To ask for a pat on the back RE weight loss - sad about DH's reaction

[FluffyBlueJumper]

Since mid-October I have lost a lot of weight (over 4 stone). I have gone from a size 18 to an 8-10.
DH has not said a thing, so yesterday I playfully asked him to feel my back, because all the padding has gone.
The only thing he said was "Ew, your skin has changed, it is like old lady's skin". (FYI I am 39 and there is no loose skin hanging off my body).

I am feeling crushed. It has made me realise that I cannot even remember the last time he complimented me. It is always little digs, little put downs.

Can you please tell me I have done great?

Well done OP, what a fantastic achievement!

Wow OP amazing.

I started Fast800 last week. Hoping I can do as well as you. Xxx

I'm sorry your DH is being so negative. Doesn't sound a helpful person to have in your life. X

You look fantastic!

Wouldn't look out of place on a catwalk imo.

That's really good - you must have WILL OF IRON! Are you also very tall? You look nice and tall :)

OP you have done brilliantly, and you look fabulous. Your husband is a knob and I reckon ditching him would be the easiest weight you’ve ever lost!

You look amazing. Well done on your achievement.

chatw00 I am 5'7" but I am wearing heels in the first picture.

Wowser, bloody well done.

But you do know you could lose another, say 12 stone, overnight by getting rid of your twat of a dh, don't you?

Ypu look brilliant. And that level of willpower is so impressive.

It might be time to have a bit of a think about how your partner speaks to you, about the impact that has on you and any DC and about whether theres any hope for change there or not

You do look just like Lana Del Ray!

You must feel (and look!) amazing. Such a shame your husband can't or won't acknowledge your phenomenal effort. Is it worth trying to talk to him about it?

That is absolutely bloody fantastic! You should be so proud of yourself. I've only lost 1 stone so far (2 to go) and my husband compliments me a few times a week on how well I'm doing. Your husband sounds like a dick. Keep going. You are doing amazing xx

I think he's insecure. I was with someone before who could be a bit like this - we both worked in fast food places when we were younger, when I got another job working in an office, after my interview he would say things like "you don't even know if you got it" and then when I did "your contract won't be made permanent" and then when it did he sulked and wouldn't engage in any conversation about my work.

You look amazing and have done so well!

Oh, hadn't seen the photos - you do look amazing! And much younger than your age.

Well done for your hard work and dedication OP. As someone who lost a large amount of weight then regained I would say it's so important to treat maintaining your loss as maybe even harder than losing the weight initially. Do have a sustainable long term plan and get some support, maybe from an online group. I find people irl don't like to talk about diets too much, so chatting to like-minded people is helpful.
About your husband it's very sad he has reacted this way. I feel like he is probably unkind and selfish in other ways, maybe even emotionally abusive. I think you need to look at the relationship and think about whether it's something that might be unhealthy. If you have dc together is he treating them well?

Amazing!!! That’s incredible weight loss.

Although I’m more impressed you had not even a sniff of carbs on Christmas Day. That’s some serious willpower!!!!

Your DH should be so proud of you. You look utterly fantastic - legs for daaaays!

You can do so much better than that nasty prick.

Fluffy this is so inspiring. I want to copy you! It sounds really hard. Well done!

I think your dh could be feeling threatened. Maybe he feels safe when you are overweight. You can't live with disrespect and contempt so hopefully if you talk to him he will be more sensitive in the future.

OP, you will have improved your health significantly.
I lost a large amount too. ExH and Mother both said: 'you look older'
Charming! But I didn't do it to impress them, I did it for ME (& my kids).
It's a real achievement. Dont let his sniping bring you down. xxx

Well done op. I’m amazed at the speed of your weight loss. I have also recently celebrated losing 4 stone but it took me 16 months! I did not diet over Christmas though. As others have said the challenge we face now is maintaining that loss...I started a thread on it recently and the main advice I got was to weigh myself regularly and make sure to have regular treats so there’s no temptation to go nuts.

You are gorgeous xxxx

OP I think you’re incredible

Can I just ask did you use YouTube programmes or have any tips? I’m starting from the same place size wise and can’t even stick to keto right now

How fast did the weight come off initially?

People aren’t going to recognise you are they!! Well done 👍

Well done! You really do look like Lana del ray!

Do you think he’s worried he’s next on the list to lose?

Brilliant work OP, you look great.

My now ex DP was exactly the same, I lost 9 stone over 2 years and he put me down at every opportunity - one of the many, many reasons he's now an ex. The irony was he was massively overweight too but he constantly judged everything I put in my mouth. Dick

Wow, you look amazing! Lovely and tall and slim with pretty hair. I think everyone is spot on your husband is insecure and worried other men will notice. The irony is that of course that you might indeed decide you are better off without him if he's such a prick. It sounds like he hasn't been 'on your side' for years. I don't know where you go with this other than to note it and over time you will know the right thing to do. You could even just directly say to him- I can't remember the last time you paid me a compliment, I like compliments, why has that stopped? See what he says.