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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Miffed about baby clothes gift.

191 replies

HappyCat5 · 23/03/2021 15:18

Sorry loooong rant- please don't hate me for this!!
I have 5 weeks till baby's due date. I'm counting the weeks and days- I'm just so excited.

She will be our first child (and our rainbow baby- we had a first trimester loss before- which hit hard)
I worry that perhaps because of a previous loss, I sometimes may be coming across too precious at times.

I haven't bought her any clothes yet. My family and friends have gifted me lots of clothes (mostly pink) which are adorable and I love them all (even if some aren't the most practical, I hope she gets to wear them all a at least once).

My partner wanted things a little less pink, because he doesn't like the colour much Grin so he has bought her some really cute yellow outfits to break things up.

Again, I love them- I have no preference on colour really (it just so happens people are buying me pink things- her room is lilac and white. I like a lot of baby clothes- there's hardly any I don't find cute).

But my co-workers have recently gifted me boy sleepsuits knowing that we are having a girl.

I was happy that I wasn't at work, because my partner could see the look on my face and I felt that they put very minimal thought into this gift.

There is so much choice for baby clothes online- for so less money (they left price on). I'm finding it hard to understand why they would choose boy clothes for my little girl.

They're not even unisex- I have a few unisex outfits already. And, these clothes just aren't very cute.

Mr. "There's too much pink" himself, wasn't happy with them sending me quite blatant male clothing. He felt that they were deliberately disrespecting me.

I've been trying to justify the reason why they would send these to me- and perhaps it was an oversight and I'm just being precious and ungrateful about the gift- but in the back of my mind, I don't think I am.

I haven't worked there long (had to move from my old job because of Covid) and they're all lovely co-workers btw, I just don't know them too well yet. I even said they didn't have to get me a gift- I wouldn't have minded not having one, and wasn't expecting one.

I'm thinking of sending the clothes on to people I know who have recently had boys- and will obviously ask them first if it's to their tastes or not. Maybe that's a callous move, I don't know- but they shouldn't go to waste, just because I don't want them.

I am unsure whether I should be feeling quite as bitter as I do over this gift. Am I just being a bit bratty about this?

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 23/03/2021 15:31

You're going to have to clarify why they're "boy" clothes - what is it about them that makes you think they're not unisex?

PatchworkElmer · 23/03/2021 15:32

I’m also wondering what makes them ‘boy’ sleepsuits?

LIamaDelRey · 23/03/2021 15:32

Keep them - use them for spares/emergency change of clothes/when they shit up the back of your nice ones. If baby is poorly use them. They will grow so fast and be in them such a short space of time it won't matter. Keep them, say thank you, know that if the first few weeks are tough and you get behind on laundry you have sleepsuits there ready to go - as long as they are cosy cotton it will not matter to your little girl one jot! Flowers

ethelredonagoodday · 23/03/2021 15:33

As others have said, sounds to me like someone had got their wires crossed and it's a genuine mistake. But also as others have said, they're just clothes when all said and done, and they will likely come in handy when you're doing your umpteenth change of the day due to exploding poos or whatever else.

It's really not a big issue.

Sexnotgender · 23/03/2021 15:37

Are you worried your little girl grow a penis if you put a blue sleepsuit on her?

I’m very pregnant, having a girl too.

99% of her clothes belonged to her older brother. They’re perfectly good clothes. So bloody what if they’re blue? Or green, is that a “boy” colour too?

Get a grip.

pheasantsinlove · 23/03/2021 15:38

YANBU op. Hopefully just a mistake... is there anything girlie in the gift or is it just boys and unisex stuff?

If no girlie stuff I'd send a message saying thank you very much for unexpected gift but think there's been a mistake as you're having a girl!

As for all the ' there's no such thing as boys clothes' posters... bullshit. Dress your own kids in what you like but like it or not in these clothes everyone would assume the baby was a boy.

imalmostthere · 23/03/2021 15:39

Do they 💯 know it's a girl??

minniemoocher · 23/03/2021 15:41

Unless they say boy on them, how are they for a boy? I deliberately bought sleepsuits from the "boy" department for my dd because I was hating all the pink I was sent!

imalmostthere · 23/03/2021 15:41

It's also a bit ridiculous to say theory blatantly disrespectful for it - it's a gift. There's nothing disrespectful about it.

StellaKowalski · 23/03/2021 15:41

@pheasantsinlove

YANBU op. Hopefully just a mistake... is there anything girlie in the gift or is it just boys and unisex stuff?

If no girlie stuff I'd send a message saying thank you very much for unexpected gift but think there's been a mistake as you're having a girl!

As for all the ' there's no such thing as boys clothes' posters... bullshit. Dress your own kids in what you like but like it or not in these clothes everyone would assume the baby was a boy.

