To be a true feminism, I need to address my own misandry?

[FerrisWheelTrain]

For example - are terms like LTB sexist?

There are boys who do ballet, but not many.

To be fair, the OP isn’t saying there aren’t boys who do ballet - she’s saying the reason more boys don’t is because of women.

@Anniegetyourgun of course, I’d completely support an abused person to leave their abuser - but is it almost overused as a throwaway acronym? Should we challenge it? Are we subtlety implying that men are likely to be bastards - and feeding that stereotype - without knowing the full facts of a situation?

@ifIwerenotanandroid I’d advise not reading their posts and commenting elsewhere? It’s quite simple really!

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Anniegetyourgun of course, I’d completely support an abused person to leave their abuser - but is it almost overused as a throwaway acronym? Should we challenge it? Are we subtlety implying that men are likely to be bastards - and feeding that stereotype - without knowing the full facts of a situation?[/quote]
Hang on, so you’re now worried that if women call their abuser a bastard, we should hear his side of the story first? That’s getting dangerously close to ‘women lie’.

@Pumperthepumper can I request that you stop twisting my words, with absolutely no explanation of what you mean? If I’m annoying you - please report me - or join a different thread perhaps?

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper can I request that you stop twisting my words, with absolutely no explanation of what you mean? If I’m annoying you - please report me - or join a different thread perhaps?[/quote]
You’re not annoying me - I’m interested what you mean by ‘without knowing the full facts of the situation’ - that sounds a bit too like ‘she’s lying’.

@Pumperthepumper in a court of law - do you have a defence and a prosecution? Would a judgement be fair if only the defence was heard - or only the prosecution was heard?

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper in a court of law - do you have a defence and a prosecution? Would a judgement be fair if only the defence was heard - or only the prosecution was heard?[/quote]
So you are suggesting she’s lying? We need both sides of the story before we can believe someone who comes on here to talk about her abuse?

@Pumperthepumper

There are boys who do ballet, but not many.

To be fair, the OP isn’t saying there aren’t boys who do ballet - she’s saying the reason more boys don’t is because of women.

Eh?

You need to understand that when people say LTB on here it is out of support for someone going through an awful time at the hands of someone else (usually a man but not always). SUPPORT. They're not trying to be politically correct. They're not saying all men are bastards. They're not hating on men. They're not walking around in real life referring to men as "bastards". All they're saying is that specific man/person in that specific situation needs to go because of their awful behaviour.

Also, as other people have said, there are many more bad words specific to women than there are for men, but bastard is a gender neutral one. It's a reflection of behaviour, not sex or gender.

@Pumperthepumper ok - in the case of the Irish rugby players, I believed her - and it grates me hugely that the men in that case are continuing their glittering careers relatively unscathed. However, the rugby players did have a right to a defence. Would you say that they didn’t and should have been prosecuted without question?

Erm, important point of order, Mumsnet is not a court of law. It has no authority or jurisdiction. It's a message board where people share experiences, and opinions, no more no less. . . so obviously right to a defence, burden of proof, etc does not apply. . .

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper ok - in the case of the Irish rugby players, I believed her - and it grates me hugely that the men in that case are continuing their glittering careers relatively unscathed. However, the rugby players did have a right to a defence. Would you say that they didn’t and should have been prosecuted without question?[/quote]
But mumsnet isn’t a court of law. How can we possibly say to someone, who comes on here asking for advice or support about her abuse, ‘hang on, I can’t believe you until you ask the man in question to come on here and jot down a few lines about his side of the story’.

@BadNomad - so is ‘ditch the bitch’ acceptable on dadsnet? I acknowledge that the origin of the term bastard is gender neutral. But it’s slang dictionary definition states that it applies to typically a male who is selfish or arrogant. I would therefore argue that it’s a gender derogatory term and not appropriate?

@Pumperthepumper yes, I agree. And I think some truly excellent advice is given on mumsnet. BUT both the advisor and the advised be mindful that it’s one sided advice surely? But in terms of a safe haven - where an abused woman can state exactly how she feels and get support - it’s vital.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@BadNomad - so is ‘ditch the bitch’ acceptable on dadsnet? I acknowledge that the origin of the term bastard is gender neutral. But it’s slang dictionary definition states that it applies to typically a male who is selfish or arrogant. I would therefore argue that it’s a gender derogatory term and not appropriate?[/quote]
And what a surprise. No answer, just deflection to something else. You’ve talked talked about not being able to trust the police for a while, do you want to get back to that?

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@Pumperthepumper yes, I agree. And I think some truly excellent advice is given on mumsnet. BUT both the advisor and the advised be mindful that it’s one sided advice surely? But in terms of a safe haven - where an abused woman can state exactly how she feels and get support - it’s vital.[/quote]
Agree with what?

Are we able to believe women when they talk about their abuse or not? Do we need the man’s side or not?

Now I'm getting more flashbacks. At one time we used to get one or two threads pretty much every week being all shocked at the language that posters - mothers! - were allowed to use on MN. The most classic response was one who replied "Off you fuck then, cuntychops". Ah, the good old days.

Yes, this is the one with the swearing. And the permission to LTB. And no glitter.

[quote FerrisWheelTrain]@ArcheryAnnie
bills.parliament.uk/bills/2719
Why is it mentioned here then?[/quote]
Because the person who introduced it is a bloke who doesn't understand the issue. Duh.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.forbes.com/sites/karlynborysenko/2020/02/12/the-dark-side-of-metoo-what-happens-when-men-are-falsely-accused/amp/
@Pumperthepumper

@FerrisWheelTrain

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.forbes.com/sites/karlynborysenko/2020/02/12/the-dark-side-of-metoo-what-happens-when-men-are-falsely-accused/amp/ *@Pumperthepumper*

And now it’s false accusations? Back to don’t believe women?

@ArcheryAnnie ok - I get you! Only women are permitted to have views about gender issues Duh me!

Mumsnet 'siding with me are you 10
They removed a post that went against talk guidelines, they are not 'siding with you'

@Pumperthepumper read the article!! And it’s written by a woman!

@TwoBreakingIntoOne they sided with my reason for flagging the post!