AIBU to think all Mumsnetters are on top of life admin

[Southern]

Just that really, it's been a bit hectic lately and I feel like I have fallen behind on stuff. I read some threads for tips on here and most MN'ers responses were quite scathing towards those who weren't on top of life admin which to be honest, made me feel like a bit of a failure. Is everyone on here on top of everything and always goes on comparison sites to check all their quotes etc? The amount of form filling just fills me with dread and sends me on a procrastination loop (which is why I am here typing this probably)...... for those who are on top of it, when do you do it?

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Tbh thpigh. How often do people buy toaster or tv... This is the problem with these threads. As I said before. It will always sound overwhelming when people put in 1 post 12 months+ worth of admin.

Also, I am quite concerned about how mamy people here needed emergency vet in lat few days😱 Is February pet cursed month?

We had an emergency vet visit last week! Cat came home with a bleeding paw. Toe pad coming off. Now in a cone and banned from going outdoors for 7 days. Now I've an unplanned visit to a pet shop to try and get a soft cone and some cleaning solution (to deal with the protest/stress peeing!) 2 litter trays on offer so not that.

@therocinante

I've got inattentive ADHD, I've never been on top of any 'life admin' whatsoever.

I've got a pile of stuff I need to post, stuff to take to the tip, 2 parking tickets I need to pay, a doctor's appointment I've been pointlessly putting off making even though it would take me five minutes, and a pile of unopened post on the coffee table I will probably ignore until it's no longer relevant then shove in a drawer...

Same!

Life admin as a phrase makes so much sense for me. I have a military background and am used to phrases like
Field admin as in "get your fucking field admin sorted out. Your drills and skills should be shot hot by now"
Field admin is everything you need to do to life safely and healthily in the field. So cleaning your rifle, cleaning yourself. Changing your socks. Going for a shovel recce (a poo). Take your rifle everywhere you go and be prepared to bug out at a moments notice. Make sure your cam cream is good (hundreds of other things too for field admin)

Military also used the phrase 'personal admin' as in "get your fucking personal admin sorted out"

So life admin is a perfect phrase to me.

@OverTheRubicon - I agree totally.

When I worked pt I could keep up with life admin more or less in half a day a week (4 hours), I think this is around average, the other half day was meal planning/ supermarket shop.

On an average week with 2 primary school aged DCs this consisted of:
1)Purchase of present, card and wrapping paper for weekend birthday party (sometimes done in bulk not not always)
2) 2X forms for school eg; school trip, parents, evening.
3) Other school admin (checking inset days, arranging childcare/ school assembely/sports fixture etc)
4) Purchase essential random item eg; children in need outfit/ red nose day/world book day/ lost or outgrown piece of uniform.

DH does the utilities
We each do our own cars, DH does mortage.

@MrsMoastyToasty - is that when he puts the book in the freezer? I definitely feel like chucking all the PIP etc forms in the freezer!!

@CandyLeBonBon - those who think every job takes a couple of min have obviously never claimed UC or PIP or many of the things on your list! One phone call can take a couple of hours out of your day and as a result of that call there are then 2 more to make ...it can literally be never ending!

@Sapho47 - well, yeah - it is very ableist. It shows a complete lack of empathy to poke fun at those who struggle. Often it is those most unable to deal with it end up with the admin that takes hours because they have an illness/condition. To suggest that those people are making it up to look busy is just horrible!

@UndertheCedartree yes!

crackerofdoom I hear you with the dinner decisions. I don't even do the cooking but have to come up with ideas, check the stocks and top up if necessary then aid and abet during cooking.
We moved at the end of august and I've decided NOT to put bills on direct debits because we've been in the situation before when they should have been cancelled or adjusted and haven't and we just lost track of them. I'd rather pay as we go as it's very easy online

I have appointment fatigue. Making them. Going to them. Following up on the next steps.

Since September we have had no fewer than 3 and up to 7 appointments every single week between me and the DC (mainly DS1). Dr, dentist, orthodontist, ophthalmologist, neurologist, and various other specialists.

Even in 2019 we had a minimum of 2 appointments every bloody week.

And these aren't just recurring ones. Often they're one offs that I need to book and occasionally re arrange (like when we were self isolating).

Life admin in this house consists of the two of us spending the odd five minutes checking a bank account or something. When the kids are at school/college occasionally there's something to do there. Appointments are a quick phone call then write in calendar.

I doh t we spend even 30 mins a month.

Obviously it's different for parents of children with special needs, but for the vast majority of adults it is a miniscule amount of time.