Dress your own kids in what you like but like it or not in these clothes everyone would assume the baby was a boy

You don't even know what OP means by 'boys clothes' so how can you say that? Hmm

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 23/03/2021 15:41

Maybe someone got confused? Maybe they are actually unisex (which I'd say they all are unless they explicitly state girl or boy on the suit itself).

Can you post a pic/link?

I out my dcs into whatever I could find - blue, pink, red, black, white.

CrazyOldBagLady · 23/03/2021 15:41

Probably just a mistake. Can you exchange them for something you like?

Lou98 · 23/03/2021 15:41

You'll get a lot of people on here telling you you don't get "boys" and "girls" clothes and shouldn't be labelling them as such - ignore them!
I understand what you mean OP. You say they're lovely co-workers though so I can't imagine they've done it intentionally, it's probably been a case of they've either liked it and it's been to their taste, even for a girl, and so they thought you would like it too. Or they've maybe made a mistake, either forgetting you're having a girl or the person who's bought it has maybe had a couple of people to buy for and has perhaps just got mixed up on who's was who's.

Either way, it's the thought that counts and it sounds like you have plenty anyway, try not to give it too much thought x

arethereanyleftatall · 23/03/2021 15:42

I'm thinking there must be a slot in them for the penis. Maybe nestled behind are 2 slightly bigger ones for the balls. Is that what you mean?

Yes, yabu.

sunnydaleslayer · 23/03/2021 15:42

The frilly pink and yellow things you have bought or have been gifted probably won't make it out of the wardrobe if they are smaller than 3/6 months (I was the same when pregnant with my first which was also a girl... lots of dresses and pretty tights etc). Sleepsuits are easy and comfortable for baby who will spend most of her first few weeks sleeping or feeding. The great majority of which will end up covered in sick, wee, poo and you'll end up changing her 4/5 times a day. Keep the 'boy' sleepsuits, you'll need them.

NeedToGetOuttaHere · 23/03/2021 15:42

I think you may be overthinking it OP. I’d probably sell them or give them away. Most people who have a baby end up with a few gifts that aren’t ideal. I don’t think it’s anything worth getting upset about.

OldEvilOwl · 23/03/2021 15:43

Are you sure they know your having a girl? sounds like someone made a mistake

NeverMetANiceOne · 23/03/2021 15:44

I'm pretty sure when your newborn pukes or craps all over themselves for the 20th time that day you'll be beyond caring what colour the sleepsuit is.

Beautiful3 · 23/03/2021 15:44

I often bought clothes from the boys section for my girls, as I was sick of pink! However if they say, "daddy's boy" then they obviously thought you were having a boy?! I would keep them in your nappy/change bag for emergencies, e.g. poo exploding all up their back and ruining every piece of clothing!

PandaFluff · 23/03/2021 15:45

@pheasantsinlove

YANBU op. Hopefully just a mistake... is there anything girlie in the gift or is it just boys and unisex stuff?

If no girlie stuff I'd send a message saying thank you very much for unexpected gift but think there's been a mistake as you're having a girl!

As for all the ' there's no such thing as boys clothes' posters... bullshit. Dress your own kids in what you like but like it or not in these clothes everyone would assume the baby was a boy.

I don't think everyone would assume. I know I wouldn't. Loads of families use hand me downs from a child of the opposite sex. Some babies just suit the "wrong" colour.
Babyg1995 · 23/03/2021 15:45

There is such a thing as boy and girl clothes ffs only on mumsnet if I knew someone was having a girl I wouldn't buy them blue sleep suits .
It would be colours like yellow , cream or yes pink because its a girl do people really but girls blue sheepskins from the boys department in shops because they are separate .

SpnBaby1967 · 23/03/2021 15:46

What is it that makes them boy clothes op?

My DD (now 12) grew up on clothes covered in emergency vehicles or Thomas the tank engine stuff because that's what she likes.

Remember , your little girl wont care what shes wearing as long as shes warm, dry and loved which I am sure she will be.

I'd assume your colleagues just got the sex mixed up rather than doing anything deliberately. But you are being a bit precious.

Unless they state IM A BOY! on the clothes, it's a non issue.

PandaFluff · 23/03/2021 15:46

@minniemoocher

Unless they say boy on them, how are they for a boy? I deliberately bought sleepsuits from the "boy" department for my dd because I was hating all the pink I was sent!
Me too, and why does all the 'girls' stuff have unicorns but the 'boys' get lions!
LibertyWX · 23/03/2021 15:46

I stopped reading at the "disrespecting" part. For that YABU. OTT.

Babyg1995 · 23/03/2021 15:48

Ffs the typos BlushGrin you know what I mean sleepsuits not sheepskins 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

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