Homeschooling is impossible- end of my tether

[Edenspirits]

Both DH and I have keyworker status - I teach full time at a university so the department of education have given lecturers keyworker status and DH works shifts in a blue light call centre.

But the school have said they have no spaces as they are full.

I broke down today in tears as I am trying to teach live and plan my lessons and DD who is 8 is on her own most of the day and I have no time to school her. She needs my support and isn’t old enough to do it on her own despite trying to set her work. My lectures can be up to 2 hours.

I feel like I am neglecting her as she is mostly watching TV.

aibu to feel like I am going to have a breakdown if this continues for much longer.

Xpost. So it doesn’t have to be done at a specific time. So can wait until you or DH aren’t working.

I don’t know if you have the technology to support it or a suitable friend but my Dsis has come up with what I think is a brilliant idea for her DD. She and her partner are also both working full time from home and have little chance to help with school work so each day she sorts out what work there is to do and then lets her video chat with her best friend and they both try to do the work together. Of course there is an element of them getting side tracked but equally, her DD feels like she’s working alongside her friend and my Dsis doesn’t feel as bad about having to ignore her for most of the day. It seems to be going quite well still and she came up with the plan not long after schools were supposed to go back.

I hope they are at least providing a decent mix of live and/or video lessons. If they know that youre WFH then they know that you can't home school beyond being supervisory at the same time.

Agree with PP you need to report to your Local Authority as you are entitled to a keyworker place, working from Home is not a reason to decline your dd attendance at school.

that's really hard. I'm a teacher too and send mine in for their keyworker places because otherwise I just can't keep all the plates spinning. When mine are here for any reason, I grab as much as I can at the start of the day and print off sheets and PP so they can do stuff while I teach and they just have to miss the live bits for the most part. If that was every day I'd be in serious trouble with my own school because on the days they are here I barely "phone in" a 15 min live intro then set work for the (secondary) kids to get on with. Please try and be assertive with the school, or ask them to record the live lessons and post it up so you can access it later (we do this at my school).

I agree with making more noise with the school.

The whole thing is completely impossible though. So unfair on child and parents, especially mothers.

Meant to add that I totally get your worries and frustration though. This while situation is shit and practically quite impossible for most people.

Can you go into work and teach from an empty office there? Thus are at work.

I go into school and teach from
An empty classroom when it’s my days to teach online

Our local Primaries are encouraging children to ‘work’ together on topic work/projects.

Have you got any relatives willing to help out over zoom?

Have you looked at Oak Academy?

Reading is always good. There are some good maths apps/games.

Get her to do some writing practice, even if it just a letter to Grandma

I'm working from home and home schooling. It's bloody impossible.

You demand that key worker space you're entitled to and don't let anyone guilt you out of it. You are not any less deserving.

It’s shit times, the weathers shit and you are trying to spin so many plates....can’t other any advice as we are in the same position (not key workers) 💐

You aren't failing her. You are doing your best in an awful situation, which hopefully will be over soon. Cut yourself some slack. Let her read things that interest her, watch things that interest her, and encourage some writing.

Other options - does she have any friends from her class that you could form a childcare bubble with, and so some of her homeschooling there? Or, if you can afford it, can you find a local high school or uni student who you could pay to come and tutor / work with her for a couple of hours a day to make sure she gets through the things you regard as most important (maths, English?)? That's allowed, or if you are nervous about it being done in person, you could even do it over zoom.

If the school don’t have space, they don’t have space.

The keyworker spaces at school aren’t there for key workers who can’t home school and wfh, they’re there for key workers who cannot have their children at home while they work.

It is tough, but lots of non-key workers can’t do a brilliant job of home schooling while also wfh.

Your dd isn’t unsafe and you are still able to work.

@OverTheRainbow88 sadly we aren’t allowed over the uni threshold or i would be in like a shot!

Oh thats awful Eden,

I get a few minuets break a day so for instance I would start a 20 min video and do 10 mins, then another 10 mins as and when, in my lunch break I am doing about 40 mins of work with her also.
Please dont worry about the tv!
What can she do or cant do?
Like I said is she a reader? Can she write Ok..

If schools have a risk assessment that limits the numbers then they can’t accept more pupils

For those who are saying 'make more noise' - while I agree with this, there are so many schools simply refusing (ie. unable) to take any more children than they currently are. I'm in the same situation as OP - but DSs school have point blank refused to take children if either parent is WFH and refused challenges from several parents.

it's not always as straightforward as making some noise. yes, the children suffer as a result (and parents too, mentally) but it doesn't make the school places suddenly appear.

I'm increasingly feeling like it's time for women (and yes, it seems that the burden falls on us) to to say no. No, I'm not home schooling as well as my job and all my other caring responsibilities. It isn't working.

Either kids are at school or it's paid parental leave.

Enough.

@minniemango

If the school don’t have space, they don’t have space.

The keyworker spaces at school aren’t there for key workers who can’t home school and wfh, they’re there for key workers who cannot have their children at home while they work.

It is tough, but lots of non-key workers can’t do a brilliant job of home schooling while also wfh.

Your dd isn’t unsafe and you are still able to work.

The OP is struggling and entitled to a place.

The LA will find a place if necessary at another school.

What happens when keyworkers start to go down because of this?

In your position I would try to set things up at a point in the day when you are free (maybe first thing?) so that she can access as much as possible independently. Eg, I assume the school provide some sort of timetable with the bitesize links so you could open that up for her so that she can click on the links herself. Then print the pdfs out so she has access to them and she can work through to the best of her ability.

My DD is 8. I can give her the school's timetable with the links to the videos or powerpoints she needs and she is capable of following the instructions to click on the links herself. Then she has a stab at the work herself. When I have some free time during the day I try to help her with anything she's got stuck on or correct her mistakes.

Why not find her so ne books to read? If all the kids out of school spent tiime reading it would do more for their progress than anything else.

@whiteflores

I'm increasingly feeling like it's time for women (and yes, it seems that the burden falls on us) to to say no. No, I'm not home schooling as well as my job and all my other caring responsibilities. It isn't working.

Either kids are at school or it's paid parental leave.

Enough.

Agreed.

Hey.
I don't know what your daughter is learning topic wise. I am a teacher of her age group and our school are doing pdfs with videos alongside. For example, I am making my flipchart and then recording over it as if I were in the class with them. This seems to have really helped. I know it makes some more work you a bit but could you look at other schools in your area and see what they are providing online as it may be the same as my school and lots of the children can do it themselves with the video guidance.
I'm sorry you are in this position, it is really horrible. I hope this helps a bit.

Alternatively, leave the school learning and use Oak Academy for her year group. It won't necessarily be the same as her school is doing but it will be following the curriculum. All of the lessons are talked-through videos and she will probably just need paper and a pencil. My DC were able to work through these without any help in the first lockdown when they were 9 and 7.

The DfE actually withdrew keyworker status from lecturers who are working from home. You're now only eligible for a school place if you're teaching face-to-face.

The problem was that the DfE initially said that everyone working in a university was a keyworker (in the case of my university that would be 7,000 people, a small proportion of whom actually teach). They withdrew that a week or so later. So now those who actually need to teach complex material live online are screwed. Some are being told to take annual leave, unpaid leave or furlough. God knows where this leaves the students they are supposed to be teaching.