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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed my husband doesn’t want to buy gloves for our baby?

263 replies

Peridotty · 22/02/2021 05:26

My husband is doesn’t want to buy new winter gloves for our baby. He doesn’t think that they’re worth it as she won’t get much wear out of them before winter is over. He wants her to wear a few pairs of socks on her hands instead or buy a used pair. AIBU to think he is being too stingy?

OP posts:
yogamatted · 22/02/2021 10:44

Regardless of the merits of gloves for a baby, unless you are really watching the pennies you should not need to check with your husband whether you spend money on clothes for your baby.
Do you normally have to check with him before buying things??

ChancesWhatChances · 22/02/2021 10:45

@SheCannaeTakeNoMoreCapt Scotland is where. Last week we had -6 degree weather with a shitload of snow.

Lemmeout · 22/02/2021 10:46

Socks on her hands if it is actually cold. Otherwise they are to male you feel like you tried because gloves don’t stay on.

Lemmeout · 22/02/2021 10:47

Make ... not male.

But I agree with pp. why you are seeking his permission. Is he usually a control freak?

Highfivemum · 22/02/2021 10:50

15 pounds is a lot however if u do lots of outdoor walks and they are good quality I would rather that than cold hands. I do think ur DH is being awful. I wouldn’t ask permission of mine to buy gloves for our baby. Maybe look at cheaper but don’t be talked out of something ur baby needs.

saraclara · 22/02/2021 10:52

@Lemmeout

Make ... not male. But I agree with pp. why you are seeking his permission. Is he usually a control freak?
Read the backstory further up. OP clearly has a spending habit and then some.

If the OP was posting about her DH spending like this, no-one would accuse her of being controlling.

VinterKvinna · 22/02/2021 11:02

@Peridotty

She is 8months old. Won’t be playing in the snow as she can’t stand or walk yet. She likes to be carried by me in the carrier. Her coat doesn’t have mittens built into them. We went on a walk today outside and when we got back her hands were freezing! Am so worried she will get frostbite. Thanks for your replies about the socks being okay. Will try them first then. I’m happy and surprised to hear that he is not being stingy lol.
Where are you in the world?
yoyo1234 · 22/02/2021 11:15

Sleepsuit with gold over cuffs and socks. Nice and cosy. £15 baby gloves!

Crappyfridays7 · 22/02/2021 11:19

I don’t even pay £15 per pair for my 10/11 year olds!! They like cheapo primark gloves and fine if one gets lost as you have plenty spare. Imagine losing £7.50 worth of glove if one falls off and you don’t notice! Who is going to know they cost £15..why are they £15? Seems excessive to me. I just used to stick fuzzy socks on when mine were little and we lived in the north of Scotland even without there was never any frostbite. It’s 11 degrees here today lovely sunny day so no need for gloves/mitts/socks.

Original poster
Peridotty · 22/02/2021 12:53

Wow so many replies!
I think he was a bit concerned that I wasn’t going to bed yet and he asked me what I was doing. I said I was online shopping so he was slightly annoyed at that since I was supposed to be going to bed after I had finished doing some studying. He came over to see what I was buying and I said ‘gloves for baby’. He then said he felt it wasn’t necessary and seemed like a waste since by the time they get here she might only get 2 more uses out of them and they’re so expensive. I don’t earn money but I have my own credit card that’s linked to his bank account. He likes to know what I buy as he likes to have some say in it and he hates having to return things if they’re not right.

I thought that £1 gloves wouldn’t be warm enough from my personal experience. I was gonna buy North face or Patagonia etc that were on sale.

OP posts:
shouldistop · 22/02/2021 12:55

He was annoyed you weren't going to bed and he likes to see what you're buying? He sounds quite controlling op.

Original poster
Peridotty · 22/02/2021 12:56

Haha some people have been digging! Yes I bought 75 board books but actually I bought another 8 since that post lol. The mats and playpen are naturally expensive aren’t they though?
I like to spend money on baby but not on myself.

OP posts:
Original poster
Peridotty · 22/02/2021 12:57

@shouldistop he was slightly annoyed since I said I will go to sleep when I’ve done studying but then I stayed up to do online shopping (which to him can wait til tomorrow). We argued about the gloves for a little while and then he said we will discuss about it tomorrow.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 22/02/2021 12:58

It does sound like this is just part of a pattern of excessive spending then

Nanny0gg · 22/02/2021 12:59

@Peridotty

Haha some people have been digging! Yes I bought 75 board books but actually I bought another 8 since that post lol. The mats and playpen are naturally expensive aren’t they though? I like to spend money on baby but not on myself.
You clearly buy what you like no matter what anyone says.

80+ board books is utterly ridiculous and I would think from a developmental POV totally pointless. The fun with babies is when they join in and start 'reading' back with you.

lazylinguist · 22/02/2021 12:59

Sorry but £15 for a pair of baby mittens is ridiculous.

Ohnomoreno · 22/02/2021 13:01

We have a range of gloves, none of which are the slightest bit of use... I'm with your DH.

Same4Walls · 22/02/2021 13:02

@Sirzy

It does sound like this is just part of a pattern of excessive spending then
That's certainly how it's coming across to me too.

Your child is 8 months old, she simply doesn't need half or even a third of the stuff you're buying her. My DS is 14 months and I've spend hardly any money on his toys and clothes 99% of it is second hand.

I'd be concerned you were spending so excessively and how that will progress. Especially when this is quite possibly the cheapest age to clothe and entertain them.

Starlightstarbright1 · 22/02/2021 13:07

Hard to know £15 for some people is money that doesn't matter for others its half a weeks shopping.

I do think it sounds like you are looking for the best of everything.. The temperatures are rising so no I wouldn't bother at this time of year.. get some next autumn

FossilisedFanny · 22/02/2021 13:10

Your baby won’t care what they’ve got on their hands , £15 is a ridiculous amount of money to spend on something that probably won’t get worn and if this is a pattern of excessive spending, I’d be a bit pissed off too .

HandforthParishCouncilClerk · 22/02/2021 13:12

Judging by your previous threads you seem to have a habit of buying batshit expensive stuff that a baby simply doesn’t need.

WhenISnappedAndFarted · 22/02/2021 13:22

I agree with all the overspending remarks.

To the posters who thinks her partner is controlling her - do you think she'd have been able to buy even half of that stuff if he was?

£15 for a pair of gloves does seem excessive to me.

C8H10N4O2 · 22/02/2021 13:22

£15 for baby mittens is mad at this time of year in the UK. Basic types are fine and I remember using socks as mittens or having all in ones.

I remember your other posts about buying huge amounts of stuff that babies never really use. Honestly stop buying so much stuff - she won't remember any of it and the money would be more useful in her college fund/future needs fund.

MRex · 22/02/2021 13:22

£15 is ridiculous. Get a £7 pack of multi-coloured magic mittens. You'll lose some over time, but they'll fit for years. Or use socks if the baby's tiny still.

diddl · 22/02/2021 13:24

Maybe your husband earns mega bucks, Op & I get that it's family money, you're looking after baby so saving on childcare etc, but do you not feel any responsibility at all to spend wisely/carefully?

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