Page 20 | Stepmum and mothers day

Thattimeoftheyearagain · 2021-03-11T13:19:49+00:00

Stepmum here! A nice one I like to think. I am not mum but I do a lot of mum duties for them Aibu to be recognised on Sunday? Not as mum but just a thank you for everything I do? I know its mothers day but its not like there's a step mothers day?

Mountainash · 14/03/2021 01:37

I am a Stepmum and fortunate to be well and truly loved. I get treated like a Queen on Mother’s Day. I have two step daughters and the youngest and I are very close. They are both in their thirties and have made me the proudest Mum/Grandma in the world.

BeenNeverSeen · 14/03/2021 09:46

Obviously some very insecure Mums on here, some who probably have every reason to hate on step Mums. Every situation is different but my step daughter wouldn’t have thought to buy me anything as a child, and I would never have expected her Mum to organise anything! Her Dad & I always made sure her Mum had a card & gifts. Now she is a (wonderful) adult & buys me thoughtful cards & gifts every year. It means so very much as I know I have no right to expect it. I think it’s a long game with step children. They didn’t ask for the situation they are in but many will look back as adults & understand far better, the dynamics involved, for good or for ill. My step daughter certainly has a different perspective as an adult to the one her mother portrayed to her as a child & has made up her own mind on who have been positive role models in her life growing up. If everyone put their children’s happiness first, there would be a lot more well adjusted people in this world. It’s the hardest thing to do sometimes but is almost always worth it. I am not my step daughter’s mum & have never tried nor claimed to be. I think being a step Mum is a privilege and a very special relationship in its own right. How can a child possibly have too many people who love them & look out for them? @Thattimeoftheyearagain You may have to wait a few years but It will be worth it when it happens, I promise 💐

FuckyouBrennan · 14/03/2021 10:12

@BeenNeverSeen brilliant post

funinthesun19 · 14/03/2021 10:20

If you're not their mum - and you are stressing that you don't want to be their mum - why do you want a mother's day card?

That’s the thing, I never did want one.

OhamIreally · 14/03/2021 10:31

@OhamIreally

I like my stepmother and buy her a card. I buy my own mother one out of fear/guilt as she always kicks off on Mother's Day. YANBU OP.

Realise it's a bit up myself to quote my own post but wanted to come back and confirm I had a lovely text saying thanks from my stepmother and a complaint from my mum that I hadn't sent flowers (I sent a card and what I thought was a thoughtful gift). Same every bloody year.

FishyFriday · 14/03/2021 10:59

Well my crappy husband has been a dick all morning and is refusing to even acknowledge that it’s Mother’s Day. He’s currently decided that I don’t get to spend the whole day with my baby because he wants to present him to his other children as a toy to play with (that pretty much seems to be the idea).

I’ve been Googling flats to rent while counting down the minutes til he takes them out for their nice day out. Happy Mother’s Day to me.

Obviously he can’t acknowledge Mother’s Day or his children might realise and then they’ll say they don’t want to see him. But he could just do the right thing and take them to see their mother instead.

Candyfloss99 · 14/03/2021 11:08

@FishyFriday

Well my crappy husband has been a dick all morning and is refusing to even acknowledge that it’s Mother’s Day. He’s currently decided that I don’t get to spend the whole day with my baby because he wants to present him to his other children as a toy to play with (that pretty much seems to be the idea).

I’ve been Googling flats to rent while counting down the minutes til he takes them out for their nice day out. Happy Mother’s Day to me.

Obviously he can’t acknowledge Mother’s Day or his children might realise and then they’ll say they don’t want to see him. But he could just do the right thing and take them to see their mother instead.

I hope you find a flat xx

KatyGreen111 · 24/02/2022 10:30

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LouisaM100 · 07/03/2022 12:55

Step mum here...I don't expect anything either but they always make a fuss for me on mothers day which is nice. I do the motherly things for them so a day off, flowers, cake etc is nice to be given on this day.

Nothing wrong with what your saying.