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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Made to feel guilty as I’ve had the Covid vaccination!

299 replies

DottyDonut · 04/02/2021 18:22

So I have a teen DC (CEV) who was vaccinated against Covid yesterday, I was with him and was offered one too as the clinic had quite a few cancellations apparently. I certainly wasn’t expecting it so was caught on the spot but thought I’d be pretty stupid to turn it down so had it.

I mentioned it to my sister who was quite pissed off saying it wasn’t fair! She has since told her husband and I got a sarcastic message from her SIL this morning asking me if I was proud of myself ‘jumping the queue’ and how did I deserve to be so lucky. No, I’m not lucky to have a DS who’ll never live independently Angry. She not very nice anyway and I know she has been really scared of getting Covid as she’s very overweight but this is really nasty isn’t it?

I didn’t do anything wrong. Would anyone have turned it down in my shoes?

OP posts:
visitorfromtheplanetzog · 04/02/2021 20:20

Same thing happened to our neighbours. She can't drive and her DH took her for hers. They asked him if he wanted one too since he was there.

It saves their time apparently.

mineofuselessinformation · 04/02/2021 20:24

I'm a bit perplexed as to why they are annoyed, other than they are jealous.
But even so, knowing your DS is vulnerable, what would they have done in your shoes??? Yes, take the opportunity, the same as you did.
I'd actually reply to their messages and put them straight.
Something along the lines of 'I'm struggling to understand why you're so offended. Would you have said no in the same situation?' might encourage them to learn to engage brain before opening mouth.
I'm pleased for you on a personal level, and also glad that a vaccine dose didn't go to waste.

acatcalledjohn · 04/02/2021 20:26

If the choice is between throwing away a vaccine or giving it to someone because they happen to be in the right place at the right time, why would you waste it?

They should be ashamed of themselves for their behaviour towards you.

ittakes2 · 04/02/2021 20:26

Ummm by protecting yourself you are protecting your vunerable teen. She's a dick - excuse my language. You need to ignore. If you had not have had it - it would have gone to someone else in the queue!

HazelBite · 04/02/2021 20:32

I got a phone call from my GP's today saying if I could get into the surgery in the next 15mins I could have the jab as they had some people refuse/not turn up in the over 70's category.
I'm late 60's and said yes please!
I have friends and relatives who happen to be older than me who haven't had it, I don't feel guilty at all just very lucky.

KeyboardWorriers · 04/02/2021 20:36

You did nothing wrong. Far worse for the vaccine to be wasted. Plus if you get very ill I imagine that would be very tough for your DS.

Viviennemary · 04/02/2021 20:40

I agree you would have been wrong to refuse. You did the right thing.

PurpleWh1teGreen · 04/02/2021 20:40

You are a priority. You wouldn’t have received a vac if you didn’t meet the criteria and in your case you qualify because you are a carer.

Frazzled2207 · 04/02/2021 20:41

Yanbu. You’re the carer for a CEV person. You should be in a priority group for that reason tbh.

Italiangreyhound · 04/02/2021 20:42

You didn't do anything wrong and I can't imagine anyone being stupid enough to turn it down.

You aren't lucky to have a child with an illness. But you were out there protecting your child and you got a small bonus in that you.

Ignore your relative.

Thanks
Staffy1 · 04/02/2021 20:43

You didn't jump the queue, you were offered a vaccine that might have otherwise gone to waste. If you are a Carer, which I'm assuming, with a CEV child, you would probably have been called for one not too long from now anyway.

Shesellsseashellsontheseashore · 04/02/2021 20:44

Allocated vaccines that aren't used are wasted and thrown away. It was perfectly sensible for them to offer it to you and perfectly sensible for you to accept it.
This pandemic has brought out the worst in some people.

saraclara · 04/02/2021 20:47

Maybe I should have gone in with him rather than wait in the car, and sod the extra risk to me, DP, and other people from me unnecessarily going into the vaccine centre 🤨 Because as we all know, a carer has to stay within 30cm of the person they care for at all times."

@NoIDontLikeTrains, my friend WAS waiting in her car in the car park while her CEV husband was being vaccinated at the end of the day, when a volunteer came out, asked her if she was 'MrsDH's name', and said that they had three spare vaccines and would she like one.

Higgeldypiggeldy35 · 04/02/2021 20:48

Would she have turned it down in your situation? Unlikely! Don't feel guilty at all. She's a pratt.

Spied · 04/02/2021 20:49

I'd have had my sleeve rolled up before they were finished asking me.

ChocolateSantaisthebestkind · 04/02/2021 20:49

All carers should be offered it. The government does not have the resources to provide care for the amount of people receiving familial care. It is a scandal but they have allowed it to happen so they have a duty to protect all the unpaid carers, whose selflessness and resiliance allows then to avoid a mass scandal! Would your whining relative be able/willing to provide the care you provide were you to fall ill? If not, they should wind their neck in! Angry My nephew has profound additional needs and if anyone were to say something similar to his parents, I would be disgusted!

WalrusWife · 04/02/2021 20:50

Why would anybody be jealous over a vaccine?

m0therofdragons · 04/02/2021 20:53

At the clinics we’re grateful not to waste those from non attendees (so many no shows it’s outrageous). I’ve been vaccinated as I’m classed as frontline nhs although I’m not clinical I go to clinical areas including icu and a&e. I still have a relative annoyed I’ve been vaccinated because she doesn’t understand my job. Senior nurse vaccinated me and chief medical officer in my trust instructed me to have it due to my role and vaccines being available and about to go out of date due to defrost times. This meant I was vaccinated in the first week. I told family only and still one got shitty.

PeggyHill · 04/02/2021 20:55

Your sister and SIL are both nasty bitches. Make it a goal to stop caring what they think - because they sure as shit don't care about you and your well being.

Colorindex · 04/02/2021 20:57

It’s doesn’t keep! I’m working at a hub and at the end of the shift any left over vaccine is offered to staff or volunteers. There’s never much left as they’re tight on drawing up doses and very few no shows, so maybe 3-4 shots left over.
Don’t feel bad we’re vaccinating some extras too as we go, on a case by case basis.

BloodyDarrener · 04/02/2021 20:58

I've read a few times that unused vaccines are discarded.

Perhaps you need to tell your family this. The 'cancelled' vaccines would not have been used on a higher priority person unless they happened to randomly walk in before they closed for the day.

MiniMaxi · 04/02/2021 21:00

You did nothing wrong and it’ll help protect your son

WhenISnappedAndFarted · 04/02/2021 21:00

I took my DM to have hers today - wish I'd been offered one! I have asthma so can understand your sisters worries however she should be pleased for you. I'm absolutely made up that my DM has had it and if I were your sister I'd be made up that you and your DS had it.

Ignore her. She's jealous and I can understand why but it's still not your fault

Emilyontmoor · 04/02/2021 21:01

It is happening everywhere. The vaccine has to be used in a certain number of hours and people don't turn up plus there is bunce in the vaccine phials so they often can make more doses. Glad to hear it went to someone so deserving. Ignorant SIL. I have heard of jobsworth throwing it away as well as it going to young staff.

Mittens030869 · 04/02/2021 21:01

I'd have had my sleeve rolled up before they were finished asking me.

Me too! What is to be gained by wasting a vaccine??

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