Generally in here I find that it is something that some women do (and it is women - say life admin to a man and get a blank look) to justify whatever it is they are wanting to justify at that time. I do remember seeing on here that sorting photos was added to a list of important life admin type things and that made me

I do remember seeing on here that sorting photos was added to a list of important life admin type things and that made me

Why would that not count? I have similar on my list. My relative died of covid & I want to print some photos of them with the dc & frame them.

Some days most of my life admin tasks are for me or the cat or DD who does not have SEN. So it isn't really because of having a DC with SEN.

I'm quite good at getting my life admin done in general but I'm always forgetting something off the list. My panic is that one day something important will get missed. I forgot to renew my breakdown cover recently - didn't think it was urgent so put it to the bottom of the list - and then found myself with a completely flat battery yesterday morning. I'm now out of pocket due to mismanaging my admin.

Its definitely not just checking bank accounts and direct debits like some seem to think - some people have very straightforward lives - its sorting various appointments for the DC and myself, school stuff, planning and booking holidays, DC birthday parties, sorting through various documents, mortgage, car stuff, getting quotes and booking trades people to do various things like a boiler service or fix a fence. Fixing broken things round the house, sorting stuff to take to the charity shop. Anything that needs to be done to keep things running but isn't day to day housework, parenting stuff.

Choosing a photo to frame isn’t bloody admin of any sort!

Why not?

I will go through my phone, upload to snapfish or whatever, post some prints to relatives & then frame & hang the ones I like. Comes under my admin umbrella

Generally in here I find that it is something that some women do (and it is women - say life admin to a man and get a blank look)
so the mental load IS a thing....

to justify whatever it is they are wanting to justify at that time.
I am curious why you feel so snarky about things? At best you should congratulate yourself on being more efficient than others, why are you so triggered by others who have to spend time on things?

When the kids are at school/college occasionally there's something to do there. said no parents with kids at school ever.

It’s not an admin task of any sort. I’d anything it’s a design task. And this whole concept is such bollocks. It’s part of this whole misery agenda of how everyone is so busy these days. It’s just stuff that needs doing and it’s a darn sight more convenient to do than it ever was.

And does anyone actually sit on hold on the phone for 2 hours, do you not put it on speaker and get on with watching coronation street while you wait?

As I said earlier people can make a cottage industry out of anything!

a design task? that sounds even wankier!

Also whether it's called admin or a design task why would that change the impact it has on someone's time?

It’s just stuff that needs doing. yeah admin 😆

Never knew anyone who’s suffered as a result of not putting a picture on display. Don’t count that as stuff that needs doing. If you don’t enjoy it don’t do it but don’t make out you’re a martyr if you do. And I agree about design task. Ridiculous concept isn’t it 🙄

Life admin is a bit like curating an outfit. You’re putting clothes on like every other fucker in the history of the world has to. Stop trying to make it a Thing.

Never knew anyone who’s suffered as a result of not putting a picture on display.

Well I think it's a nice way to remember a dead relative but yes won't suffer. But would I suffer by not meal planning or not going on holidays? No

I personally don't make the connection between suffering & life admin. For me it's just stuff that needs to be done for my life & family & some bits are more boring than other bits. Doing it doesn't mean you are a unicorn though.

and it is women - say life admin to a man and get a blank look
tbf two years ago if you said "life admin" to me you would get a blank look and I don't have a penis...

Nope. I’ve never been on a price comparison site in life. Everything goes out by direct debit. I’ve no idea if I’m paying more than I should.

After setting up direct debits some 4 odd years ago I don't think I've even read any of my physical bills let alone had to do so much work on them it becomes an official "chore/job" for the rosta

But surely neither of you are really ignorant, or naive enough to think that everybody can afford to do that ?

I honestly don't understand why people are so scathing about the phrase 'life admin'. What's so 'pretentious' about it? It's a short, handy phrase which simply means organisational tasks relating to your house, home life and family rather than work.

Quite. I mean it's not a 'term' I'd heard of until a couple of years ago, but I can't see what is offensive or pretentious about it . Not sure why it is okay to use a 'coverall term' for something like 'housework' or 'gardening' or 'decorating' but not life admin.

Re Drs and other medical appts
Why on earth would you do that? It's almost certainly going to be inconvenient by the time comes around.

Because it is the only way to get an appointment. Also, as you then remember - if you leave your dentist appointment or something that only comes round occasionally for months, it would probably go out of your mind. If you need a regular GP appt, then you have to book in when you are there for the previous one, or you wouldn't be able to get one at the time. It really can't be that difficult to understand.