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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU For not wanting people to let there dogs jump up me or my children?

208 replies

ILoveMyMonkey · 03/04/2021 18:14

Why do people let their dogs jump up into children’s faces and then use the excuse “but it’s only a puppy” as though that justifies it!
Prime example today, nice country walk with Dh and DS8 minding our own business. Stop to look at the view and this dog comes trotting over. Immediately heads for DS who does not like dogs at all. He stands still and the bloody thing leaps up him inches from his face. I stick my leg between him and the dog so it’s now leaning on my leg and move my leg away from DS to kind of use my leg to lever it away - did not kick or injure it at all. Owner comes over after a few mins and moves dog away with her. Then mutters under her breath about me kicking the dog. I told her I didn’t kick the dog and it shouldn’t have jumped up at DS to which she trots out the age old line of “it’s only a puppy!” So put it on a lead until you can control it then.

Why don’t these people ever just say sorry my dog jumped up at your kids face! Rather than blaming you for simple being there!!!!

Grrrr rant over.

OP posts:
Fucket · 03/04/2021 20:10

If I see a bouncey dog, playful and wanting to jump up on me or the kids and the owner is oblivious or lax at controlling said dog, I usually shout at the dog, “no! Get down!” In an authoritative way I would have done with one of my own dogs (sadly all in doggy heaven). If the owner tries to say they’re only playing, I usually reply with “well I don’t want to play with your dog and I don’t want my clothes getting mucky.”

Once a man told DH to Fuck off because he asked him to control his dog who was scaring our children by chasing them around the park whilst they were on their bikes. I said to DH “why didn’t you tell him to go and fuck his dog instead as he seemed to think he was so bloody wonderful.” But then I’ve always been quick to retort and one day I’m sure it’ll get me into more trouble but hasn’t just yet.

Original poster
ILoveMyMonkey · 03/04/2021 20:11

@Ohpulltheotherone no I didn’t berate the woman consistently, she muttered under her breath about me kicking her dog, I said back it shouldn’t be jumping up, she said it’s just a puppy, I said well put it on a lead if you can’t control it. End no conversation.

Sorry to all those who have also had bad experiences- it’s really not ok that these owners give the genuinely responsible owners such a bad reputation.

@SomewhereInbetween1 yes I did know that but it’s nice to vent. Maybe if there were more responsible dog owners there wouldn’t be so many threads about the inconsiderate ones.

@1Morewineplease I totally agree with you. I’ve never let my DS approach any dog to stroke it - it’s dangerous and having grown up with a dog that really didn’t like kids (other than the 3 it lived with) I’d never encourage that.

OP posts:
Diamondella · 03/04/2021 20:13

Totally 100 percent with you on this one

Lorieandrews · 03/04/2021 20:14

Oh yes. Dog can’t recall. Don’t take it off a lead

My child is really frightened of dogs. Purely due to a man who let his dog push her over and scratch her face. He was excited. But that’s it. She’s now terrified

I’ve had a man when I asked him to recall his dog say. She get that fear from you?!? We’ve fostered dogs for over 20 years. She used to love them.

So so bad and people do it allllll the time. It seems the general consensus is that kids love dogs. Well mine doesn’t and it blights our walks all the time.

LolaSmiles · 03/04/2021 20:16

Evidently YANBU. Hardly anyone is going to come on the thread and say "oh you should be jumped all over".
It's just another opportunity for people to argue that society revolves around dogs and that most dog owners are irresponsible.

Original poster
ILoveMyMonkey · 03/04/2021 20:20

@LolaSmiles no, not most, just some.
TBH I think there are a lot of rude, inconsiderate, self entitled people out there who think that them and their needs/wants trump that of everyone else’s. I wish people would just think a little bit more - be polite, be respectful and not be so selfish all the time.

OP posts:
Lorieandrews · 03/04/2021 20:26

@LolaSmiles

Evidently YANBU. Hardly anyone is going to come on the thread and say "oh you should be jumped all over". It's just another opportunity for people to argue that society revolves around dogs and that most dog owners are irresponsible.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-56617182

And there’s another thread about dogs needing to have stricter regulations

HowManyToes · 03/04/2021 20:26

I don’t have kids but I am a dog owner. I’m sick to bloody death of off lead dogs approaching us. My dog is quiet and timid, he loves meeting other dogs but he hates it when they jump in his face and he backs away.

I’m absolutely done being nice and polite about it - when I get the inevitable “ oh it’s ok, he’s friendly” or whatever I shout back “ I don’t care, recall your dog , it shouldn’t be approaching strangers” I’ve had lots of raised eyebrows, tuts, a couple of ‘miserable cow’ and the like. I couldn’t give a shiny shit, I just want to walk my dog in peace without having to deal with these morons and their incompetence.

For what it’s worth I think all dogs should be on leads in all public places.

LolaSmiles · 03/04/2021 20:29

IloveMyMonkey
I didn't mean you said that, more it's likely to end up yet another thread full of people making that argument.

It's like dog thread bingo on most of these threads. By page 10 someone will have mentioned that they're always having their picnics stolen, someone else will insist that all dogs should be on a lead because they consider too close to be a dog minding it's business half a field away, someone else will probably engage the hyperbole of how they're positively shaking with fear and hyperventilating at the mere sight of a dog (but despite this apparently debilitating phobia they repeatedly opt to go places known for the presence of dogs, something someone with a real phobia wouldn't do), usually a few posters will decide that the mountains of dog poo is proof that the majority of owners don't clean up their dog poo (without thinking that common sense suggests several million dogs would create a hell of a lot of poo).

FWIW, I used to be scared of dogs & am now a responsible dog owner.

