AIBU For not wanting people to let there dogs jump up me or my children?

[ILoveMyMonkey]

Why do people let their dogs jump up into children’s faces and then use the excuse “but it’s only a puppy” as though that justifies it!
Prime example today, nice country walk with Dh and DS8 minding our own business. Stop to look at the view and this dog comes trotting over. Immediately heads for DS who does not like dogs at all. He stands still and the bloody thing leaps up him inches from his face. I stick my leg between him and the dog so it’s now leaning on my leg and move my leg away from DS to kind of use my leg to lever it away - did not kick or injure it at all. Owner comes over after a few mins and moves dog away with her. Then mutters under her breath about me kicking the dog. I told her I didn’t kick the dog and it shouldn’t have jumped up at DS to which she trots out the age old line of “it’s only a puppy!” So put it on a lead until you can control it then.

Why don’t these people ever just say sorry my dog jumped up at your kids face! Rather than blaming you for simple being there!!!!

Grrrr rant over.

And I say that as an experienced, responsible dog owner.

Well yes I agree. I am a dog owner and it does happen unfortunately.
I have two small children and my dogs are therefore very accustomed to kids, they rarely jump up but can get in the way sometimes.

Something happened to me recently where I had my two dogs off the lead and they ran up to and barked at a man coming out of a dark alleyway, wearing a hat and a big coat. They were spooked, not aggressive but did bark a warning.
I IMMEDIATELY apologised and went to put both on leads. He made a comment about them being under control - they were under control but seeing a dark figure emerging from an alley with no noise or warning they were clearly reacting in a totally usual way, not out of control AT ALL.
Again I apologised and he continued to make snidey remarks even when I had them back on leads and heading in the opposite direction.

Literally no harm done at all, there was no aggression just a 5 seconds of a bark.
Even if he got a shock, I apologised immediately as I appreciate it might startle someone who is not used to dogs. But my apology wasn’t enough.
I personally don’t like men skulking around in black coats and hats and hoods in the dark but hey, I have to live with that bc it’s part of our accepted culture. The same as pet dogs are.

So no I don’t think yabu to want an apology if it does happen. So long as you then don’t continue to mouth off at the owner.

My youngest was recently knocked over by a dog who’s owner then said well it is a beach that allows dogs- yes, doesn’t mean they can do what they please.

My eldest was bitten by a random dog in a park not so long ago. Totally unprovoked the dog ran over and bit his leg.

@FrenchBoule

DS still has a scar on his nose. He landed flat on his face on the pavement when the dog jumped on him. Apparently “the dog was just being friendly” and I was a mardy cow asking the owner to recall the dog. Dog shit... don’t get me started on it.

Just like @poppycat10 said, the cult of a dog.

Mental.

I would have actually called the police about that.

Section on 'out and about with your dog'.
www.pdsa.org.uk/taking-care-of-your-pet/looking-after-your-pet/puppies-dogs/dog-laws-for-owners

www.gov.uk/control-dog-public

OP, yanbu.

I haven’t heard the puppy excuse but “oh he’s just friendly” is the favourite excuse round here where every other bugger has a dog and half of those are off lead in public places and prone to running at you and jumping. I hate it.

DH asked me how I’m going to stop toddler DD being scared of dogs like I am. I told him I’m not. A level of apprehension around out of control animals who could do you serious damage in the “care” of selfish, irresponsible idiots is very sensible.

We have a big problem with dogs off the lead here. To the point that if my garden gate isn't closed properly, one particular dog will walk straight in and the owner doesn't notice. My youngest who is 3 is now scared of dogs because there have been so many that come right up to her. I'm not always able to pick her up and stand between her and the dog in time. Nothing has happened, she just doesn't like them invading her space, but she screams and cries which obviously isn't a good reaction to a dog either.

One man told me that I need to teach DD not to be scared of dogs because dogs can smell fear and "the big staffies will have her"

Funnily enough, its the owners of "the big staffies" and similar sized breeds that are always very responsible here, always dogs on leads and giving us space when we walk past. Its the owners of the cute little fluffy breeds who "wouldn't hurt a fly" that are left to go wherever they like.

