AIBU to think Covid has improved my life?

[Hellsbells35]

When I look back at my life a year ago, I am so grateful to be in the position I’m in now. But the changes wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t for the pandemic.

Firstly I was furloughed for several months and able to spend more time with my kids. Homeschooling last March was tough but it made when the kids went back in June feel easier.

I was then made redundant but found a better job100% remote and more money. A situation I could only dream of before!

Throw in mortgage breaks, and less nursery fees and I’m more financially stable than before.

I used to have fomo but now I’m enjoying spending time just with husband and kids. Our marriage is better than ever as we now work at home together.

Zoom quizzes have me catching up with friends I’d not seen in a while and building better relationships.

I obviously have lost freedom and hate to see so many deaths but aibu to be grateful for what it has done to my life?

Same here. Dh went fulltime 100% remote, got a job promotion, we moved to another country in Nov and now live in the glorious countryside. Life is really good, but only because we took the risks and grabbed the opportunity

Oooo op didn’t you know you’re not allowed have it better than others on Mumsnet and actually say it out loud?!

I think it’s great to see some positivity come out of all this. Not everyone has been as fortunate obviously but it’s so nice to see it has been for some people. I’m happy for you op

I think people being harsh to the OP are missing some of her post. Like the parts where she was furloughed and lost her job for a start. She has gone through the shit and come out the other side. Good for you OP! Some people haven't been as lucky. But I do think that you need to focus on the positives of a situation otherwise you will get dragged down into misery and despair. Which I think is what has happened to a large proportion of MN unfortunately.

I have benefited from the current situation. Like lots of other people in the world have. I have e lost family this year, so I will take all of the positives that I can from the shit show that has been the last 18 months of my life thank you very much.

I don't think this is an unreasonable post. I have really bonded with my teens. We haven't had much choice. I've managed to save money and get a professional job following the demise of my cleaning business.
On the flip side I have suffered a covid death in my wider family, I miss my parents and travelling. I'm worried about our future - the economy and opportunity esp for my children. It just hasn't all been shit.

Yanbu lovely to read a positive post

I’m happy for you, OP. I hope things continue to go well for you.

Taking time to reflect and count your blessings is a good thing. I think in such a dire year, if we don’t try to find positives, it will take us down.

Mine are smaller positives than yours, OP, but they’re still there if I look for them.

More than 114k people have died but yes it’s really great that you’re enjoying zoom quizzes. For goodness sake have some basic compassion.

This thread is a bit like standing up at a funeral and announcing to the crowd "my life's great at the moment, I feel so happy" it's insensitive as fuck.

People aren't being miserable or putting Op down to point out that crowing about your own happiness in the face of tragic events is misplaced.

I love positivity and people bringing optimism to others but this isn't that.

YANBU must it all be doom and gloom? If a poster says they’re feeling down everyone jumps onto say it’ll all be over soon and yippee here comes the vaccine.
I think it’s a great post, you seized the opportunities life presented!
I miss holidays, but I can now work remotely, when I want to work more I can and this gives me more time with family.

‘114k people have died’ you do realise people die every day, all over the world from war, famine, sickness, cancer etc (yet miraculously no one seems to have died from anything other than covid in the U.K. this year ....) does that mean you never take pleasure in anything!

This thread is a bit like standing up at a funeral and announcing to the crowd "my life's great at the moment, I feel so happy" it's insensitive as fuck.

Its nothing like that at all. FFs Are we only allowed to say we're miserable now?

The OP has not posed that the pandemic is a good thing, nor is she ignoring the deaths and harm. But bloody hell, it's fairly normal human behaviour to look for positives at a dark time. Every weekend paper supplement for the last year has been wall to wall of positive suggestions of how to fill time, save money etc. As for the payment holiday, timing is everything. I haven't done it but actually it would make more sense for me to plough my mortgage payment elsewhere for a few months, pay off something else and then settle in for the much longer haul with the mortgage. It might be the same for the op. If you want doom and gloom wall to wall, the Corona virus board is that way >>>

Come on, "Covid has improved my life" is a crass statement, however people try to dress it up as counting your blessings, or "taking pleasure in things".

