If a parent doesn't pay for his children one month is he allowed to see them?

[leigh1996]

Citizens advice is really busy so I'm waiting 7 days on a call back

If he doesn't pay this month is he able to see them. I know parental rights you need to do your responsibilities too.

This isn't spiteful but he has taken many holidays whilst there was no money. F

He's never bought a thing for them and watched us have no money during the week I stopped being a student to claiming benefits. An entire month with nothing and he was booking holidays.

Believe me it's not to be spiteful I want the kids to have enough food etc

I've never stopped him seeing them ever I've had to force it upon him to try and get a tiny bit of a chance to get a job etc

It's not about his right to see them, your children have a right to see their father.
Maintenance is separate.

Wait - I’ve just read “baby daddy”. As you were.

OP, do you have a consent order in place for maintenance? If so, then he is breaking the order for maintenance. If it's through the CMS, it is an arrangement, not a court order.
Contact is a separate court order and that cannot be broken in response to a consent order being broken/maintenance not being paid.

He's obligated by law to pay isn't he? only if it's been ordered by the court. CMS arrangement is not a court order.

OP, I strongly advise you read this:
www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/children-and-young-people/child-maintenance1/choosing-how-to-arrange-child-maintenance/check-what-child-maintenance-arrangement-is-right-for-you/

The HV's message is garbage and was never the correct advice.

@GeidiPrimes

Maybe put him on restrictions by limiting to short zoom calls?

No you do not!

@leigh1996

The courts wouldn't make him pay to let him see them.

He could never pay and the courts will allow him to see them.

Is he on the birth certificate?

If he isn't paying / underpaying then contact the CMS and they will deal with it

Contact and maintenance are 2 separate issues
The HV was wrong

OP, you need to separate out the two issues.

Maintenance needs sorting via CMS.

Contact between him and the kids should not be stopped contingent upon payment or not.

As pp said, courts take a dim view of RPs who try to prevent the other parent seeing their kids.

Yes of course. Outrageous to suggest that he shouldn't.

Is his name on the property you live in? I think you misunderstood the HV or they weren't clear in what they said. If he has no rights to the property, you don't need to let him in your home, whether he pays or not! He sees the dc outside of your home. If he refuses to see them outside your home, you need to keep records to show you have offered reasonable contact and he has refused.

You need to formalise everything: maintenence and contact arrangements OUTSIDE your home. And if he has rights to the property (ie in his name) you need to sort that ASAP.

Yes, by law he has to support his dc. But that is enforced through CMS. Paying maintenence does not give him the right to see the dc, simply being their father does that.

You use your children as a bargaining tool for money?

I was just going along with OP's logic notaknob.

Ummmm like everyone else has said you need to go through CMS and seek legal advice on getting structured access out in place. I don't know why you didn't do that in the first place if you knew he was a dick

@Aposterhasnoname I'm not trying to stop him I'm trying to get the money he should pay for them to be able to have a life, clothes when needed etc

If he had to pay to stop himself looking bad he'd do it and then my kids could have everything they needed

The poverty payment brought in by the Scottish government saved us drastically. When it shouldn't have been that way when their dad could have easily paid for things like he should have.

The court would rip you apart at the suggestion of no pay no see.

@leigh1996

How long does he have to not pay for to not be able to see them?

Paying maintenance does not equal being able to see the children. They are two seperate matters.

There’s an easy solution here: CMS. Get off MN and on the phone to him.

*them

The two things are separate. I genuinely have sympathy I am the resident parent myself and believe me I understand the frustration when I first split from Exdh but seriously please listen

It is not ever ok to refuse access because of money. It will damage your children in a different way if you start playing games like this.

I have an informal arrangement but exdh is crystal clear that he ever messes up again I will go straight to court (exdh screwed me around at the beginning and has been stable since ). It is never an option to refuse him seeing them for financial reasons.

Its a well worn phrase but they are absolutely not pay per view. The two issues are separate.

Why were you taking advice from a Health Visitor on this? And it was bad advice, it was their opinion not fact. It seems unfair that a parent can not live up to responsibilities and still have rights but there you go. Good luck op.

Wow, is this real?
You need to get done real advice and go to cms if your informal agreement isn’t working
Your kids aren’t a commodity to bargain with, they should see their father
Yes he is a shit for booking his holidays and not paying you what he should, sadly this isn’t an unusual event but please don’t use your kids to get back at him

Him mot paying maintanence- makes him an arsehole. You thinking that he needs to pay to see his kids, and that the relationship isn't more important- kinda makes you one too. Yes him not paying leaves you short, and isn't fair on the kids, and he should be paying. Get CSM involved if he's not paying, but don't hold time the kid(s) spend with their dad to ransom just because he's an arse

Is there a reason you don't want your children to have a relationship with their father other than the money? If so I think you need to go through the court system and it needs to be a pretty good reason.

He sounds like a total shit but the 2 things are unconnected
Your HV was very wrong to tell you otherwise

Start cms today you won't get it immediately but you will get it in future