YANBU! I have one DC who was jumped up on as a toddler and is now terrified of dogs. My other DC is ok with them, but had a dog run up to her the other day, she stood still, and the owner only decided to call it back when she started to cry!! Why??!!!!
And don’t get me started on the idiot who tied their dog up next to the gate at the park the other day, so that everyone who went through the gate got lunged at, and the dog almost got caught in the gate every time! There are some absolute idiots around.

@Smeds yes, I hate it when people say your child needs to be braver and get used to dogs being around. Funny enough my DC would be fine with dogs running around if they didn’t have the fear that they would jump up on them. I would say that means the responsibility is on the owner rather than my children. There’s only one reason my DC is scared of dogs, and it’s not irrational.

I’m a dog owner and I dislike dogs jumping up at me. My DDog did jump up a few times when a puppy but I always apologised and would then put her on the lead.
It really annoys me when owners shout out, oh he’s only being friendly. I have friends who are terrified of dogs and the fact they’re friendly doesn’t really matter.
So no, YANBU, the dog owner you met today should have a rethink.

I am sorry this happened to you. One of my DD is terrified of dogs even now and she’s a young adult because of 2 family members dogs and a few incidents.
It has left a life long fear. I am so angry with myself for not being stronger and trying to keep the piece instead of standing up to them more at the time.

My Father in his 80’s only yesterday had a dog jump up at him from behind while walking in a country park. The owners said the usual ‘he’s just being friendly / really soft / won’t hurt you etc....
He was so shocked he didn’t say anything but it could have knocked him over - so selfish and ignorant of the owner I cannot believe they let the dog jump up at an old man !

I'm sick of it. I walk on the beach almost every day. And every. single. time. dogs are allowed to run off lead, well away from their owners and some run right at me, some jumping up and clawing my legs. The owners don't call them back, nor do they apologise. Some also allow their dogs to crap all over the beach and don't pick it up. They ignore signs which tell them they are not allowed dogs on the beach.

We do indeed live in the age of the cult of the dog.

Oh my god don't get even get me started. Fucking dogs everywhere! You can't get away from them these days. Our local park is basically unuseable if you don't like dogs. Even the park that had a sign saying 'no dogs' is full of dogs.
I used to love dogs and now I hate them. I don't want my DC scared to visit the park, I don't want to be sniffed at or have my food licked or have to have DH standing on dog patrol in order to have a family picnic because my DS sits there in fear, commenting on every dog he sees.
And no he isn't unnecessarily anxious. He has had a massive dog jump up and knock him over before. If I could ban dogs completely I would but at the very least they should ALWA YS be on leads.

Add in that I am highly allergic. If the dog touches my skin I break out in a rash that I then have to live with while the dog owner trots away acting like no harm has been done.

Because, OP, we live in the age of the cult of the dog.

God, just this.

My best friend is always sad about the fact that her mum isn't interested in her grandchildren (i.e. my best friend's children). Barely engaged. All the while, my friend has to respond politely to constant WhatsApp photos of her mum's dog - 'oh isn't he adorable', etc etc.

It really is fucking weird.

YANBU, but I suspect you know that. Thanks for starting yet another thread that has a go at dog owners though 👍

I hate this. I have two dogs. I'm fanatical about not letting them near anyone. If we're around people they are on the lead, even though I know one of them can be trusted not to go near others i also know that other people don't know that, so they're both always on the lead around people.
It works the other way too though, a little 2 or 3 year old ran up to me with one dog on lead and yanked his tail really hard. I moved his hand, said it wasn't safe, that the dog might be frightened and bite (I'm 99% he wouldn't but you never know) and his mum caught up around this time and said “he's just playing"....

I’ve got a dog who is mainly walked on a lead. There are a couple of places where it’s safe to let him off, but if anyone appears either without a dog or their dog is on a lead, mine gets called back and put on his lead immediately. It’s just good manners. Not everyone likes dogs and not all dogs want to be harassed by a small, nosey spaniel.

