To want to hear about those kids/teens who are stoically getting on with lockdown

[DuchessFerrara]

Not taking a pop at young people with SEN or MH issues. It must be heartbreaking to watch them endure the isolation and frustration of lockdown.

I would like to hear about the DC who, like my Yr11, don't feel as though their lives have been decimated. Aren't aggrieved to be making sacrifices for the "oldies". Don't feel their education has been wasted because their exams have been cancelled.

I'd love to hear about those DC who are knuckling down to their studies without too much complaint, are optimistic for the future and are - for the most part - pleasant to be around.

Whilst in this country we haven't had a pandemic situation in our lifetime, this isn't something that hasn't ever happened before. Albeit rarely on the global scale.
There has been MERS, SARS, Ebola in recent years - Ebola is still flaring up and much less treatable. Flu remains a significant shortener of life in the UK every year.
Go back a few centuries and it was common for richer people to move to their country retreats to avoid disease and keeping to your own household during outbreaks was something they were probably used to doing every year.
There is precedent for a lot of what we are experiencing and populations do recover.

My primary/ secondary DC are doing pretty well. They would like to go back to school and see their friends but they are settled into a routine of home learning and after school dog walks each day then a more relaxed weekend. At least they can get up a bit later and there isn't any homework. And because there are 3 of them they have a bit of company and can be silly together.

It's a good thing to hear that not everyone is struggling. I'm sorry for those that are but we should be allowed to share different viewpoints and experiences.

There is not a precedent for taking children out of society altogether, and for months and months on end, period.

Our children here in the UK have been locked down so far approaching eight months out of the twelve, they do not see their friends, teachers, schools or even people inside a supermarket! No one at all, with the exception of their immediate family.

There is not a single example of this in modern history. Children were not locked down in this way during Ebola nor Sars on this kind of scale or for length of time. So I do not agree with your incorrect assertion that there is precedent, there most certainly is not. As someone not experiencing a lockdown with children it will be hard for you to understand just how strict it is, and how hard it is for families Bea

@speaksofty one hundred percent agree

I do have a child at home speaksoftly she certainly hasn't been cloistered at home for 8 months. She follows the rules, but sees a friend socially for a walk at least once a week, has interactive contact with teachers and school friends 5 days out of 7. She was in school from September to December. She chats with friends online and takes part in sports and music lessons on zoom. If your children haven't had any contact with anyone other than family for the last 8 months then that is your choice, not a necessity.
We also have older children not living at home and have not seen very much of them in person for a year, but we are still in frequent contact.
It's been very different, but we haven't stopped having social contact, education and connection with people.

I have 3. DS1 is 17, DS2 is 13 and DD is 9. None have had any issues. Middle kid loves home schooling, and will be sad to return to class room, the other two would like to go back but are just doing what they need to do without any great hysterics.

(oh and we've been no where in lockdown at all, no friends local for the kids either as they travel to school anyway)

bea My children take walks with friends but they come back quite quickly because we have had torrential rain almost every day, and they are soaked through.
On line chats and zooms are no replacement for face to face interaction and connection. Both play sports still in the gardens as we are lucky to have a good set up at home. Even with all of this - they are still going to be the first generation in the world, in history to be locked away for this long. We don't even put convicted child criminals in isolation by themselves.
If you take the first lockdown, add the second, and then the third - it comes to nearly eight months by March if you live in the UK. So yes your kids will have been locked away for that long too if you work it out.

The point is none of us know what the consequences will be. It is a huge live experiment. If you feel comfortable with it, great, I would prefer a normal childhood for my kids. Healthy outside sports, friends, sleepovers, parties, holidays, school and fun weekends. I want that for them, not unreasonably.

Speaksoftly, some people are just superior at this lockdown thing you just have to bow to them really

@ThenCatoJumpedOut

Speaksoftly, some people are just superior at this lockdown thing you just have to bow to them really

Maybe they're just more resilient generally and/or have been through challenges in their lives that make the current situation not so difficult for them to deal with.

My 8 yo dais doing so much better than last summer. Mainly down to the fact he has to send photos of his work in each day, He get great comments each day but never get a mention in the daily roll call or his pictures shown on Artworks. I can see he is getting deflated but l just give him little tasks and rewards myself. I haven’t let him slip from his routine once so has to get dressed and start work at 9am as l feel like that would be the point it starts to go wrong. Well done to all your children.

I would much rather a normal childhood for my dc. We miss family and friends a lot. I’m one of those people who would rather be out with dc than in. We were always out doing things, meeting friends or family so this is a struggle for me.
It’s not a competition of who’s best at lockdown. That’s ridiculous. Everyone is trying to cope with it because it’s an adjustment for everyone.
I feel like I’ve had to try hard to make sure the dcs adjusted as best as they could. I read all the threads here, looked at lots of online stuff, read loads about things to do and tried to incorporate all the things that people deemed important. We even baked bread and painted pictures.
It’s not a matter of slotting into lockdown for everyone, but taking it day by day and trying.
No doubt someone will come along and say that I’m smug or implying that I think other people didn’t try or something but it’s fine. I know it’s harder for a lot of others.

