The men I know feel like this too ...

[Givitarest]

This "Every woman you know" meme is trending on social media. But men are in danger from violent men too and, in fact, are much more likely to be a target. With reference to Jess Phillips, if a politician were to read out the names of all the men who had died at the hands of other men, as well as the women, it would be a very long list indeed. If society has "just accepted" dead women then we have just accepted dead men too.
I fear for my sons' safety, and give them very similar safety advice as I would if they were daughters. My husband has always taken similar measures to the things on this list (whilst also avoiding walking behind lone women etc) and has had more negative personal experiences than I have. So can people please stop sharing memes that demonise men? It is 'misandry' ... the antonym to mysogyny ... and the movement against violence will not win widespread support unless it is more appropriately framed.

@2021ismyyear

A victim of discrimination and that random people on internet and people in street thinking just because they are men, they are bad people.

This is actually laughable now - a victim of discrimination because he can’t wander past a primary school whenever he feels like it? Are you serious?

Yeah I am actually serious. Just because it doesn’t affect you doesn’t mean it’s nice. Are you belittling someone’s experience?

No, he is choosing to alter his actions based on what other people might think.

Whereas women are required to alter their actions based on what other people might do. . .

@2021ismyyear

Yeah I am actually serious. Just because it doesn’t affect you doesn’t mean it’s nice. Are you belittling someone’s experience?

He’s not being discriminated against because he can’t walk freely past a primary school whenever he feels like it, that’s unbelievably stupid.

Do you also think he’s discriminated against because he can’t hang out in the women’s toilets? Or because he can’t hide in an underpass and engage lone women in innocent conversation? Or because he can’t choose random children to walk home with?

But number two he would be irritated at the PEOPLE (note, I didn’t say women) that thought that just because he was a man, he could do the same thing.

Number three, he would identify with other men like him. Good eggs that are now getting treated differently because of the actions of the man over the road.

and herein lies the problem that you don't seem able to grasp, men as a sex class are responsible for 99% of all violent crime, how do you distinguish between those men who are a threat and those who are not? Give the benefit of the doubt and then, woops too late, oh dear never mind, but not all men are like that, you were just unlucky, what a shame.

If men as a sex class do not want to be viewed with fear and suspicion due to the actions of other members of their sex class what are they prepared to do to change that?

No no no... that young black man in the forest with the dog.... in my previous example. That lady called the police and lied about his behaviour. Men are also afraid of consequences too.

But, as I said before, if all he’s doing is walking past a primary school to buy a newspaper and then walk back home, who seriously is going to even notice him? I would only notice him if he took undue interest in the primary school, which he isn’t according to you.

So there really isn’t any real reason for him to even give this headspace never mind consider himself a victim of discrimination.

My ex lives opposite a primary school. He walks past it multiple times a day. Hes in his 50s and has grey hair. He doesnt feel the need to move or never walk past the school. He also believes that male violence is an issue especially male violence against women and girls. He has never once felt the need to say not all men when we have discussed it. He knows I know its not all men and he doesnr think I am an idiot who needs it pointing out.

@2021ismyyear

No no no... that young black man in the forest with the dog.... in my previous example. That lady called the police and lied about his behaviour. Men are also afraid of consequences too.

So you think your stepdad being unable to walk past a school whenever he feels like it is the same level of discrimination as the young black man who was verbally abused in the park?

You absolutely do not.

Reddogs... do you feel the same about other groups of people? Black people? Polish people? Traveller community? Muslim people? Jewish community?

If men as a sex class do not want to be viewed with fear and suspicion due to the actions of other members of their sex class what are they prepared to do to change that?...

Read that back and insert another group or “class”. I give up! I’m off to spend Mother’s Day with the evil men in my life whilst they plot hideous things.

2021ismyyear

You really are making a complete show of yourself.

Men have had their hands on the levers of power and the finance that enables that for Millenia yet they have failed spectacularly to address the issue of male violence, why is this? Apathy, indifference? Now that it is being highlighted we are met with but, but, you're not being nice enough, we are not all like that, defensiveness, and hurt feelings.

What are the solutions? What are men as a sex class prepared to do? You are saying the men in your family don't want to be viewed as a potential threat, so what are they going to do about it? Women, as has been proven time and time again, are not being listened to and are being dismissed and expected to just put up with the status quo in order to spare men's feelings, nothing changes as the ones with the power to make the changes are too busy nursing their hurt feelings and the knock to their collective pride.

A victim of discrimination and that random people on internet and people in street thinking just because they are men, they are bad people.

Actually what most people are saying here is -
people in street thinking just because they are men, they might be bad people, and being unable to tell the difference because a bad man, looks like a good man, as in they just look like a man, and statistics show that men commit far more violent crime, rape and murder than women, and the results of getting it wrong either way are either - offended men or harmed women, yet people like you think that the offended men are of far more importance than the harmed women. That women should put themselves at further risk of giving a bad man the benefit of the doubt so as not to offend a good one.
I think we've found the root of the problem.

@2021ismyyear

If men as a sex class do not want to be viewed with fear and suspicion due to the actions of other members of their sex class what are they prepared to do to change that?...

Read that back and insert another group or “class”. I give up! I’m off to spend Mother’s Day with the evil men in my life whilst they plot hideous things.

In other words women just give up, stop talking and let things carry on as they are, wonderful.

Imagine if people wouldn’t let him continue his charity work as he could be a murderer too based on the fact he is male.

Again, we don’t need to imagine that absurd scenario as it does not and never will happen. You’re offended by your own made-up nonsense. “Imagine if, what if, what about”. Just stop with your whataboutery. You sound ridiculous. There is no basis of fact in any of your ‘arguments’.

