To have reported my next door neighbour to the police?

[HeartsAndClubs]

This morning I am 99% certain that I heard my neighbour hitting his child. She was screaming in absolute terror and he was shouting at her while hitting her. It was loud enough that I could hear it through the walls. Then when she stopped screaming he carried on shouting. It’s now gone very quiet.

These neighbours are always shouting at one another, but never like this. I froze at the time so didn’t ring 999 before it had all died down, but I have reported it, and am about to report to social services.

But talking to a friend she said we don’t know the circumstances, and what if the child has SN and was screaming and head banging or similar and I should have stayed out of it.

I am 99% sure I’ve done the right thing. But what if friend is right? I’ve seen posts on here from parents saying their children scream constantly due to SN. I would hate to think that I have potentially put them under investigation if they might not have done anything.

Best case scenario is you have saved a child
Worst case is you won't get an xmas card from them

I can honestly say as a SEN parent YADNBU. I’d much rather have the police come and check out our situation and realise it’s SEN related than it be an abused child. You did the right thing OP.

Worst case is you won't get an xmas card from them Oh well nothing new there then.

They always keep themselves pretty much to themselves. they row often as a couple, but I’ve met her a few times and always thought she seemed very shy, but put it down to a language barrier as neither of them speaks good English. But he shouts constantly and I’ve heard them having rows late at night. But never anything like this.

Your always better off reporting anything you think may be child abuse than to not.

It is everyone's duty to safeguard children. Better for it to be checked than ignored and trust your instinct. If you felt it needed reporting then it probably did.

You have absolutely done the right thing.

I’ve now had a call back from SS after I rang to report this morning. She took all the details and then urged me to report to the police which I had obviously already done. She did say that obviously she can’t update me but that they would definitely be looking into it.

Obviously I can’t be sure whether that will happen or not, but at least it’s out there now.

@HeartsAndClubs

I’ve now had a call back from SS after I rang to report this morning. She took all the details and then urged me to report to the police which I had obviously already done. She did say that obviously she can’t update me but that they would definitely be looking into it.

Obviously I can’t be sure whether that will happen or not, but at least it’s out there now.

Well done op.

Sounds like the partner and children could be very isolated if they are not at school and don’t speak English.

Another one here who used to pray that someone, anyone would help me and my DB when we were kids. We were beaten, starved, humiliated, shouted at for absolutely nothing, deliberately dehydrated etc etc.

We lived in a "4 in a block" house so we had neighbours upstairs and through the wall. We attended school (but often wrote notes "from mum" asking to be excused from PE class because we were so bruised and ashamed) - I can't tell you how worthless my brother and I felt that no-one, either from school, other family members or a neighbour, cared enough to help us.

I'm sure you feel a bit uncomfortable about phoning, OP, but you absolutely did the right thing.

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good (wo)men to do nothing, as the saying goes.

To ignore is to be complicit in potential abuse.

Police and child services as a minimum.

Our neighbours called the police over half term due to the screaming, shouting and banging coming from our house. DC2 was having yet another violent meltdown and beating the shit out of ME. We are now getting lots of help from different agencies. He’s 10 and ASD. My 15 year old called the police a couple of nights later as the same thing was happening. I can honestly say both times the police were amazing. If there is no abuse OP the family may just get some extra support. You totally did the right thing and should hold your head up high. Your friend is a twat!

You have absolutely 100% done the right thing.

It is actually everyone's responsibility to report things. If it were SN then no harm done. When James Bulger was taken by those boys, lots of people saw and they weren't comfortable, nothing was done about it. They must feel terrible now.
You have absolutely done the right thing. Xxx

Might be a child with SN, in the other hand might be a child having the shit beaten out of them.

Better safe than sorry.

You've absolutely done the right thing. I'd rather live with the embarrassment of making a mistake and the screaming turning out to be nothing, than the 'what ifs' of a child being physically abused and seriously hurt and no one coming to their aid. You might have saved her life.

You've absolutely fine the right thing. If there is nothing to find then the police and social services will discover that. If the child was being hit then you've done your bit in trying to protect her.

I've done similar in the past. I've called the police on one set of ex neighbours 4 times. The police came out every time, and I believe that social services helped her leave him so she could keep the kids safe.

You've definitely done the right thing. It's better to be wrong and report than be right and do nothing. Imagine if something happened to her, you'd never forgive yourself. Well done

@ CarrieMoonbeams so sorry. did you get out in the end?

@SeenYourArse That is not true about having to be 5 to see a consultant. My DD saw one at 3 and diagnosed at 4

Well done OP better to be safe than sorry xx

I live in fear of my neighbours reporting me. DS screams and screams, throws things, breaks things, hits me. Occasionally I have shouted back. A few times I have screamed because he's hurt me badly. Luckily we have understanding neighbours at the moment.

Absolutely, you have done the right thing.

To OP.

It was a horrible experience for you- but I am certain you did the right thing.

@HeartsAndClubs

I’ve now had a call back from SS after I rang to report this morning. She took all the details and then urged me to report to the police which I had obviously already done. She did say that obviously she can’t update me but that they would definitely be looking into it.

Obviously I can’t be sure whether that will happen or not, but at least it’s out there now.

They will definitely look into it, they have a duty of care to that child.