Double standards on mn.

[thatwasme22]

This week so far:

1. I have seen various posters defend Caroline Flack for having issues. Maybe she did but then the same argument would not be made on Chris Browne.

1. A thread on the physical attractiveness on male politicians. Imagine a male forum did this on females.

1. A thread with a woman hiding her inheritance from her husband and encouraged to do so by many posters and him being called financially abusive for being sensible over money. When men do this on mn it's all ltb.

Am I missing something? I call myself a feminist so am pro equality and that's how I raised my kids but why is this not being called out on mn?

[quote Knowingitsallover]@Pumperthepumper we may target programmes but we don't go around saying all are this we accept its the minority [/quote]
And nobody says that about men either. Literally nobody says all men. Nobody.

@Pumperthepumper well you obviously haven't read some of the threads on here recently
There is a post on this thread saying you may know one or two ok men basically are you choosing to not read them and just be selective

@Pumperthepumper

OP, you're defending men. But they're indefensible. Knowing the odd one who seems to be a reasonably decent sort doesn't mean the patriarchy has nothing to answer for

So this isn't basically saying all men on this very post ???

[quote Knowingitsallover]@Pumperthepumper well you obviously haven't read some of the threads on here recently
There is a post on this thread saying you may know one or two ok men basically are you choosing to not read them and just be selective [/quote]
Post it then, let’s see the link where there’s a huge amount of posters saying AllMen and that’s become a massive issue in society i the same way misogyny has.

Where do you live where the sex of attackers is equal? Loads of people will be interested in studying that place.

And:

What’s the magic signal the bad men give off?

[quote Knowingitsallover]@Pumperthepumper

OP, you're defending men. But they're indefensible. Knowing the odd one who seems to be a reasonably decent sort doesn't mean the patriarchy has nothing to answer for

So this isn't basically saying all men on this very post ??? [/quote]
That isn’t saying all men, it’s saying there is an issue with the patriarchy doesn’t end because you know some nice men.

I completely agree with number 3. If it’s the one I’m thinking about then it actually really annoyed me. It may have been another as there have been a few, equally as annoying and morally wrong though.

@HeyDemonsItsYaGirl

FFS I've fallen momentarily for another MRA thread. We seem to be having an invasion at the moment.

We do indeed.

This thread is thinly-disguised NAMALT. A mere five posts in and the OP's hand is very quickly shown: and so are you going to use this to tar all men?

Feminism centres women.

Bingo cards at the ready and calling 'house' in 3, 2, 1 ...

Women need to stick together, not pull each other apart.

Judging by how they are on here that isn't happening. Women have always pulled each other apart.

@CarolVordermansBum

*I don’t get what you think is wrong in either of those examples*

It was literally the same people saying no oral, no relationship, who will not give oral sex. How can you not see the double standard.

If you have to tell bare-faced lies to support your point, it's not a point worth arguing.

We absolutely do. We look at who’s most likely to be recruited into terrorism, for example. Or who’s more likely to carry a knife. Then we make programmes and guidelines and target those people to reduce the likelihood of them getting into that kind of trouble

👍

Totally agree OP.
But most people on MN are totally blind to it and are much more ignorant than they would like to accept

@Pumperthepumper it clearly says knowing the odd one , please don't treat me like an idiot I have clearly read what some have said , it may not agree with your narrative but doesn't make it true all the same , you have addressed one part of the sentence and not the other conveniently

@Chanjer do we accept that its wrong to say all these people though or is that ok

[quote Knowingitsallover]@Pumperthepumper it clearly says knowing the odd one , please don't treat me like an idiot I have clearly read what some have said , it may not agree with your narrative but doesn't make it true all the same , you have addressed one part of the sentence and not the other conveniently [/quote]
That’s not true though, which part of the sentence didn’t I address? But even assuming we’ve read the same post differently, how about answering some of these questions now:

1. where do you live where the people who attack others are of equal numbers according to sex?

