I tutor for the 11+ in an area where there are no grammar schools, but most secondary schools are dire and the few that aren't are massively oversubscribed and / or have tiny catchment areas or entry based on a lottery. Some parents, especially those of children with SpLDs such as dyslexia, or are not NT, want to send their children to one of the many local private / independent schools as they feel that their child will benefit from the smaller class sizes and pastoral care. Children who may be considered 'odd' by their peers in the state system can often thrive in a more academic atmosphere which would be considered uncool in some state schools.
A child with excellent maths and English skills stands a chance of gaining entry to one of these schools without tutoring if their parents have the time, ability and money for resources to teach their children verbal and non-verbal reasoning for the exams. Schools simply do not have time in the curriculum, nor the inclination, to teach these skills. 11+ candidates also need to have resilience, organisational and study skills, which I teach as part of the preparation. A fairly average-to bright child can do very well if they have the right attitude and work ethic, much better than a very bright child who is lazy or unprepared.
To clarify, I was an upper-working class child of European immigrants who passed the 11+ back in the 1970s in my home city. I went to a Catholic convent, direct grant, single-sex girls' school, run by nuns, which was an absolute nightmare for my mental health, but great for teaching girls they could be anything they wanted. It took me several years to sort myself out, though. My husband, on the other hand, has undiagnosed dyslexia and dyspraxia, failed his 11+ and went to a technical school, but is so bloody-minded that he went to University, achieved a doctorate and is now internationally renowned in his field.
Our son was identified as G & T at primary school, and was only one of two of his friendship group who went the the local outstanding state school as we happen to live two streets away, and we all (him included) wanted him to go to a school where he could meet different types of people, as neither of us had a private school background. He is currently in his 3rd year of a 4-year degree at a Russell Group University and is set to get a first.
I suppose why I'm trying to say is that teachers are treated so badly and standards are so low in the state system that, even though I don't agree with private education, I see why some parents choose it and if they're going to have someone to support their children in achieving this, it may as well be me.
The teacher shouldn't have raised it publicly, though, and I would definitely