Page 10 | To think there’s too much sex on tv/netflix

WiganNorthWest · 2021-03-23T23:10:12+00:00

Shows that I would otherwise enjoy watching with my teenagers/other family always seem to have graphic and gratuitous very long sex scenes. I don’t think they add anything to the plot and ruin our experience of watching as a family (makes me and my teenagers uncomfortable-and I think we are fairly close/informal usually). I’m thinking of game of thrones, Bridgerton, normal people and outlander which show a lot of sex and a lot of it is disturbing/rape. Does anyone actually enjoy watching these scenes/think they enhance shows? I wish there were ‘clean’ rated 12 versions of these shows on Netflix and you could chose which one to watch. I did enjoy sex education, and think this was done a bit more intelligently/sex scenes weren’t just there for the sake of it/a lazy way to attract viewers but were necessary for the plot. AIBU/ a prude?

GoLightlyontheEarth · 25/03/2021 13:29

What about mainstream TV though? No tV licence and you can’t even watch catch up now.

reprehensibleme · 25/03/2021 13:33

Just rewatching the best version of Pride and Prejudice (Ehle/Firth) with Ddad. Lovely, romantic, uplifting and no cringey sex scenes. Ditto North and South. Appear to have gone a bit Mary Whitehouse in my dotage - most TV and film sex is gratuitous and the violence that often goes with it is depressing.

SmokedDuck · 25/03/2021 13:37

@User133847

Maybe as pornography has become so ubiquitous for men, this stuff is instead being marketed to women via the medium of story and TV. The hunky serial killers, the period dramas with tons of sex, fantasy genres with female leads (and tons of sex).

But this is unappealing to a lot of women. It's all wank fodder for teenage boys.

You might be onto something there. Outlander, after all, is based on what are really pretty standard romance novels. Better conceived and written than the pulp stuff, but still very much typical of the genre. When I worked in a library there were women who would check out those books in bulk, like 10 a week.

I actually think there are a fair number of women who like the tv shows like that, it's not universal to find them boring/distasteful. My dumb cousin, nice girl but thick as molasses, loves Bridgerton. If she could put herself out to read a whole book, sexy romance novels would be her choice of genre.

A lot of women, even if not porn watchers, are also pretty desensitised to it, their partners watch and it just seems normal to them. So they may well not be bothered by that element or what it suggests about the working requirements for these shows. Women have always liked their sexy stories with a narrative around them.

aSofaNearYou · 25/03/2021 13:39

*I think it gets mentioned more because is is suggestive of the problem from a production POV. In the sense that a show that would have been adult and violent with some limited sexual content basically had all kinds of sex added, because... well pretty much because they wanted to show a lot of tits, and push the envelope.

It undermined the writing as well, so it shows that it's not about telling the story.*

Well in GOTs case I've read the books and they're very much the same so I don't really think the sex was added in. Some shows like GOT are just blatantly 18+ and you can't really be surprised by sex therefore being a big feature. There were a few examples of sexual violence added in that were not in the books and I agree those examples aren't great, but more for representation reasons than because it puts families off. I really don't think families should be watching it anyway, I still remember quite a few really disturbing acts of violence from GOT and I barely remember the tits!

Spidey66 · 25/03/2021 13:47

I watched It's a Sin recently. I loved, loved, loved it, was sad when it ended and the characters felt like my mates....but yes the sex was pretty graphic, regardless of the sexuality of the characters. So by that standard...yeah.

SmokedDuck · 25/03/2021 13:51

@aSofaNearYou

*I think it gets mentioned more because is is suggestive of the problem from a production POV. In the sense that a show that would have been adult and violent with some limited sexual content basically had all kinds of sex added, because... well pretty much because they wanted to show a lot of tits, and push the envelope.