2. What is the special magic signal the bad men give off?

@Pumperthepumper I don't need to post it find it yourself its been all over where its said all men on post hence why some moaned about it
Where I live is non of your business and my posy never said it was equal it said if I was out walking alone I would be wary of all as you don't know how any would behave and gave examples or recent attacks being by a group of young mixed teens one on a women and another on a man.
Don't put words in my mouth
From looking at a man i can't tell who is good or bad on face value , but once I get to know more about a person I can then spot red flags

@Pumperthepumper the part where it says you may know the odd one ? Odd one implies majority are not no ? Or does odd one mean something different in your world

[quote Knowingitsallover]@Pumperthepumper I don't need to post it find it yourself its been all over where its said all men on post hence why some moaned about it
Where I live is non of your business and my posy never said it was equal it said if I was out walking alone I would be wary of all as you don't know how any would behave and gave examples or recent attacks being by a group of young mixed teens one on a women and another on a man.
Don't put words in my mouth
From looking at a man i can't tell who is good or bad on face value , but once I get to know more about a person I can then spot red flags [/quote]
That’s nonsense though. Nobody says all men are anything. Because that’s ridiculous.

What often comes up on these posts is what All Men, all of them, can do to help stop male violence. Not just against women, but against other men too.

So if you were out walking alone at night and a man was walking behind you, you’d get to know him a bit before you decided to be scared?

[quote Knowingitsallover]@Pumperthepumper the part where it says you may know the odd one ? Odd one implies majority are not no ? Or does odd one mean something different in your world [/quote]
Does it mean every single one?

@Pumperthepumper yes putting the odd one does pretty much mean all or the majority as you well know and there have been posts that have said all men end of and there is double standards on here at times as shown in this thread re: commenting on looks
No of course if I was out late at night I would be wary of who is behind me but nowadays I wouldn't assume It was safe if it was a women either , I have no way of knowing someones intentions
All i can do when out is follow as many safety guidelines as possible , would i trust a strange man probably not in general but then again I have been broken down at side of a road and it was only men who stopped to help , obviously I wouldn't get in their car, but when one handed me his phone to call for help , I used it .
I was once offered a lift home by a man and women whilst at a bus stop ? i didn't know them and refused the women being in the car didn't make it feel safer for me to accept the lift

[quote Knowingitsallover]@Pumperthepumper yes putting the odd one does pretty much mean all or the majority as you well know and there have been posts that have said all men end of and there is double standards on here at times as shown in this thread re: commenting on looks
No of course if I was out late at night I would be wary of who is behind me but nowadays I wouldn't assume It was safe if it was a women either , I have no way of knowing someones intentions
All i can do when out is follow as many safety guidelines as possible , would i trust a strange man probably not in general but then again I have been broken down at side of a road and it was only men who stopped to help , obviously I wouldn't get in their car, but when one handed me his phone to call for help , I used it .
I was once offered a lift home by a man and women whilst at a bus stop ? i didn't know them and refused the women being in the car didn't make it feel safer for me to accept the lift [/quote]
Well, we’re going to have to agree to disagree that the definition of ‘majority’ as the opposite to ‘the odd one or two’ means ‘all men’. Although you know it doesn’t.

But even if it did, even if some posters were saying ‘all men are rapists’, which they’re not, what’s the societal issues we’re seeing as a result of that? Where is this man-hating having a wide-reaching effect on society, in the same way women-hating is?

do we accept that its wrong to say all these people though or is that ok

No because it'd be wrong.

If you're gonna counter with "but posters say it's all men" then no, no they don't, even your example doesn't say that.

the part where it says you may know the odd one ? Odd one implies majority are not no ? Or does odd one mean something different in your world

It means a limited sample isn't the sum of the problem

Gosh, that’s terrible. Do you also notice the “double standards” (for it to be a double standard, it has to be the same poster by the way, women aren’t a hive mind) on here when they’re against women? Maybe you should post about them too, so that it doesn’t look like YOU have double standards?

@BlackberrySky

The trouble is that MN is not one single homogeneous mindset. It has several million users, and different people respond to different threads.

Exactly. I really don’t understand people who are surprised that they can find radically different opinions on here.

Since I doubt people are really so stupid that they actually believe all MNers are going to have the same/similar opinions on everything, I can only conclude that OPs like this are deliberately goady.

Those pointing out it’s different posters are missing g the point. Yes it is, but it’s about double standards being tolerated, supported, not called out across mn as a whole. You can say something about a man, and about a woman, and get very different responses (yes from different posters) but it’s more that this is accepted and there’s a broad culture

I’m not articulating this well so as an example, if there’s a thread where someone comes into money. Those who advocate keeping it all pipe up if it’s a woman. Those who advocate sharing it all pipe up when it’s a man. The keepers don’t post when it’s a man and the sharers don’t post when it’s a woman