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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DH is being a dick with the pram?

289 replies

Sheeeeeep · 01/03/2021 18:13

Ffs.

Dd 4 months. Sod all to do at weekends other than go for walks.

We have a baby carrier but DH is obsessed with the pram and insists on putting the poor child in it trudging through thick mud, clambering up mountains and hills and clattering over bumpy gravelly roads.

My nice pram is covered in mud and people look at us like we are batshit.

AIBU?

OP posts:
yaybacktoschool · 01/03/2021 18:32

I do lots of mud in my pram, cleaned it once in two years! Not really a big deal. You'd be moaning if dad didn't do anything!

Dipi79 · 01/03/2021 18:34

LTB 😎

HmmmHmmmm · 01/03/2021 18:34

You are majorly over reacting.

SleepingStandingUp · 01/03/2021 18:34

Well can you not just get baby out the car seat and put her into the carrier / if he gets there first take her out and put her in the carrier? I can't see how it's even vaguely safe trying to push a pram up and down a mountain

PurBal · 01/03/2021 18:37

Yeah. He's being a dick. And I'd look at you as though you were bat shit. Sling, carrier or off road pram. DS not here yet and we've decided to get a secondhand one despite not being entirely convinced we will use it over the carrier. Sounds like he's feeling a little out of his depth with the sling, may need a gentle word perhaps?

Original poster
Sheeeeeep · 01/03/2021 18:37

Believe me we get ‘what the fuck are you people actually doing to that child’ looks!

DH does not use the pram in the week, that is me. Therefore it is either down to me to clean it or my car that gets covered in half the contents of every bog from mountain and moorland.

maybe he wants a turn pushing his baby

He could do that in a park or similar, couldn’t he?

OP posts:
TrustTheGeneGenie · 01/03/2021 18:37

You're being petty. I wouldn't agree that's if less safe than a carrier on rough terrain..

You buy a pram to use it not to look at it.

Original poster
Sheeeeeep · 01/03/2021 18:38

I’m sleep deprived sleeping - whaaaaat? Grin

OP posts:
MadameButterface · 01/03/2021 18:38

he should be open to compromise wrt using the carrier or taking more buggy friendly routes, and he should always be cleaning the pram if he's the one insisting on taking it through the mud. he's the person you should be taking this up with though, not the randoms of aibu. if there's a reason you can't do that, then you have bigger problems than muddy pram wheels.

extentioncord · 01/03/2021 18:38

Yeah. He's being a dick. And I'd look at you as though you were bat shit. Sling, carrier or off road pram.

DS not here yet

Maybe wait until he is until you judge others for perfectly normal behaviour Hmm

Original poster
Sheeeeeep · 01/03/2021 18:39

@yaybacktoschool

I do lots of mud in my pram, cleaned it once in two years! Not really a big deal. You'd be moaning if dad didn't do anything!
What the fuuuuck? He shoves our baby up a mountain once a week and that’s the extent of his parental duties?
OP posts:
ShirleyPhallus · 01/03/2021 18:40

@Laiste

I thought you were going to say he always tries to push it along with one hand ...

(men look such dicks doing this. Trying to look carefree/casual? Who knows, but it always makes me Hmm)

It's not for long OP. With kids every stage passes quickly. This will too. Have you got one of those 3 wheel jobbies?

What’s wrong with pushing the pram with one hand? Mumsnet is so weird honestly

I push it with one hand and carry my coffee in the other. Didn’t realise it made me look like a dick. Not entirely sure how

Sirzy · 01/03/2021 18:40

Why not just look for a second hand all terrain buggy to use for walks? Will get a good few years out of it

brokengate · 01/03/2021 18:40

Such an issue where we stay that I have a farm pram covered in mud and my Oran which stats in the car unless on Tarmac!! Both second hand, just more practical for here.

ShirleyPhallus · 01/03/2021 18:41

@PurBal

Yeah. He's being a dick. And I'd look at you as though you were bat shit. Sling, carrier or off road pram. DS not here yet and we've decided to get a secondhand one despite not being entirely convinced we will use it over the carrier. Sounds like he's feeling a little out of his depth with the sling, may need a gentle word perhaps?
Ha ha ha ha ha

The most perfect parents are the ones who aren’t parents

SleepingStandingUp · 01/03/2021 18:42

@Sheeeeeep

I’m sleep deprived sleeping - whaaaaat? Grin
Take the baby out the car and put her in the carrier.

If he puts her on the pram, take her out and put her in the carrier.

When he moans tell him it isn't safe and you're pissed off he never cleans the pram

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 01/03/2021 18:42

Soooo much internalised misogyny on this thread!

Praising a man for accompanying his wife on a walk with the baby?

Commenting that "if he's good now he will be better down the line". Why do have and accept such SHIT standards from men. Ooh he's not abandoned his child, he's not doing a crap job, round of applause Hmm

Original poster
Sheeeeeep · 01/03/2021 18:43

@Sirzy

Why not just look for a second hand all terrain buggy to use for walks? Will get a good few years out of it
£££. Maternity pay.

Got you now sleeping

OP posts:
Snowymcsnowsony · 01/03/2021 18:44

I paid £70 for a 3 wheeled off road Aussie branded pushchair.. It managed the rough terrain of Scotland holidaying for 3 years!! And our local beach when at home!!

ineedaholidaynow · 01/03/2021 18:45

I would think someone was mad using a pram walking where we live if they go off the main track and use the sheep paths and try and clamber over rocks with it, especially if it is not a terrain type pushchair. I remember when DH went for a walk with DS when he was very little and went on established footpaths in the all terrain pushchair and then came up against a stile!

Ellpellwood · 01/03/2021 18:45

I'll be honest - some of my worst parenting experiences so far were when DS, between 5 and 10 months of age, decided mid-walk that he was too hot and had had enough of the carrier. If you have no pram, carrying them like a rugby ball in front of you is not fun.

SleepingStandingUp · 01/03/2021 18:46

@extentioncord. @ShirleyPhallus

Maybe wait until he is until you judge others for perfectly normal behaviour hmm

The most perfect parents are the ones who aren’t parents

I have 3, I also think he's being a dick. Do I get an opinion as I have lots?

He's trashing a pram that isn't designed to be hauled up a mountain and CBA to even clean it. When op wants a new one he'll be all "but the last one cost us X, why haven't you looked after it!!"

YoniAndGuy · 01/03/2021 18:49

@Sheeeeeep

Yeah. By me.
Oh no. By Man Who Insists On Pram.
Harrysmummy246 · 01/03/2021 18:50

Exactly why we had a carrier/ sling. Dog walks, every day, not hard surfaces. And so much easier to deal with the dogs etc.
We did a trip to rome without anything but the toddler tula. So much easier at the airport too.

Nanny0gg · 01/03/2021 18:54

@Sheeeeeep

I’ve got two james but thanks, that’s a lovely offer Flowers
All I think would be handy is for you to have a stick to make sure you keep your balance.

I think a pram is madness

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