I have to be DBS checked because I work with vulnerable people (men and women)
Should I be angry and offended that the authorities, powers that be and society think I could be a threat by virtue of being part of a group that has shown to have abusers in it's ranks in the past and present, because I'm one of the 'good' ones that wouldn't dream of harming someone?

Or do I accept it's a reasonable way to weed out the abusers, and support such a scheme because it helps to protect vulnerable people? And be glad to take my DBS check knowing it reduces the risk of an abuser working alongside me and someone being harmed?

I think my biggest issue and why I felt compelled to write on this thread in support of the op is im beyond pissed off with the woke bandwagon nature of all these arguments. A new one every week.

We all agree that it would be completely fucking wrong of me to assume that all black young men in London are likely to stab me. I’ve looked up the crime stats on knife crime. I’ve read about police stop and search and how discriminated people feel. I know about the BLM movement. I’ve read about gangs.

Yet here we are and the same woke idiots are suggesting that men are a “class” and that the nice ones need to do something about the horrible ones actions. And that’s ok because there’s loads of men and they are not a minority group.

It’s woke/davina cancelling/bandwagon behaviour I can’t stand. With this... with piers Morgan, with race, mask wearing, royal family, with brexit. It’s exhausting. Next week there will be a new topic.

@2021ismyyear

This is staring to sound very much like the “all white people are racist” argument. I’m a firm believer that there are many men out there can navigate through life without being a dickhead.

My dh says this is just making him cross and creating a divide when it isn’t necessary. He says as a white male he feels extremely hated right now and doesn’t feel like a valued member of society. We can’t raise one part of society by treating another like utter shit.

Your husband needs to stop living in denial.

2021ismyyear

Men are a sex class.
White, black, Asian, Muslim, Catholic,Jewish men have all committed acts of violence against women and girls. The common factor here isn't the colour of their skin or their religion its that they are all men.

@2021ismyyear

‘Most’ men are not lovely. ‘Most’ men just don’t murder us. ‘Most’ men are the problem

Whoever said that is just an idiot.... if BLM has taught us anything it’s that we must not make assumptions and generalise based on someone’s appearance or what group they belong to.

You cannot have it both ways.

It would be like saying that all cops are evil because one was. It’s a ridiculous, extreme view. What about female police officers yesterday that got told “it should have been you” and had ACAB written on their cars at this peaceful event. Are they evil too? Anyone can be evil and we should be uniting to prevent it again. We need better education, more mental health provision, much, much tougher sentencing (both for people that commit violent crimes and those that make it up). CCTV should be improved. It will be harder to commit crimes if you know you are being watched and if caught you will never see daylight again. Telling a random on the internet that her husband is part of the problem because he has a penis isn’t really going to solve anything.

Most men join in with misogynistic jokes. Most men don’t call out other men who behave badly towards women. Most men promote other men at work or promote subservient women who don’t challenge them. Most men are the problem.

You are absolutely deluded and given what you say about your husband I’m starting to think you might be suffering from Stockholm Syndrome. He sounds absolutely vile.

@2021ismyyear

I think my biggest issue and why I felt compelled to write on this thread in support of the op is im beyond pissed off with the woke bandwagon nature of all these arguments. A new one every week.

We all agree that it would be completely fucking wrong of me to assume that all black young men in London are likely to stab me. I’ve looked up the crime stats on knife crime. I’ve read about police stop and search and how discriminated people feel. I know about the BLM movement. I’ve read about gangs.

Yet here we are and the same woke idiots are suggesting that men are a “class” and that the nice ones need to do something about the horrible ones actions. And that’s ok because there’s loads of men and they are not a minority group.

It’s woke/davina cancelling/bandwagon behaviour I can’t stand. With this... with piers Morgan, with race, mask wearing, royal family, with brexit. It’s exhausting. Next week there will be a new topic.

Maybe you should take a break if you’re finding it hard to cope.

@2021ismyyear

I think my biggest issue and why I felt compelled to write on this thread in support of the op is im beyond pissed off with the woke bandwagon nature of all these arguments. A new one every week.

We all agree that it would be completely fucking wrong of me to assume that all black young men in London are likely to stab me. I’ve looked up the crime stats on knife crime. I’ve read about police stop and search and how discriminated people feel. I know about the BLM movement. I’ve read about gangs.

Yet here we are and the same woke idiots are suggesting that men are a “class” and that the nice ones need to do something about the horrible ones actions. And that’s ok because there’s loads of men and they are not a minority group.

It’s woke/davina cancelling/bandwagon behaviour I can’t stand. With this... with piers Morgan, with race, mask wearing, royal family, with brexit. It’s exhausting. Next week there will be a new topic.

The gang-related stats, the knife crime stats, still come under the heading ‘male violence’ - there are literally no losers if we tackle male violence. None. But we can’t do that if we’re too worried about offending your stepdad on his way to buy a paper.

Also regarding knife crime and gang-violence, there are targeted campaigns around young men who are likely to be approached by gangs, or likely to carry a knife. There are Muslim organisations who combat radicalisation by working with offenders to stop it happening again. These are things that already exist.

There are no campaigns that I can think of that are male-led that target specifically violence against women. Not one. Why is that?

But men are a class.

Just as women are.

Black people; black men; black women are

All sorts of cohorts of people are formed from distinct parts of society.

From the term classification, having similar attributes.

It's not a slur.

@2021ismyyear

If men as a sex class do not want to be viewed with fear and suspicion due to the actions of other members of their sex class what are they prepared to do to change that?...

Read that back and insert another group or “class”. I give up! I’m off to spend Mother’s Day with the evil men in my life whilst they plot hideous things.

Out of interest - did you grow up in the UK?