To want OH to stop policing my baths/showers

[H3llohEll0]

I'll preface this by saying I have good personal hygiene, so it's not that. I shower and bath regularly.

He usually works during the night but when he's off he does this every time.

I could be in the middle of a book or doing work on the laptop and he'll say "ill run your bath now"

I never ask him to. It's a nice gesture but not always convenient.

Sometimes I just don't want one, or want to be left to my book/tv programme/work. Maybe I'll only want a quick shower later on.

If you were in the middle of something and your DH tells you when to get a bath would you find it annoying?

How are you supposed to initiate sex if you want it are we no longer allowed to try seduction genuine question Are you seriously suggesting that persistent groping, followed by a statement that it is now time for her to have a bath, is seduction? Because your question reminds me of all of those men who piped up when #metoo first started, asking how they were supposed to talk to women if they were no longer allowed to sexually harass them. If a husband or wife does not understand the difference between seduction and sexual harassment then they are the one with the problem.

Umm a smack on the bum is perfectly normal couple behaviour actually I have seen plenty of threads on here to know this fucking hell obviously if it's not welcome it's an issue but if the person. Is never told its not welcome well.... And exactly how many times does she need to tell him that she doesn’t like being groped before he can consider himself ‘told’? She’s told him again and again that it’s not welcome. His response wasn’t to listen to her. It was to trample all over her boundaries until she wasn’t able to tell him ‘not anymore, because of the consequences. That is NOT perfectly normal couple behaviour.

Ugh so many apologists for out & out nasty, sex pest behaviour. You people need to get better standards and stop allowing this type of man/yourselves to be such gropey arseholes.

Calling it seduction is just vile. Shame on you.

What billy19 said. These men are 10p a punnet.

OP not back, busy playing Mum to his kids and then he'll maul her to service his knob the second they're out the door. What a catch.

@MrsArtyPants Yes, couldn't agree more, I have had to say this to one or two people who think that non physical stuff is okay 🤔😵
Been there, was even forced to have his child. Still not through it all, a long way to go yet, but great when I started reading little snippets on here and elsewhere all put together helped me to tell him to F off!

Ugh so many apologists for out & out nasty, sex pest behaviour. You people need to get better standards and stop allowing this type of man/yourselves to be such gropey arseholes.

Calling it seduction is just vile. Shame on you.

100% agree @Ninkanink, I can't believe how some of these posters think.

Another woman who took up with some guy who has kids and is a sexpest. There's a reason why these men became single.

What a bizarre generalisation. What have the kids got to do with it?? My DP with 2 kids became single because is exW cheated on him repeatedly. But of course, all men with kids are "creepy sex pests" and that's that.

Please don't use femfresh. Evil stuff.

That's it. I've officially read it all.

@BobbidyBob

I’d never come across so many people that can’t communicate effectively before I joined MN.

In my relationship, we’d sit down and have a discussion about this - I’d explain how I felt and how it seemed to me like it was about sex rather than the bath, about how even if that’s not the intention it makes me feel uncomfortable etc. I’d expect the outcome of this to be DH not telling me when to bath again in future, and if he did I’d tell him we already discussed it and to stop. If he persevered after that then it’s a real problem. I wouldn’t be trying to “break associations” or doing the mental equivalent of whacking his nose with a rolled-up newspaper. He’s a human, not a dog, and an open conversation until the situation is resolved is surely more appropriate.

Entirely agreed.