AIBU to think all Mumsnetters are on top of life admin

[Southern]

Just that really, it's been a bit hectic lately and I feel like I have fallen behind on stuff. I read some threads for tips on here and most MN'ers responses were quite scathing towards those who weren't on top of life admin which to be honest, made me feel like a bit of a failure. Is everyone on here on top of everything and always goes on comparison sites to check all their quotes etc? The amount of form filling just fills me with dread and sends me on a procrastination loop (which is why I am here typing this probably)...... for those who are on top of it, when do you do it?

Quite. I mean it's not a 'term' I'd heard of until a couple of years ago, but I can't see what is offensive or pretentious about it confused . Not sure why it is okay to use a 'coverall term' for something like 'housework' or 'gardening' or 'decorating' but not life admin.

Because when you say "decorating" it means quite a same thing to everyone.
But as shown on this thread life admin isn't actually "admin" for quite a few people. Some count only standard paperwork stuff (hence the bafflement and obviously everyone with half a brain knows it's different for people with disabilities or carers. Just making sure that comes across since it's apparently not an automatic assumption I thoutgh it is), but some count things like shopping and "housew9rk" or planning housework etc.
This is why there is the friction

If you know what the words life and admin mean, you'd have to be being disingenous or wilfully obtuse not to understand what life admin means tbh.

@lazylinguist

If you know what the words life and admin mean, you'd have to be being disingenous or wilfully obtuse not to understand what life admin means tbh.

No you wouldn't. I know what both words mean and yet I wouldn't put shopping or clothes shopping as that🤷🏻 I run businesses and going to cash and carry is not "admin". Nor it is at home

I like the expression life admin. I always have a list of things to do with a few items. I got a lot done at the weekend but current list is, off the top of my head

Organise MOT
Rearrange dd piano lessons
Buy 2 birthday presents
Buy new cooker hood and Organise fitting
Buy new wardrobe
Sell old wardrobe
Repair 1 toy and 1 item of clothing

Not sure if they are all life admin though! I'll fo some but then other things will be added. Some of them are quick jobs but it all adds up and mostly has to be done post 9pm when kids are in bed.

I think there is life admin and life stuff. Now the latter can absolutely be overwhelming at times!
Things break in threes🙄 so boiler, roof, appliance in my case within few weeks🙄
But admin is that. Admin.
Sorting that is life stuff crap .
Paying the invoice is life admin.
This is why people are scratching their heads. Not because everyone is nasty abelist thing🤷🏻

@dinglehopper1 I think we are actually trying to say the same thing 😂

I include meal planning as life admin alongside writing up the weekly calendar that goes on the fridge door. Ordering school meals, paying for music lessons.
The list of things to do that extends and contracts by a page every month.
Making sure that everyone knows what they are doing and when.

Life stuff is just life admin to me. But I see the meaning of admin as organisation & management.

I run businesses and going to cash and carry is not "admin". Nor it is at home

when I was an admin assistant one of my tasks was the weekly trip cash & carry for kitchen supplies.

We will have to agree to disagree

Well I was a waitress who was asked to cook small things often (part of the job), still doesn't make cooking a waitresing, does it.

However, I agree that we will have to agree to disagree😁

Lucasleeseybrows “These are all two minute jobs! Not even once a month for most of them. I do wonder if the women waving their hands in the air about so much ‘life admin’ are SAHMs trying to justify their existence.”*

They are not 2 minute jobs though. You can easily spend an hour or two looking for a new policy or contract if you do it properly. Comparison sites are a good starting point bit often don’t cut it as there are to many variables and just not enough info, you at least need to read the t&cs before committing and that alone takes much longer than 2 minutes.

Some people are better at this stuff than others and the OP is not alone. No need to be snarky if you don’t struggle. Good for you. People are not all the same. People saying they have a lot of life admin and struggle to fit it in aren’t all SAHM who are trying to justify their existence. Sometimes they are single mums who work full time and feel like they have a lot of balls in the air!

Definitely not on top of it! Fucking on hold with three little ones is horrendous.

^Nope. I’ve never been on a price comparison site in life. Everything goes out by direct debit. I’ve no idea if I’m paying more than I should.

After setting up direct debits some 4 odd years ago I don't think I've even read any of my physical bills let alone had to do so much work on them it becomes an official "chore/job" for the rosta grin

But surely neither of you are really ignorant, or naive enough to think that everybody can afford to do that ? hmm^

Exactly this. Just setting up your gas and electric, broadband or insurances on direct debit and forgetting about them for years on end will mean that you're paying 30, 50 or even 100% more than you need to, because that's how the market works. Apathy costs.

Some people can't afford to be so neglectful about their household management, whatever you call it. Others recognise that putting in more than the absolute minimum effort can reap significant financial rewards that will make a real difference to their standard of living. It's not make work for the sake of it, chances are the differences in costs add up to quite a lot.

Just this morning, I saved £7 by having the right card to pay for an overseas transaction without the card holder or Paypal taking a cut of the exchange rate. I got my broadband bill down by nearly half with one single 10 minute phone call, the list is endless.

And as for never looking at a bill, lets hope your provider doesn't make a billing mistake somewhere along the way, which is alarmingly common, because you will have no idea when it happened and it will take hours to unravel, if you don't notice until they tell you that you owe them thousands, or they owe you thousands, but are refusing to give it back to you.

