Miffed about baby clothes gift.

[HappyCat5]

Sorry loooong rant- please don't hate me for this!!
I have 5 weeks till baby's due date. I'm counting the weeks and days- I'm just so excited.

She will be our first child (and our rainbow baby- we had a first trimester loss before- which hit hard)
I worry that perhaps because of a previous loss, I sometimes may be coming across too precious at times.

I haven't bought her any clothes yet. My family and friends have gifted me lots of clothes (mostly pink) which are adorable and I love them all (even if some aren't the most practical, I hope she gets to wear them all a at least once).

My partner wanted things a little less pink, because he doesn't like the colour much so he has bought her some really cute yellow outfits to break things up.

Again, I love them- I have no preference on colour really (it just so happens people are buying me pink things- her room is lilac and white. I like a lot of baby clothes- there's hardly any I don't find cute).

But my co-workers have recently gifted me boy sleepsuits knowing that we are having a girl.

I was happy that I wasn't at work, because my partner could see the look on my face and I felt that they put very minimal thought into this gift.

There is so much choice for baby clothes online- for so less money (they left price on). I'm finding it hard to understand why they would choose boy clothes for my little girl.

They're not even unisex- I have a few unisex outfits already. And, these clothes just aren't very cute.

Mr. "There's too much pink" himself, wasn't happy with them sending me quite blatant male clothing. He felt that they were deliberately disrespecting me.

I've been trying to justify the reason why they would send these to me- and perhaps it was an oversight and I'm just being precious and ungrateful about the gift- but in the back of my mind, I don't think I am.

I haven't worked there long (had to move from my old job because of Covid) and they're all lovely co-workers btw, I just don't know them too well yet. I even said they didn't have to get me a gift- I wouldn't have minded not having one, and wasn't expecting one.

I'm thinking of sending the clothes on to people I know who have recently had boys- and will obviously ask them first if it's to their tastes or not. Maybe that's a callous move, I don't know- but they shouldn't go to waste, just because I don't want them.

I am unsure whether I should be feeling quite as bitter as I do over this gift. Am I just being a bit bratty about this?

I'd exchange them, I had to do the same when my newborn wouldn't fit into the clothing my workplace bought for him!

On the other hand... I had a boy first and I'm currently pregnant, no idea what the sex is and we'll wait until I give birth to find out... I'll re-use loads of the clothing from my little boy, I think girls look lovely in blue! You can always layer with a pink/lilac cardigan for e.g. if you want to add a more feminine touch...

@Babyg1995

There is such a thing as boy and girl clothes ffs only on mumsnet if I knew someone was having a girl I wouldn't buy them blue sleep suits . It would be colours like yellow , cream or yes pink because its a girl do people really but girls blue sheepskins from the boys department in shops because they are separate .

Some of the nicer sleepsuits we had were blue (for both my daughter and my son).

I've just had a quick look at the sleepsuits on Next, which are not segregated into boy and girl (thankfully).

I could only find this one that I wouldnt buy for a daughter, purely because she isn't a little brother.

All the rest I'd put on a girl for sure.

My poor DD (2nd child) had to wear all the "boy" baby clothes we'd used with her older brother.
I'm obviously a terrible person.

I think buying a pastel blue/green sleepsuit for a girl is fine and pretty unisex. A pink sleepsuit bought specifically for a boy would be a bit odd (disclaimer - my own boy wore pink sleepsuits, but I wouldn't have bought them for someone else's child).

Mr. "There's too much pink" himself, wasn't happy with them sending me quite blatant male clothing. He felt that they were deliberately disrespecting me.

Okay, well aside from the fact that there's no such thing as 'quite blatant male clothing', why on earth would you leap to the assumption that your coworkers are deliberately 'disrespecting' you? Are they awful people? Have they been unpleasant to you in the past? Or, radical notion I know, but is it possible that rather than setting out to piss you off intentionally, they just made a mistake/ didn't know the sex of your baby? Why assume the worst of them?

I really, really, REALLY hope you're a troll.

@HappyCat5

Let see these sleepsuits then.

As everyone else said, it's just clothes. Your baby won't grow a willy if she wears blue ffs.

I can already imagine this poor girl is instantly going to be put in those awful 'girly' baby headbands just so 'everyone knows she's a girl'. Ear piercing by the time she's a toddler, because goodness forbid a child just looks like a child....

Really op?

I'm assuming you mean they're blue? I'm just about to have my second dd. When dd1 was born, a family member gave us loads of clothes from when their son was a newborn. Some have tractors and diggers on. Some are blue. They're clearly aimed at boys. But my dd wore them and dd2 will be wearing them. No big deal.