@Ohpulltheotherone hold on so what was this guy doing wrong exactly? He was wearing a coat and hat and walking out of an alley? Unless he was homeless I assume this alley leads somewhere. No wonder he was scared of two aggressive dogs start barking a 'warning' at him! Do you have any idea how scary that would be if you don't know the dog? What if it had been a small child? You clearly weren't actually sorry as you still think it's his fault for being there. They should be on leads.
It's these kind of issues that get people riled up about dog owners.

Totally agree...

A few years ago, when my DD1 was about 3, we were walking along a little nature path and she was on her scooter which had a squeaky horn on it.
Out of nowhere, this little French pug type dog came running out of nowhere and started continually jumping up at her and barking in her face. It would not let up. My DD had been a preemie & was small for 3 so when the dog jumped up it was literally by her face. She was absolutely petrifed.

I picked my daughter up (who by this point was crying hysterically) and held her up as high as I could. I kid you not but this dog was jumping like it was on a trampoline and continued to try and jump up at her. I shouted out for the owner (who I could not see) to come and get the dog under control. The owner eventually strolled over to us from about 150-200 yards away, and by the time he reached us (dog still jumping and barking at my daughter) I was livid!

The owner told me the horn on the scooter had probably set the dog off. I told him if that was the case, he should have had the dog on a leash and under control as the path was by a primary school and frequently used by young kids on scooters. At the very least, he should have come over straight away when the dog run off if he suspected the dog had run in the directed of the horn sound.

The owner didn't apologise at all and had the cheek to tell me we needed to calm down and could not understand that having a dog jumping and barking in a child's face wasn't that bad because it was only for 'a few minutes' and it's not like he had hurt my DD . The thing is, those few minutes were the start of what became a big fear of dogs for my DD who would cry whenever she saw a dog.

Slowly but surely, with the help of a friendly and patient 3 legged dog that befriended her, she overcame her fear although now, at 8, she is very cautious around dogs.

Dogs are the reason I dread picnic season. We had food licked or stolen twice last year. I lost count of how many other dogs visited us without, thankfully, getting to food. It's made my youngest really nervous of dogs as they are frequently unpredictable offlead in our area which I think is really sad as he's usually an animal fan.

Yes YANBU OP! A few weeks ago, 4year old DS and I were walking in a park, minding our own business and this bloody labradooodle ran my son over. He fell down and all the owner could do was that 'oh he' s so excited, just being a darling' twinklig laugh shit. No apology whatsoever. I said they should put their dog on a lead, they just kept twinkling and allowing their dog to run amok, no apology or attempt to control him. I was so annoyed. Even writing this, I annoyed again!

I'm going to derail this by saying that I'm fed up of parents telling their toddlers /young children to 'go and stroke the lovely doggie' when I'm out with my dog.
My dog doesn't like young children, he cowers and hides behind me, yet parents expect me to cajole him to be pleasant to their children 🙄

And yes, I was badly bitten by a dog as a four year old and my , then, 3 year old daughter was knocked over by a large breed and mauled. ( Thankfully not badly.)

I can see both points of view.

I have two dogs and totally agree with you. One dog is a notorious jumper upper so is on a lead at all times. I've had random dogs jump up and push my children over and the owners just chuckle. So inappropriate.

I'm so fed up with this. DD absolutely adored seeing dogs when she was in her buggy, which has quite a high seat. Since she was walking enough to get out, she's had so many strange dogs run up and get in her face that she's now absolutely terrified. I hate "just being friendly" - friendly is a two way street, and DD perceives absolutely nothing friendly in a strange dog approaching her.

Some highlights:

• the guy who told DH it was his fault for having snacks in the bottom of the buggy

• the dog with no owner in sight who circled us with two other dogs in the forest and then jumped up and put his paws on my pregnant bump. Fucking terrifying as an adult never mind the two year old. Afterwards, DH said he'd had a run in with the owner before and she told him that it's fine, they're therapy dogs for children with autism.

• the one who ran right up in DD's face while on a lead! One of those stupid long retractable leads.

@1Morewineplease I don't disagree with that and I doubt most posters would. Children should leave dogs alone and dogs should leave other people alone. People should be able to just go for a walk in peace without being harassed by a child or a dog.