Meal planning is definitely life admin and usually costs a lot more if you don't bother to do it.

No food in the house when you are hungry, you're more likely to get a takeaway or use the expensive local shop, or take the time to go out to a 'proper' supermarket and spend £50 on things you don't need but catch your eye and then gets wasted because you don't have the other ingredients needed to make them into a meal and the cycle continues.

Thanks for the comments here everyone, it does make me feel a bit better that others are not on it all the time and it's not just me.

For the people on top of it, are you on top of things like your pension, looking at monthly statements (esp given the value of everything has fallen now), making top ups if you need to etc (I haven't dealt with this), if you are lucky enough to have ISA's have you done something about them now the interest has fallen? Actually reading your insurance T&C's when you get them to make sure you're covered (I had to call about a claim yesterday and I wasn't covered for something I thought I would be as I hadn't added and paid for that extra) and had to check the policy doc with the man on the phone and he said it's complicated and most people don't know the info off hand. Do you all have a will and statement of wishes that's been signed and witnessed, have guardians in place for kids. Sorry if that sounds morbid but a lot of life admin and paperwork does require that time and I included all that in my original thinking which I probably should have clarified. All of these mostly one off but need a regular review and I count as being on top of life admin

And I meant to add life insurance and whether the cover is adequate? Will it leave enough? I can't do this without speaking to someone on a call. All of these things I also count in life admin (in this case literally). All of this is on top of the day to day stuff which I think takes enough time as it is

southern yes I've done all the things you mention there like will, power of attorney, direct cremation paid for, pension sorted. To me they are vital things every adult should make a priority.

Thanks @auntiemarys. When in life did you get these things sorted (and everyone else who did? And those who haven't). I'm 40, have 2 under 5, work full time and I'm getting there but I've not got everything you've done in place

It's just part of life isn't it? I have no idea if I'm doing it right or not. I think I'm paying the cheapest price for everything, my bills are all direct debit. Not sure there's much else for me to do.

I'm the most organised person I've ever met and even so, I am behind atm! I just can't be arsed. I've been on holiday this week (staycation ofc) and all I did was nothing. I planned to read - I didn't, planned to watch tv series, I didn't. I did exercise and kept myself afloat with my diet, but other than that NADA.

Tbh I quite like the term "life admin" lol. It's just plain organising, daily life shit but sounds fancy. I am unfortunately quite busy with a ft job & second uni degree + all that random shit such as random appointments, exercising, etc.

It cost from £30-£40 an hour to employ a private PA
whose tasks are advertised as anything from dealing with bills and tradesmen to running errands, dealing with deliveries, getting house ready for a sale, party planning, organising your photos and everything digital, organising all travels etc etc...

and admin assistant can reasonably be expected to deal with organising lunches/ sandwiches, birthday cards and presents..

It's only on MN that posters need to argue for the sake of arguing

OP, yes, I am on top of all the things you listed. Everything regarding children and will was pretty much before they were born, and we just finalised will and their own passports etc.. in the month after they arrive. That's what maternity leave is for.

It was unlikely I would die in childbirth and DH in a car crashed, but will etc were done.

There's no secret.

Make a list and deal with things 1 at a time, until everything is in order.
Every time you tick an item, organise some kind of reminder for the next term/year or whatever.

Then deal with things as they come. If you are genuinely too busy with work or something one evening, do it the next.

It's exactly like anything else. Some people are happy with an overflowing basket of clean laundry, others deal with it there and then and it makes their life easier.

If you have time to watch tv or be on MN or any other social media, you have time to organise your life.

If you were paid at work to do it, you would get on with everything, and get it done.

I am laughing at people pretending that there's no admin involved with kids at all for example. I am genuinely on top of it because I order things the day I get the warning from school etc.. but most parents complain about the never ending request and special days in Primary!

I always wonder how people have so much 'life admin' to do

For me, it’s all the shit that seems to fall to me.

Food shopping, meal planning.
We need a new office chair, a new computer battery.
I need to round up the old computer and bits, plus a load of old batteries and find somewhere to take them.
Kids want hamster food ordering.
2 cars need insuring, mot, servicing, house insurance all renews in jan. plus self employed forms that we need to do even though neither of us are se anymore.
Liase with the accountant to get it all submitted.
Plumber for toilet leak. Find out we need to take the bathroom apart, it’s old anyway so plan, find the money and organise new bathroom.

It’s just constant. I’ll sit down and someone will say “while you’re on your phone can you add x to the shop” or find me y in amazon and order it.

Then I have everyone whinging that I haven’t ordered y, and have I rung the plumber to find out when they’re coming. Which seems to triple it.

For everyone saying Dh should take on more, he’s severely dyslexic and can barely write a comprehensible email. If he’s left to order online we get fuck ups like ordering ebooks instead of physical books, or the wrong size laptop battery, so then I have to sit and organise a refund and exchange.

I always wonder how people have so much 'life admin' to do

Two reasons, probably. They have a different life from yours and they categorise more things as life admin than you do.

My life admin isn't too onerous, partly because I work part-time and partly because it's shared with dh. If I were a single parent working full time with young children it would be a completely different matter.