To be a true feminism, I need to address my own misandry?

[FerrisWheelTrain]

For example - are terms like LTB sexist?

The problem in society is ...women see themselves only as victims.

No we don't. Does that help?

Sorry, I forgot the

Amusing choice of terminology given the subject at hand.

@Pumperthepumper that my DS2 - who is the sweetest, most gorgeous toddler - who loves feeding dollies, pointing at flowers etc - will somehow feel ashamed one day, because it is assumed he should/will behave a particular way. That he might want to serve society when he is older, but will have his ribs broken because he is male.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper that my DS2 - who is the sweetest, most gorgeous toddler - who loves feeding dollies, pointing at flowers etc - will somehow feel ashamed one day, because it is assumed he should/will behave a particular way. That he might want to serve society when he is older, but will have his ribs broken because he is male.[/quote]
That’s, again, not misandry. That’s toxic masculinity.

Who’s going to break his ribs?

The bottom line is that LTB isn't misandrist in the slightest:

1. It can mean bastard or bitch
2. It is used in the context of abusive relationships so not applied to a group as a whole

If there is misandry (which I don't agree there is, but for arguments sake) it's not having a large scale negative impact upon men is it? It's not resulting in men dying at the hands of women, or getting paid less than women, or having inadequate healthcare comparatively to women, etc etc. Misogyny on a societal level is causing all of that for women. We are getting raped and murdered and paid less and medically treated inadequately.

Ltb - every single time that's written it's based upon evidence no? An op telling us of misdeeds, awful behaviour, good reasons for pps to say that ltb is an answer. When I type ltb I'm not calling all men bastards am I? I'm identifying that the man (or , albeit far less common, upon a site billed for MUMS - woman) discussed in that thread , is ,based upon the evidence I'm presented with, a bastard .

Similarly I want my DD to feel safe walking home. I want her to know she can rely on a police officer if she feels unsafe.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper that my DS2 - who is the sweetest, most gorgeous toddler - who loves feeding dollies, pointing at flowers etc - will somehow feel ashamed one day, because it is assumed he should/will behave a particular way. That he might want to serve society when he is older, but will have his ribs broken because he is male.[/quote]
How is that anything to do with misandry?

If your toddler was female, and was looking forward to a life of being unable to walk alone in the dark for fear of being raped or murdered (and then being blamed for 'bringing it on herself'), then you might feel slightly differently.

@FerrisWheelTrain

Similarly I want my DD to feel safe walking home. I want her to know she can rely on a police officer if she feels unsafe.

That’s also not misandry. That’s police corruption.

@Pumperthepumper stereotypically a male. Who has stereotypically been brought up believing that’s how males should/will behave. Like I said - if we assume this is the ‘norm’ for male behaviour - we just feed the stereotype.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper stereotypically a male. Who has stereotypically been brought up believing that’s how males should/will behave. Like I said - if we assume this is the ‘norm’ for male behaviour - we just feed the stereotype.[/quote]
Who’s ‘we’?

You think feminists are to blame for men being violent?

@BrumBoo it’s everything to do with misandry. He will be pushed into a society that will make assumptions about him.

We is society @Pumperthepumper - and I’m sad to say you’ve jumped to a conclusion to assume I’m assuming it’s feminists. I absolutely don’t.

@FerrisWheelTrain

We is society *@Pumperthepumper* - and I’m sad to say you’ve jumped to a conclusion to assume I’m assuming it’s feminists. I absolutely don’t.

I’m not assuming anything, it’s really difficult to follow your logic. None of the examples you gave are a result of misogyny in society. What you actually want to talk about is either 1) toxic masculinity or 2) why people don’t trust the police.

Regardless, it’s got nothing to do with feminism.

OP may I suggest you invest in a dictionary and find out what misandry actually means.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@BrumBoo it’s everything to do with misandry. He will be pushed into a society that will make assumptions about him.[/quote]

If the male 'class' as a whole get better at calling out misogynist behaviour then perhaps women would feel less scared of men. As it stands it's up to women to keep themselves safe, to think about the impact on male MH when they say "all men".

It's not misandry!

Misandry definition- dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against men

Toxic masculinity definition - toxic masculinity refers to traditional cultural masculine norms that can be harmful to men, women, and society overall; this concept of toxic masculinity does not condemn men or male attributes, but rather emphasizes the harmful effects of conformity to certain traditional masculine ideal

Toxic masculinity is a problem and one we should all set ourselves against societally- but it's not really relevant to a woman's stance on feminism is it?

OP may I suggest you invest in a dictionary and find out what misandry actually means

To be fair, misandry isn’t in the Oxford dictionary, because it’s not a real thing.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@naunet - but feminism IS about equality[/quote]
My brand isn’t solely about equality.

@Pumperthepumper well it is - because I want to raise a strong daughter, and a strong son. DD is an absolute fighter. She is highly sociable - and I’ve been supporting her this weekend to stop excluding a male classmate who wants to be her friend. DS is quiet, nervous, unobtrusive - and easily hurt. Neither of them conform - and what is it exactly that they should conform to?

Ah. A short way down the page and NAMALT appears.

And for an extra brownie point, appears in the context of a horrific and far too common assault against women.

OP has shown their hand. Not a good faith post.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper well it is - because I want to raise a strong daughter, and a strong son. DD is an absolute fighter. She is highly sociable - and I’ve been supporting her this weekend to stop excluding a male classmate who wants to be her friend. DS is quiet, nervous, unobtrusive - and easily hurt. Neither of them conform - and what is it exactly that they should conform to?[/quote]
Oh god, I actually can’t believe I’m wasting time with this. None of this is relevant to your op. None of it. None of it is relevant to feminism. None of it is relevant to misandry. I have no idea what you want them to conform to.

What’s your issue? What do you want to talk about? How to raise your children?

When people say LTB on here they are referring to a specific man in a specific relationship and are reacting to what the poster has said. They are not saying all men are bastards, that all women should leave all men or that all men are hated
If someone told you they were in an abusive relationship would you advise them to leave?

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@naunet - but feminism IS about equality[/quote]
No. Although that is what all these third wave liberal feminists would have you believe, because it totally dilutes feminism.

It's probably easier to understand if you use the 70's term Women's Liberation. Feminism was not about seeking equality but liberation. Liberation from the control of patriarchy. Liberation from the societal expectations. Liberation from the narrow 'choices' we had available to us.

The idea of 'equality' was used very specifically, e.g. in the phrase 'equal pay for work of equal value'. Because 'equality' is quite a woolly term really, you have to spell out what you mean by it. Equal pay, equal access, equal opportunity - all very specific goals. But not the woolly 'equality' as used by the libfems, who then translate that into centring everyone in their version of feminism except women.