AIBU to question the cleanliness of my nurse friends houses?!

[Iseewhatshappeninghere]

I have 2 nurse friends, both separate families.
Both don't seem to clean their houses.
I'm not talking about a bit of muck in the corner or dirty skirting boards, you know "forgotten or out of sight areas" , I'm taking about thick thick thick dust on TV stands, windowsills, side tables anywhere really, mouldy windowsils/windows, bathroom sinks caked in makeup, baths with multiple black rings, you get the idea.
Its never really bothered me much before but with this pandemic I guess I've just noticed it more and my partner is quite concerned about it.
Am I being unreasonable to be a bit concerned?
I'm not a nurse, the closest I've been is a care worker but I would have thought cleaning would be quite a big thing considering how much I've been told over the years about dirt and dust harbouring germs and all sorts.
One of the nurses I've know for 10+ years and she's always lived like it so I've never really questioned it before. The other one has just moved house and we just assumed they were just concentrating on moving but they have now moved and moved all the dusty dirty items to the new house.
My partner says its not normal to live in such dirty houses, I've told him he needs to relax a bit about it as it's not like we live there.

Your friend could do without you I think.

I couldn't eat in a filthy house
I wouldn't expect my fiends to come over and eat sourounded by filth but apparently I'm in the minority here

Easily solved by never eating there?

One of the dirtiest and messiest houses I have ever been in was a neighbour who was a midwife.

She invited me in for coffee. We went through the living room which had stuff everywhere - had to move a pile of newspapers, books, post off an armchair to sit down. When we got into the kitchen the hob was disgusting, the worktops covered in crumbs, grease, dirty crockery. She grabbed 2 mugs off a worktop and just run them under the tap!

I really did not want a coffee by then but could not be that rude. How I managed to drink it I will never know

how are you or your husband aware of what the inside of their houses look like? it is currently illegal to go inside other people's houses.

and you might keep a clean house but you can't spell. DISGUSTING. no c in there.

I think this thread is just for people to bitch and moan about those lazy dirty nurses ....

who let's face it are probably best friends with the bone idle teaachers who work 9-3 and STILL can't be bothered cleaning-PROBABLY

My ex complained to all and sundry about me being a bad partner - never cleaning, vacuuming etc. He used to put on a big show when visitors came of being 'the hard done to housewife'.

Funny how after we separated I'm the one with the cleaner house now - my house may be cluttered but bathroom and kitchen and bins aren't a health hazard.

His house is habitable again now he's settled with a new partner - he now complains about how much she doesn't do around the house.

Oh God my ex wondered aloud at many points during our short marriage why I never cleaned up.
It took many times of me saying I'm not the only person living here before he took the hint and did it himself.

I think if the houses are so ‘discusting’ then don’t go round. They can always come to you can’t they, when it’s allowed. Think they would be very sad at your attitude towards them though.

Why do people hate nurses and teachers so much?

Who made you the housekeeping police?

You know your friend with the partner in prison? Maybe she’s depressed . Maybe it takes all her effort to get up in the morning, look after her dc and go to work? Ever thought about that?

You don’t sound like a very nice friend tbh.

you and your DH are bitchy people.

Some people just don't care about the cleanliness of their house. Keeping a house show-home like is hours out of the week.

I am a healthcare professional and pretty houseproud/cleaning obsessed at home but I would not assume that if my colleague has a dirty house that they have unhygienic practices at work.

Seems to be goady threads on these professions all the time don't get it

@VerityWibbleWobble

discusting

I'm going to be that dick, it's disgusting.

Not just you. I was about to post the same.

Very telling.

Impossible to tell at a distance as you could be the type who are only happy with an absolutely immaculate house and find any hint of a cobweb or dust as ‘absolutely disgusting’ or your friend could be like something out of life of grime! If your husband is very worried then the best thing to do is have people round to yours where you can control the environment.

Why the fuck are you going round their houses in the past year?

I'd rather go down the nurses' houses than be around you and your boyfriend.

You two are shit friends. Concerned, my arse. Why don't you offer to hire a cleaner for them?

@FoonySpucker me too

There was an interesting article a few months ago about how people with perfectly clean houses are actually pretty unhappy with their lives, and having that shiny sink is the only way they can show their worth and that they have control over a situation, even if that situation is a bottle of Jif.
So maybe we should all just do a collective head tilt and ask the OP is she's OK.

YABU. they probably don't have time. I think I seen someone previously say they work 13hr shifts 6 days a week.

I wouldn’t bother staying friends with people you so clearly dislike.

There are quite a lot of things I do at work I don’t do at home - like give my kid paracetamol without prescribing it and touch him without wearing gloves. Don’t observe the five moments of hand hygiene before hugging my family either.

I suppose it’s as if work and home are quite separate.

OK. I'm done here.
So I miss spelt one word and I'm getting jumped on because I have fat fingers 🤷‍♀️
Getting name called.
You are saying I'm the judgemental one but really alot of you should be looking in the mirror.
Maybe the reason people struggle in life is because they ask a question and get jumped on so noone bothers to talk anymore.
I'll leave you lot the argue amongst yourselves now before I give you more ammunition. 👋

Some of the most boring people I know bang on and on about how much housework they do and how clean their houses are. Does anyone other than them really care? Who goes round to friends houses inspecting for dust and dirt? Nasty fuckers!

you're not being jumped on because of your spelling but because you have posted a nasty, goady judgemental thread.

I didn't know there was such a thing as the Dusting Police?! Do they send Kim and Aggie around with some white gloves to check every surface/ledge/shelf? It is their own houses and it is up to them how much dusting they do. Not your partner. It must be hard working a job with long shifts, especially for the lady with the partner in prison.

My house is fairly clean and tidy but I only dust when I need to lucky for me, I don't need to very often, because why bother until you see it will make a difference. Life is too short and don't forget that housework just begets more housework to keep it absolutely spotless at all times

@StepOutOfLine Where was the article?

I have time to clean but I don't. I dont need an excuse. My house sounds similar to your 'friends'.

You say you've known them for over ten years but it's only become a problem for your dh recently. Sounds like he is the one with the problem. He's become 'concerned' about going somewhere he used to go to regularly. Has he changed in other ways?