YANBU. Do you think they think you’re having a boy?!

This is my boy wearing his sisters handme down sleepsuit with, gasp, pink trim and love hearts on the sleeve.

You’d hate me OP, I dressed my little boy in a Liberty print sleepsuit. He looked adorable.

Aww. I remember how sensitive you can be when pregnant. I think it’s mean of them and do t blame you for being peeved. Keep them aside for when the child has a bad tummy episode. You won’t be waiting long for that. Or just send them to charity.

All my DDs has boys clothing at one stage or another as babies. It’s not a big deal. If you don’t like it, just regift it.

Not sure: could you describe the items you were GIVEN?

I bought lots from the boys section for my girl (and before I knew her sex) because I like bright, primary colours, and it seems impossible to find red, bright yellow and green in the girls sections. I also like things with rockets and space prints, and only cute baby animals or leopards make it to girls clothes.

Unless this person is being purposefully malicious or spiteful then you’re probably being a bit bratty yes.

Ask yourself - do I genuinely feel that this person has gone out of their way to make me feel like shit and to selfishly and purposefully take away from my experience of having a baby?
If the answer is no. Then let it go.

If the answer is yes then donate the baby clothes to a baby bank / charity and move on with your life because people like that don’t need any energy.

Honestly though it’s hardly likely someone has gone out of their way to be an arsehole to you over baby clothes?

Maybe they are skint? Maybe they are passing on some unused gifts? Maybe they don’t see the gender issue as you do?

Someone bought my little boy a very gorgeous gro bag from a pretty expensive brand. It was white with pink bows and little pink hedgehogs. I mean I don’t buy into gender but it was clearly marketed for baby girls.
That’s fine, we had plenty of other lovely gro bags. We used it once or twice and I actually recently donated to a new mum of a baby girl who couldn’t afford new stuff.

I never assumed that the person who bought it for me was trying to be passive aggressive and arsey over a gro bag.

Let it go; it will not matter in 5 weeks believe me.

Congratulations btw

YADNBU they're being awkward... Do you not get on, do they not like you? If it was me I'd give them away or sell! Xxx

@TitusPullo

You’d hate me OP, I dressed my little boy in a Liberty print sleepsuit. He looked adorable.

Aw I'll bet he did.

Joules Oliver dresses her youngest in beautiful florals/knits/bloomer bottoms etc. All different shade if the rainbow . He looks lovely in them.

Op, I think you're overthinking it a bit.

My dp was so exhausted after seeing DS born, he went home and told the neighbours we had a girl, and they told everyone else, so all my congrats cards are pink

It happens. People make mistakes, it's no big deal. And as others said, after they have been vomited and pood on a few times, it really won't matter. You'll end up with a mixture of things you like and things you don't. Just buy a few pretty cardigans to cover up the babybygrows.

Congratulations

OP I am pretty sure that once she is asleep neither you nor the baby will care what colour / design is on their sleep suit. And even if you are live-streaming her cot to the world no one else will care either.

You are going to have a tough time parenting if sleepsuitgate is worrying you so much.

Oh dear, anyone else spot spot some socks on top of the baby clothes....

@Babyg1995

There is such a thing as boy and girl clothes ffs only on mumsnet if I knew someone was having a girl I wouldn't buy them blue sleep suits . It would be colours like yellow , cream or yes pink because its a girl do people really but girls blue sheepskins from the boys department in shops because they are separate .

I agree skirts are "girls", and that boy and girls clothes are cut differently once they're older, and of course some say Bro or Little Miss etc but beyond that and certainly with sleepsuits, vests etc they are definitely the same cut just different colours. So you think they're giving newborn boys extra space in the crotch or the girls room for their hips??

Unless they something like son or Mr or some other male implied wording I can’t really see how they can be obviously boys? My dd wore loads of her brothers clothes as a baby blue and green is a beautiful colour on her and they were still in great condition.

Also tbh once they’ve puking,
Pissing or getting poo on clothes emergency you won’t care if they’re “boys” just relieved they’re clean and dry

I'd put it down to brain on their part. They'll probably be mortified when you announce the birth.
Hold onto them for the moment, you'll be surprised how many they go through a day. Congratulations

Some of these responses 🙄

OP- it's most likely they forgot you were having a girl- I'm sure the person who organised it would be mortified to hear they got it wrong!

My advice would be don't sweat the small stuff (but that's easy to say when you are not 35 weeks pregnant!) Use the clothes that are clearly unisex and donate/ eBay the rest

All the best wishes to you :)