To expect my 10 year old to make his own breakfast??

[Blueuggboots]

My 10 year old tells me what he wants for breakfast every morning and then expects it to magically appear in front of him.
He is capable of making toast, beans on toast, scrambled egg, cereal including porridge in the microwave but does require support with the grill which I am happy to provide.
When I tell him to make it himself (which I've been doing for well over a year!!) he gets really shirty.
Would you expect your 10 year old to do this for themselves?

Oops don't know why it only posted some of it.
He can make his own and doesn't expect it, same with his lunchbox.
It would be different if he refused to make his own or was demanding about it

Yanbu, When my youngest was 4 I became disabled and struggled to do many tasks, especially at the speed a child wants them done. All 3 children were 10 and under and started doing much more than making their own breakfast. Infact my youngest now 12 makes me tea and toast every morning without complaint.
I think dc need to know your expectations and then you need to stick to them.

If he can do is safely, then yes, unless I was making for myself at the same time, I'd expect him to do it mostly.

I think it's a great way of encouraging independence and he'll thank you later in life when making himself a yummy breakfast is easy. His future partners will also benefit. Too many men lack confidence/skills/responsibility in the kitchen.

My 9 year old would make her own cereal or toast yes.
She helps with other food prep

Explain to him why you think he should make his own breakfast. That you want him to be independent and capable and that he is growing up and is old enough.

Is it possible that he is feeling upset or unloved? Kids do a lot of comparisons - Maybe his friends' parents all do the food prep for them and he feels a bit resentful? It's important to talk to him about why and that it comes from a place of love.

My 7&9 year olds get their own breakfast but only have cereals, fruit or yoghurt. My 9 year old gets everything out the cupboard and they both carry it through to the table and sort themselves out. 9 year old also makes his own lunch but 7 year old only makes sandwiches. On a week-end 9 year old makes the jusrol croissants and pain au chocolate for us with supervision when putting in and taking out the oven. Both children get up an hour before us most days and we go down and they’ve opened the curtains, had breakfast and tidied it away.

My 9 year old got the hump yesterday cos l told her to cut up her own banana- she has been doing it for years but yesterday it was just too much responsibility!

God I feel like the old one out here. My DD is 6 and has never got her own breakfast. I can’t imagine letting her loose with a toaster or microwave, and she’s a really sensible child too!

Old? ODD!

Both my DS’s make their own breakfast if it’s something like toast or cereal. If it’s the weekend then I usually make them a cooked breakfast on one of the days and occasionally pancakes on the other. Sometimes if they aren’t feeling 100% I’ll offer to make them something but no5 as a rule.

Wait until he is a teenager and wants you to make it "cos it tastes better". In fairness DD14 is a pretty good cook and makes meals for all of us so I don't really mind.

But absolutely at 10 I would expect him to be able to make breakfast. How else can you expect breakfast in bed on Mothers Day?

Absolutely. I worked at a nursery for a number of years, and from as young as 2 the children would chose and (some with assistance in pouring milk etc) make their own breakfast

@Luckyrabbitfoot

God I feel like the old one out here. My DD is 6 and has never got her own breakfast. I can’t imagine letting her loose with a toaster or microwave, and she’s a really sensible child too!

But you don't let them loose right away. You stand over them, show them how to do it and are on hand in case something goes wrong.

Then, once they're used to it, you can get them doing it on their own while you have a lie-in or have a shower or whatever. Then you get them to make you breakfast in bed

My DD is quite lazy so the most she would do is cereal or toast. But I have started to wonder if I am the lazy one for expecting her to make it and not do it myself, so I am glad of some of these responses.

God I feel like the old one out here. My DD is 6 and has never got her own breakfast. I can’t imagine letting her loose with a toaster or microwave, and she’s a really sensible child too!

I never made my DD get her own food alone at 6 - I would probably feel like a bad parent else. But it’s always good to get them involved. I remember mine would get the bowl and spoon or help me stir things etc at that age but I wouldn’t stay in bed whilst she was making her own breakfast!

Not currently relevant as my DTs are only toddlers. However, as their mother, I see it as one of my roles to provide them with their meals so, no I won’t be expecting them to make their own breakfast (or any other meal) at 10 years old!!

@Rememberallball

Not currently relevant as my DTs are only toddlers. However, as their mother, I see it as one of my roles to provide them with their meals so, no I won’t be expecting them to make their own breakfast (or any other meal) at 10 years old!!

Why would you not want to help them be independent? At nursery and wraparound care they will be expected to help or sort their own so why would you not prepare them for that? My 9 year old loves cooking his own lunch and making me a cup of tea. He also helps chopping vegetables for meals and I see it as a great thing that we’re preparing him for the real world and adulthood on a gradual normal progression scale. I’d hate him to turn 18, ready to leave for uni then oh shit we’ve never taught him how to do it.

My 13 year old son can’t even butter bread he rips through it. He tried to make himself tea and lifted a used one in the wee caddy beside the sink 😟 I have tried but he lacks common sense even though he gets all A grades at school. My 9 year old is not as academic and can make breakfast lunch tea and coffee. I trust her a lot more around hot things than my son. Even making cereal half it is over the floor and puddles of milk 😣

I like to send 14 year old off to school with a cooked breakfast. Sausages, bacon, hash brown tomatoes and egg. I cook it for him. He packs fishes into dishwasher. He can cook but I tend to do breakfast for all who want it.

You've done well to have your 10 year old able to cook those, well done. My 11 year old can pour himself a bowl of cereal. However if asked to do it himself "im not hungry". I have to force him and stand and watch him or he wont get any. By which point Ive wasted my time standing there and also had the argument about him not being hungry. This is a war I need to fight (for both our sakes) but, on top of home schooling 3 children and working full time from home, its not the hill I want to die on right now.

@caringcarer

I like to send 14 year old off to school with a cooked breakfast. Sausages, bacon, hash brown tomatoes and egg. I cook it for him. He packs fishes into dishwasher. He can cook but I tend to do breakfast for all who want it.

Cor can I come live with you

@Flyingf1edgelings I have tried but he lacks common sense even though he gets all A grades at school.

this is exactly my son! i saw the dr a few years ago as he was extremely clever but would do things like walk outside and then take 5 minutes to realize he had no shoes on. Or put his sisters (pink) coat on instead of his (black) one and not realize. Just bizarre behaviour. The DR basically told me to suck it up and said sometimes clever children have "more important" things going on in their heads and overlook the trivial day to day mundane things. He has got better with time but finds "everyday" activities very difficult.

Yes my 10 year olds make their own breakfast and most of the time, their lunch too

@caringcarer

I like to send 14 year old off to school with a cooked breakfast. Sausages, bacon, hash brown tomatoes and egg. I cook it for him. He packs fishes into dishwasher. He can cook but I tend to do breakfast for all who want it.

Do you accept guests?

I was getting my own cereal but my kids have eggs for breakfast don't know how I would feel with them using the cooker at that age...... we'll see, still a few years to go