It undermined the writing as well, so it shows that it's not about telling the story.*

Well in GOTs case I've read the books and they're very much the same so I don't really think the sex was added in. Some shows like GOT are just blatantly 18+ and you can't really be surprised by sex therefore being a big feature. There were a few examples of sexual violence added in that were not in the books and I agree those examples aren't great, but more for representation reasons than because it puts families off. I really don't think families should be watching it anyway, I still remember quite a few really disturbing acts of violence from GOT and I barely remember the tits!

No, they aren't. There's a certain amount of sex that happens - a lot of that isn't much in the show at all because it's not sexy sex, or people would actually find it creepy and inappropriate, because it's meant to be. They were probably right to take that out because seeing that kind of thing on tv is different than reading t, but that doesn't mean you can replace it with something different and get the same feel.

On the other hand they transfer all kinds of scenes to brothels which are not much like the ones in the books. And everything is very clean and 21st century. Lots of lesbian action added too, of course. And some really embarrassing stuff as they go on too, so cheezy.

schnubbins · 25/03/2021 13:53

I'm just sick of Netflix et al .Most films are just pure violence and killing .anything funny is banned cause someone somewhere will be 'offended' so its just better than everyone watches people being mutilated and call it entertainment.I look at pretty pictures on Instagram in the evenings now .

MoChridhe · 25/03/2021 14:09

I don't get the connection between someone being dumb and thick as mollases liking romance books and Bridgerton.
I don't think one must be intelligent if they love watching endless action sequences and killings.

rhowton · 25/03/2021 14:16

I've really noticed it on Netflix.

Designated Survivor went from being a relatively "normal" show when they were on ABC to a lot of swearing and graphic sex scenes when Netflix took over. I enjoyed all three seasons but the difference was staggering. You could really tell the difference between seasons 1&2 compared to 3.

Same happened with Lucifer.

aSofaNearYou · 25/03/2021 14:20

*No, they aren't. There's a certain amount of sex that happens - a lot of that isn't much in the show at all because it's not sexy sex, or people would actually find it creepy and inappropriate, because it's meant to be. They were probably right to take that out because seeing that kind of thing on tv is different than reading t, but that doesn't mean you can replace it with something different and get the same feel.

On the other hand they transfer all kinds of scenes to brothels which are not much like the ones in the books. And everything is very clean and 21st century. Lots of lesbian action added too, of course. And some really embarrassing stuff as they go on too, so cheezy.*

I didn't actually get the same impression. The sex scenes in the book were creepier in the sense that the characters were much younger, but besides that I actually thought there was a lot more consensual sex than in the show, which threw in a lot more rape. Anyway, I won't attempt that all the sex in it was well thought out and in good taste because I know it wasn't, but my point was rather that if you're going to avoid watching GOT with kids, it should probably be because of the disturbing violence, regardless of whether there was sex in it or not.

tentimesaday · 25/03/2021 14:24

@schnubbins

I'm just sick of Netflix et al .Most films are just pure violence and killing .anything funny is banned cause someone somewhere will be 'offended' so its just better than everyone watches people being mutilated and call it entertainment.I look at pretty pictures on Instagram in the evenings now .

I think you're on to something. There is a lot of sensitivity regarding what characters can say and who is represented and how they are represented. Sex and violence are seen as safe (!) so TV and films wallow in them. Ironic, isn't it? People will lose their minds over a Dr Seuss book, but a film featuring graphic violent rape or soft porn is A-OK.

GoLightlyontheEarth · 25/03/2021 15:27

Yes, sad to say I think that sums it up.

WisnaeMe · 25/03/2021 16:03

I think you're on to something. There is a lot of sensitivity regarding what characters can say and who is represented and how they are represented. Sex and violence are seen as safe (!) so TV and films wallow in them. Ironic, isn't it? People will lose their minds over a Dr Seuss book, but a film featuring graphic violent rape or soft porn is A-OK.

agreed 🌺

SmokedDuck · 25/03/2021 16:16

@MoChridhe

I don't get the connection between someone being dumb and thick as mollases liking romance books and Bridgerton. I don't think one must be intelligent if they love watching endless action sequences and killings.

