To ask for a pat on the back RE weight loss - sad about DH's reaction

[FluffyBlueJumper]

Since mid-October I have lost a lot of weight (over 4 stone). I have gone from a size 18 to an 8-10.
DH has not said a thing, so yesterday I playfully asked him to feel my back, because all the padding has gone.
The only thing he said was "Ew, your skin has changed, it is like old lady's skin". (FYI I am 39 and there is no loose skin hanging off my body).

I am feeling crushed. It has made me realise that I cannot even remember the last time he complimented me. It is always little digs, little put downs.

Can you please tell me I have done great?

You look attractive and could pass for a sixth former. Your dh sounds rather unpleasant, sorry.

Holy scales OP - you have done amazingly. Not RTFT so I'll bet it's been said, but he is jealous. He's also probably a bit worried.

I'm on a 'weight-loss path' at the moment but have only managed about half of what's needed - 1.5 stone so far. If you are concerned about loose skin, you could try vitamins that help elasticity. I admit I've been taking collagen supplements to try and counteract any saggy skin that might ensue, but I am older than you. Another thing that helps with saggy skin is doing weights or resistance training. But only if you think you need to! You've done amazingly and he's just trying to take the edge off because he's ashamed of his own shortcomings.

Wow! What a transformation. That is awesome.

Your ‘D’H is obviously scared you’re going to disappear into the sunset with another man and tbh so he should be! Not because you’re more attractive but because you have the confidence to know you could do better than him, knobhead.

Wow just seen your before and after photos!! You look incredible! You go girl!

when I try to talk to him about me feelings, he waves his hands around saying "look at me, look at me! I'm a pwincess", then goes on a rant about spoilt, whiny "Western women"
Is he from a culture where women are subservient and expected to put up with anything without complaint?

I hope you also loose that dead weight hanging on to you - your husband.
You’ve, done amazing and look incredible! No compliments on weight loss aside, he sounds like a prick.
Lawyer up.

The biggest way to lose problem weight that is dragging you down is ditching the cunt of a husband. He sounds utterly vile.

You look amazing. Take your new body and your new confidence and live a life worth living!

You have done amazingly!!! You look great and must feel so good physically and mentally. I expect he's jealous. A couple of women were spiteful when I lost weight. Maybe he is resentful if you focussing on improving your health has taken your focus off him a bit? If so this is his problem BTW. Well done!

He sounds like a prize twat. I'd also like to know what he was like pre weight loss.

Did he like you bigger with low self esteem and now he's panicking thinking l you'll be off.
What's he mean 'Western Women' is his culture that women are to serve men?

You look fantastic well done, you should be proud of yourself. Now please do leave this awful man, he sounds vile.

That is absolutely amazing!!! You have done so well!! I'm totally jealous (also an 18-20 but have no willpower at all at the moment)

You look amazing and really healthy.

I don't have the words for your DH that are required...but I think you know yourself that this is not the response of a supportive and loving partner.

He's a prick.

You are absolutely stunning!

I am living in a parallel universe to you, hard earned weight loss, & no present at Xmas. General dismissive disinterested Tosser, takes everything for granted.
I told him to leave last week.

OMG you look bloody amazing and honestly you look like your in your early 20's.

Your Husband(there is nothing dear about him)is being a wanker,but being as you said he bought you no Christmas presents(what the fuck!)I'm guessing his disgusting behaviour is nothing new.

I'd be thinking about losing more weight if I was you in the form of the not so dear husband ,life is to short to be tied to someone who pulls you down to make them feel better about themselves,I learned that and left my first husband and I went onto find a very dear Husband and I couldn't be happier.

Just read your update. He actually sounds nasty. Hopefully your amazing weightloss (knowing you can be so focused and strong mentally) will help with your self confidence, and the knowledge that you don't need him and can have a better life with your children away from his pretty poisonous attitude.

You look absolutely fantastic OP and you should be proud of your hard work! Your DH sounds like an arse though.

Well done! You look fantastic!

Your legs are longer than I am tall!

You're a strong person - you now need to apply that to sorting the rest of your life out. Why are you still with a man who treats you so horribly?

He sounds absolutely horrible !

Well done to you op! That's a hell of a weight loss in a very short time. Keep up the good work!!

He is indeed from "another culture" (he is an Atheist, so it is not about religion).

He did not treat me better when I was bigger. He does not like curvier women. He used to mention "slim women" a lot when I was fatter. Obviously this has stopped now.

I am actually getting a bit angry now. I guess I have lots of thinking to do about the bigger picture, not this single nasty comment.

You've gone so well, I bet you look great and feel great. Be proud of yourself and enjoy how you look, as well as knowing you've probably helped your health long term. In a few months time it'll be spring/summer and hopefully you can enjoy some new summer clothes and feel great in them.

Your DH doesn't appreciate what he's got!

@FluffyBlueJumper

He is indeed from "another culture" (he is an Atheist, so it is not about religion).

He did not treat me better when I was bigger. He does not like curvier women. He used to mention "slim women" a lot when I was fatter. Obviously this has stopped now.

I am actually getting a bit angry now. I guess I have lots of thinking to do about the bigger picture, not this single nasty comment.

My husband is from a different culture... He is still not a dick to women🤷🏻

Get angry.

In 4 months, Wow!

well done you

Bloody hell op I can’t believe what you’ve done - as long as you are ok health wise from such quick weight loss.
As for you dh I honestly don’t know what to say other than can’t really believe such a lack of support and love from him. Does he hate that you’ve done this for some hidden psychological reason ? Jealousy/competitiveness/fear etc ?

@FluffyBlueJumper

Since mid-October I have lost a lot of weight (over 4 stone). I have gone from a size 18 to an 8-10. DH has not said a thing, so yesterday I playfully asked him to feel my back, because all the padding has gone. The only thing he said was "Ew, your skin has changed, it is like old lady's skin". (FYI I am 39 and there is no loose skin hanging off my body).

I am feeling crushed. It has made me realise that I cannot even remember the last time he complimented me. It is always little digs, little put downs.

Can you please tell me I have done great?

You lost 10 sizes over an incredibly short time your skin will be loose at least for a while.

I think there's some good collagen creams that can help it firm up but it will take time