It's completely lacking in compassion.

Your marriage is better than ever because of being stuck working and living together? Lucky you. Mine’s on its arse.

whoamongstus

"Mumsnet: Oh god we're so sick of the doom and gloom
OP: posts something nice
Mumsnet: NO NOT LIKE THAT GET BACK IN YOUR BOX HAPPY PERSON"

It's a bit more complicated than that though isn't it?

I like positivity but there's a lack of emotional intelligence and sensitivity at play when someone sticks something like this out without any caveats or sense saying: "I'm jolly happy about all this".

As someone else said upthread its a lack of ability to read the room. If you went to a gathering of people who had all just got divorced and one person was wielding a huge diamond engagement ring congratulating themselves loudly on their forthcoming marriage its not out of order exactly but you might just wince a bit on their part. This is what this post feels like.

I'm aware that COVID-19 has been good for some people -- every cloud has a silver lining and all that. But I honestly feel that if you're lucky enough for it to have been actively good for you you keep a dignified silence and maybe confess to one close friend. I don't really see what's to be gained by putting it out here other than just making people resent you a bit.

But this is all a bit fresh for me and I may not be being that objective.

I would not say a mortgage break is good for your finances, you may struggle to remortgage or if you want to move, certainly not desirable.

But I'm glad everything else is working out for you.

I am happy for you OP and I wonder if those posters criticising you thought about what time was like before covid, people were dying then, people lost their jobs then, did that mean you couldn’t be pleased for someone else then as well? It never ceases to amaze me how everything is just about covid now, but we’ve always had deaths and job losses, it’s funny how when something has a potential impact on you then you care about someone else having a better time but when it didn’t impact you, you lived your lives as normal.

I think what grates with a lot of people is the sense that we are not all in this together. It is human psychology to compare circumstances and it is our relative wealth rather than our absolute wealth that often governs how content we are with our circumstances.

In the case of covid it is very unfair how it tends to be the lowest paid in the most vital jobs taking most of the risks and suffering the most in terms of income and physical and mental health.

I think those in more fortunate circumstances need to have more compassion and understanding for others around them who are often facilitating their priviliaged position and this means not advertising their priviliage.

I might have enjoyed it had I been furloughed and not had to combine home schooling with working full time so congrats OP. Alarmed at you thinking a mortgage break is a plus (the interest accrued must be frightening), but then I have a feeling you've posted to be goady, so aren't that happy after all.

I have read dozens of threads of people saying they’re not coping etc, how shit this all is and each time someone tries to say something positive they are shut down and told quite firmly that it is ok for people to be miserable about all this. Now I don’t disagree with that. But you can’t have it both ways. If people are “allowed” threads full of negativity, then you can’t complain if someone starts one of positivity. If you don’t like it, scroll past. Go to one of the threads where people are complaining, there are plenty of them.

Throw in mortgage breaks,

Not such a great thing. It just increases the overall cost of your mortgage.

Good to hear the positives. Good for mental health to remind ourselves of positive change.

The pandemic has resulted in a much more peaceful and enjoyable life for us, too, OP. However, I wouldn’t have posted about it, as I know most people haven’t benefited from the situation. Glad to see more of a balance on the votes though.

We’ve both worked from home throughout. I love spending more time with DH and our DC. The biggest tangible benefits are saving 3 hours each per day now we’re not commuting. Also, our usual commuting (train/tube) for the two of us used to cost £750 per month (so a massive £9k saving by the middle of March!).

I’m looking forward to life going back to some normality, but won’t regret the time we’ve had together. It’s been amazing from a bonding point of view and also appreciating what we’ve got.

@thepeopleversuswork

Exactly this.

You are counting your blessings in my book -
Good for you - don’t let them drag u down 😊