cow. Soon as he's out the door her and her mates will be swigging vodka , swinging tampons round their heads while singing im a survivor

SchrodingersImmigrant · 09/04/2021 21:34

Also agree with pp who said does it not make you suspicious why your OH want to oust you from your own home.

Hmmm. Good point. Op should say what she is planning🤔
I am running out of stripper gifs

Sunshinesky1981 · 09/04/2021 21:37

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Also agree with pp who said does it not make you suspicious why your OH want to oust you from your own home.

Hmmm. Good point. Op should say what she is planning🤔
I am running out of stripper gifs

The way a lot of women on MN seem to veiw men and their husbands im betting a crochet your own vodoo doll class would go down a storm
SchrodingersImmigrant · 09/04/2021 21:40

The way a lot of women on MN seem to veiw men and their husbands im betting a crochet your own vodoo doll class would go down a storm
😂😂

CustardySergeant · 09/04/2021 21:43

Yes, this thread has managed to be irritating, funny and depressing all at the same time!

psychomath · 09/04/2021 21:45

In all seriousness I would mind if I was the one getting kicked out but only because I've always been good friends with all my partners' friends. If they(/you) were inviting people I hardly knew I'd be extremely grateful for the opportunity to escape! But would probably choose to stay with a friend instead.

waterlego · 09/04/2021 21:49

swinging tampons round their heads while singing im a survivor

😂

Campervan69 · 09/04/2021 21:52

Maybe set up some hidden cameras before you go. Then I'd book a luxury spa break with some friends.

Campervan69 · 09/04/2021 21:53

Oh just read OP update.... maybe scan the house for hidden cameras before you get the male strippers round 🤔

SleepingStandingUp · 09/04/2021 22:01

@Liketoshop

When is this meant to be taking place exactly as assuming it'll be late June onwards re easing out of the global pandemic etc etc. Is be furious that my home was set to be taken over so you have bargaining chips here.... Spa weekend for you, no expense spared. Home to be cleaned as though they've never been there. Thirdly bin your partner. You deserve better.
Better than a partner who likes spending time with their mates and wants to do something nice for one of them, and who is willing to put their bank card into you having a good time too?
SleepingStandingUp · 09/04/2021 22:08

@waterlego

I’m genuinely dismayed that so many people would be suspicious if their OH suggested they might want to be somewhere else while a boys’ night took place. I had no idea so many people were in relationships with people they can’t trust 🙁
It's really sad isn't it?

DH would sit up talking comics and movies, they'd drink too much beer, I'd be a BIT worried about vomit, I'd give him time to get over the hangover. It wouldn't occur to me they'd download porn (more likely Marvel movies), invite over prostitutes, take drugs, have a sex party, trash the house etc. I'm married to a grown man, not a teenager.

Maddison12 · 09/04/2021 22:17

Haha so much drive-by posting.

Just goes to show that lack of information and bothering to read updates doesn't stop people from having strong opinions

On the off chance any of that was aimed at meGrin yes I only read the first page before I commented, sorry about that!

waterlego · 09/04/2021 22:28

@SleepingStandingUp- yup, exactly.

My OH and his mates would drink heavily, eat kebabs, watch football, maybe play beer pong and dance around like twats to 90s music. They might smoke a few fags in the garden if any of the naughty boys had brought some along. Their voices would get progressively louder over the course of the evening and they would drape themselves over each other slurring: ‘I fuckin love you, gumbo’. In the morning they and their beds would all stink of alcohol and they would sit around blearily eating a fry up. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Unless I was drinking too, I would find all of that a bit irritating and wouldn’t be able to get to sleep so would be better off in a nice quiet space where I could please myself for the weekend!

SleepingStandingUp · 09/04/2021 22:29

Unless I was drinking too, I would find all of that a bit irritating and wouldn’t be able to get to sleep so would be better off in a nice quiet space where I could please myself for the weekend!
Absolutely. No way do I want that crawling into bed and snoring all over me 🤣🤣

waterlego · 09/04/2021 22:30

Exactly!

di2004 · 09/04/2021 22:56

Odd, in fact it’s very odd indeed.
Has he not grown up yet?

Mummyyyyyyyyyy · 09/04/2021 22:58

I would be annoyed that I wasn't asked if my home could be used in this way before the arrangement was made.
Why can't the group go to one of their houses to have the party?

SchrodingersImmigrant · 09/04/2021 22:59

@di2004

Odd, in fact it’s very odd indeed. Has he not grown up yet?
I think he grew up about 47 hours ago when OP updated.
SleepingStandingUp · 09/04/2021 23:00

@di2004

Odd, in fact it’s very odd indeed. Has he not grown up yet?
No, OP is in fact very immature and wants to throw an Ann Summers party in crack whilst he's away
SleepingStandingUp · 09/04/2021 23:02

@Mummyyyyyyyyyy

I would be annoyed that I wasn't asked if my home could be used in this way before the arrangement was made. Why can't the group go to one of their houses to have the party?
Surely the same applies to any of them though, why anyone's house? Central location? Space? Willingness to host?
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