@unicornparty my d’s is exactly the same. I know I am very lucky. He has done so well during lockdown, just goes to show how chatty he is during school!

My two girls (12 and 14) are absolutely fine. They socialise online do their work and exercise every day. They are good company too to be fair.

My kids are fantastic too for what it’s worth. At those magical ages 12 and 10 where they’re great company, get on with each other (occasionally) and can work fairly independently while I’m on Teams calls etc. Don’t get me wrong there is way too much screen time going on and we’ve all had moments where we’ve felt a bit bored or fed up but I’m so, so proud of them and how well they have coped.

The point is none of us know what the consequences will be. It is a huge live experiment. If you feel comfortable with it, great, I would prefer a normal childhood for my kids. Healthy outside sports, friends, sleepovers, parties, holidays, school and fun weekends. I want that for them, not unreasonably
Of course it's not unreasonable and I too want a return to normal, but the thread was about kids who are doing ok under lockdown 🤷

DS1 is year 10 and he prefers it. No disruption, it takes far less time for him to do the work. I do worry about his friends because he took 4 years to really find his people but they aren’t social outside of school so now he has no contact. He is unbothered and just focussed so it’s my problem and not his. He is very able though so doesn’t require much guidance so likes that the teachers introduces the lesson then they need to crack on. He also says he is doing far more work, that might be teachers overcompensating.

DS1 year 8. Also seems very happy in spite of being very very social before. He does need some guidance and is less focussed and able but he is a gamer and so is staying in contact and said he likes being at home. This also might be because he is a bit lazier and sometimes might do the minimum and in school he would be pushed more. It has picked up though and he is content.

DS3 year 5. He doesn’t really like school so this is his dream come true and he regularly tells me I am a better teacher. I am not at all but I am not sure he is relevant to this thread because it’s skewed by the fact he doesn’t really like school anyway. He also games a bit so is very happy.

We also don’t have a garden and live in a city but they all seem fine and happy.

Dd2 is 10. She's in year 6 and is just getting on with things. She's quite happy not to have to walk to and from school by herself (our cm retired in the summer ☹️). She likes being able to work from her bed. She really, really likes not having any disruptions while she's learning. She does miss her friends, but she facetimes them and they play Roblox together.

Most of the pupils I teach in secondary school are getting on with things and handing something in. Whether they are doing that happily or grumpily I have no idea, because I'm not in their house, but they seem ok in the online lessons.

My two are superb. I'm so proud of them.

At 8 and 12 they just get on with it; they have to as I'm teaching all day. I'm surprised and so proud of their maturity and grit.

They are both still doing dancing/scouts/brownies/other activities via zoom which helps too.

My 2 also seem to be doing well. Of course they would love to be back at school, getting together with their mates etc however they are using what is available to them to keep in touch. We are lucky however in that they have plenty of space, access to technology, great online learning.

I may be a mean parent and I do listen when they are down however I also talk openly about other people and how difficult it is for them. I try to make them see that whilst it's difficult, they should try and appreciate what they have and look forward to getting out of this. As each day goes by we are nearer to that goal.

I think this is partly an introvert vs extrovert, homebird vs social butterfly issue. A usual pace of life by most people's standards was overwhelming for my kids so we have always taken things slow and easy and therefore lockdown hasn't been such a huge change in our lives.

I do question the joy of on line brownies or whatever, how fun is that after eight hours of on line lessons?! Surely you not want your child off the screen and doing something practical away from the screen when lessons end guy? The idea that they spend all day on a screen with their school work, and then the same again with after school 'activities' to me is extremely unhealthy. Even too much zoom is again screen based, and we don't know the damage this is causing to our children's brains, development and eyes.

Surely baking, doing crafts, writing letters or painting is better than 12 hours of screens with back to back lessons followed by more screen time activities. I don't get it.

I am not sure how any parent, regardless of how their kids are faring can think this is any substitute whatsoever for a 'real life' and a proper childhood.
Some people seem perfectly happy with it, worryingly.

Speak I feel the same as you about it

@speaksoftly my DC have done baking, biscuit decorating, scavenger hunting, Lego challenges, bingo games, science experiments, dance and exercise activities during their Beaver/Cub/Scouting Zoom sessions and those are just the ones I can think of off the top of my head. They have a lot of fun and a lot of laughter.

The communication forum is via a screen but they are doing a lot of activities that make them get up and do fun stuff during those calls.

Yes, it's not ideal, and yes, I'd rather they could go to the scout hut and meet in person. But hey, they can't, and this is a damn sight better than nothing. I am in awe of the scout group leaders tbh. They have done the most amazing job.

None of this is a substitute for a 'real' life but it will fill in the gap whilst we're in this situation. It's better than nothing, and I would rather look on the positive side of things tbh.

Why has a positive thread turned into one trying to convince all the posters on it how horrible it really is for their children? Aren't there enough threads already for that?