Yummymummy2020 · 03/04/2021 20:30

People are idiots. I like dogs but I absolutely hate this. And the it’s only a puppy line. Some people are so selfish! I find this especially bad at the duck pond, the dogs want the bread out of the babies hand and come running! We had one owner ask my one and a half year old to stop throwing bread from the buggy as it attracted her dog which was off a lead and trying to jump into the buggy. I was so annoyed!!!

BrilliantBetty · 03/04/2021 20:35

YANBU! A dog as jumped up on me two separate times today.

The first a big brown lab or similar in the car park of a nature reserve, as I was getting my baby out her car seat. No apology from owner.

Second, a smallish spaniel off lead in the town centre jumped up at me and DC6 who was holding hot fish and chips. I took the fish and chips and it then jumped at me. Again no apology from owner who was trailing some way behind it.

It's not good enough.

BrilliantBetty · 03/04/2021 20:41

When are dogs allowed to be off lead? Are they supposed to be off lead at all in parks or along pavements?

Original poster
ILoveMyMonkey · 03/04/2021 20:57

@BrilliantBetty I would say when they have good recall and can be trusted not to approach other dogs / people.

OP posts:
Jammysod · 03/04/2021 21:03

YANBU. DS hates going to the park for this reason.
I am sure your dog is only playing/wants to say hello, but it can be bloody terrifying & hurt when a dog jumps up at you.

PrincessPopple · 03/04/2021 21:06

YANBU!!! Hate this!!

Moonface123 · 03/04/2021 21:06

This is why l walk my dog miles from anywhere, it's just so much more enjoyable. My dog hates interaction with young kids, and l can't hear the fuss if we have to walk past someone with terrified kids. It ruins out walk too.

Moonface123 · 03/04/2021 21:07

Bear the fuss.

AuntieMarys · 03/04/2021 21:11

That's why I have a walking pole

therestissilence · 03/04/2021 22:28

@LolaSmiles

(but despite this apparently debilitating phobia they repeatedly opt to go places known for the presence of dogs, something someone with a real phobia wouldn't do)

Haha, this one always makes me laugh. How far gone some of you are! The suggestion that dogs hold priority in public spaces, and that it's humans who should make way.... you really couldn't make it up.

LolaSmiles · 03/04/2021 22:42

Haha, this one always makes me laugh. How far gone some of you are! The suggestion that dogs hold priority in public spaces, and that it's humans who should make way.... you really couldn't make it up.
The funny thing is you're totally missing the point.
I wasn't saying humans should make way. Grin

But thank you for ticking another one off my bingo list where some people think apparently the whole world revolves around dogs.

I was pointing out the hyperbole and lack of logic on here from people who:
A) sit on mumsnet claiming they are shaking with fear and positively stop functioning at the mere sight of a dog who is nowhere near them and minding their own business,
But also
B) apparently can't help but be regularly in places where there's known to be dogs existing

It seems a bit strange to me that anyone with such an apparently debilitating phobia that they can't manage to exist in a public space with other people who are minding their own business
would regularly go places that are full of the very trigger that sends them into a shaking spin of fear.

It's not about humans making way for dogs. It's about some people making absolutely no sense.

welcometo2021 · 03/04/2021 22:52

I own 2 dogs and it's really starting to do my head in too. The other day I had left my garden gate open while I nipped out to the car and the gate opens onto an alley. 2 huge dogs (German shepherd and a St. Bernard) just randomly strolled into my garden, no owners in sight! When I eventually found their owners and said something they just laughed at me. Luckily my toddler and my 2 dogs weren't in the garden but I just couldn't believe the total lack of apology. I love dogs but it baffles me when people just don't seem to be even remotely interested in paying any attention to what their dog is doing or totally
Lack understanding that not everyone loves their dog?!

Trying2310 · 03/04/2021 22:55

YANBU. I have a 10 year old who is terrified of dogs. He rarely leaves the house for fear of them off the lead. We went to a nature reserve that specifically says dogs on leads and he is ok with dogs on leads. But lo and behold some entitled owner believed they didn't need to follow the signs and my autistic son had a huge meltdown in fear. It makes it so much worse when they owners say 'oh he won't hurt you, he is very friendly' . This is absolutely no comfort to my distressed child. There are plenty of people out there who are very frightened of dogs.

Dogscanteatonions · 03/04/2021 22:56

I got jumped all over by a big lurcher type - scratched my arms and thighs badly and tore my top. All the while the woman was saying "she's only a puppy" I told her she needed to control her dog and she said she wasn't trained yet she's only a puppy - what was she supposed to do? I swore at her to put it on a fucking lead then. So many elderly people walk in that particular path - thankfully it didn't happen to one of them.

Springchickpea · 03/04/2021 23:06

@ILoveMyMonkey it’s not you! It’s a complete nightmare at the moment, every tosser out there seems to have got themselves a lockdown puppy that has no recall and is allowed to roam unrestricted on a walk. I have had to give up walking with my children in the large urban park at the end of our road because I cannot take the stress of two small children hysterical as they are besieged by dog after dog, and I cannot take anymore rows with owners about what the definition is for an ‘out of control’ dog and their responsibilities as a dog owner. It has become so stressful that my 6 year old is practically agoraphobic; I can’t get him to leave the house other than to go to school without at least 20 minutes committed protest. He is so distressed at the thought of encountering another bloody bounding puppy.

LolaSmiles · 03/04/2021 23:12

Dogscanteatonions
The dreaded 'O' word is infuriating. 75% of the time when the word "only" is used it is used to minimise poor dog ownership.

I find with my middle to larger sized dogs that we encounter smaller, poorly trained dogs who come begging for treats off me, and by begging I mean jumping around my ankles/calves and yapping. My response to anyone who use the phrase "only small" as part of minimising their dog's lack of control is point out that I doubt they'd be excusing the same behaviour from my dogs.