I don't think I said anything about viewers of action films? It doesn't seem relevant to the discussion.

My comment was an anecdote, mainly in response to the comment I quoted, suggesting that maybe for some certain shows like this are playing a similar role as porn does for some men.

That mirrors the way men and women use other types of porn - men tend to like pretty straightforward visual representations, but some women consume it in large amounts in narrative form. Enough that romance novels are one of the few areas that make regular money in publishing now.

Given that there seems to be something of a falling away from reading among younger people, and the tendency for them to prefer visual content like youtube even for things that would be quicker to just read, it seems plausible that tv versions of those novels might become popular.

User133847 · 25/03/2021 16:35

Given that there seems to be something of a falling away from reading among younger people, and the tendency for them to prefer visual content like youtube even for things that would be quicker to just read, it seems plausible that tv versions of those novels might become popular.

Therefore, it's the visual form of romance novels for women, with all the sex scenes thrown in. That's how it seems to be marketed anyway, with the assumption that 'sex sells'. Netflix or HBO for example can get away with it more than the traditional networks.

BBC dramas, mostly, for example don't tend to be one long orgy. You might get the odd sex scene.

GoLightlyontheEarth · 25/03/2021 17:33

Do women want to see rape or abuse scenes though? I really think all the sex and titillation is for male viewers mostly.

WisnaeMe · 25/03/2021 17:40

@GoLightlyontheEarth

Do women want to see rape or abuse scenes though? I really think all the sex and titillation is for male viewers mostly.

I am a woman, I personally do not want to watch sex or rape scenes.

It adds nothing to the story, zilch, zero.

🌺

MissConductUS · 25/03/2021 17:43

Standards must be different in the US. There is no sex on broadcast TV and I haven't noticed much on Netflix either, but that may be because of the series I tend to watch.

User133847 · 25/03/2021 17:46

@GoLightlyontheEarth

Do women want to see rape or abuse scenes though? I really think all the sex and titillation is for male viewers mostly.

They're trying to tap into the success of 50 shades.

AgeLikeWine · 25/03/2021 18:12

I don’t understand censorious prudishness. Never have, never will. It’s just sex. It’s part of life, everyone does it, and if you’re doing it properly it’s fun.

NiceGerbil · 25/03/2021 19:12

Is that including sexual violence against women?

That is very much a part of life. As are child abuse, animal cruelty etc etc

NiceGerbil · 25/03/2021 19:16

There have been a number of instances where blokes have hacked stuff- a channel for children hacked to show porn, men hacking a zoom classroom in Singapore and showing porn, wanking, telling the girls to lift their skirts. And a lot more.

These things are all a part of life. In that, they have happened in real life and showing/ behaving indecently towards children is not uncommon.

Would objecting show up a level of censorious prudishness (omg Mary Whitehouse these women are just boring and uptight prudes don't listen to them).

WisnaeMe · 25/03/2021 19:29

@AgeLikeWine

I don’t understand censorious prudishness. Never have, never will. It’s just sex. It’s part of life, everyone does it, and if you’re doing it properly it’s fun.

I don't watch people having Sex or being Raped in every day life 🤔

Deadringer · 25/03/2021 19:43

That's a good point about animal cruelty, i know there are people who starve, beat and abuse animals, but i don't want to see it simulated on screen for 'entertainment'.

Original poster

WiganNorthWest · 25/03/2021 19:46

@AgeLikeWine

I don’t understand censorious prudishness. Never have, never will. It’s just sex. It’s part of life, everyone does it, and if you’re doing it properly it’s fun.

I have no problem with sex and love having it away from my kids/in private. What i find less fun is sitting with my family watching other people have sex in shows which would otherwise be good entertainment. It’s also not fun watching people have sex in tv shows when I’m watching on a train and people/kids may see what I’m watching. And I imagine it’s not fun for a lot of actors to have to simulate sex in a room full of film crew in order to get many high profile parts. Sex itself isn’t the problem

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