AIBU - nationwide and their fucking spoken word poetry needs to fuck right off

[SimplyRadishing]

I was a good sport and calmly tolerated their gobshite "maybe the is best year of all" claptrappery nonsense in 2020...

I am now being subjected to yet more spoken word poetry and pointed hand gestures while wittering on about "Guineas shilling and crowns"

Fuck off nationwide
I just want to watch temptation island in peace and sing a long to the just eat jingle

🎤 Ta-cos to the chateaux yes please!

YABU- it's just your piss that's boiling. Spoken word poetry is refreshing and stunningly brave.

YANBU - Nationwide and their irritating ads are single handedly making lockdown at least 5% worse than it needs to be

YANBU - they are soooo bad. I wonder if they know how they are generally received and if they’ve done any research. No-one I know seems to like them! How can we make them stop

They are totally awful. I do wonder if that couple from the first one are married yet. How optimistic we all were...

It takes the piss. Especially as the modern day "building society" is nothing like the original one in the poem.

Thank you for this thread OP. I have to change channel when that ad comes on, because I can't bear the dreaded Special Talking.

Awful. I mute them when the come on. How have they not realised that everyone hates them?

YABU, the Just Eat ads are by far the most irritating thing on TV right now.

So so cringingly horrible. And on so many levels.

I did find the poetry advertisements a tad irritating as well, but since they stopped a big scam and saved us £3000 I'll let them off - I don't know if I would be drawn to them if I wasn't already with them though, based on those!

YANBU - they’re awful and need to stop

Yanbu

I'm glad I've not seen the one with the couple in the photo booth for a while...

"And you do..."

@Thewishingchair123

YANBU - they are soooo bad. I wonder if they know how they are generally received and if they’ve done any research. No-one I know seems to like them! How can we make them stop

If we get enough posts maybe a daily mail "journalist" can pick the story up and alert their readers and hopefully the UK marketing director at nationwide to the fact their business would be better off dumping several hundred thousand in a bin and setting it on fire rather than commissioning more of this audio visual torture.

Spoken word poetry can do one, generally.

While we’re at it, HSBC need to ease up on the lectures.

I’ve just had a thought - maybe the best way to highlight to them just how much they are disliked is to write an actual poem about them I’ve called mine STOP

STOP
Please put an end to your adverts
They are driving us insane
Just when we think they might have stopped
You put a new one out again
Life is bad enough in lock-down
But they’ve reached an all time low
They piss the nation off, just put a STOP
Then I might give Nationwide a go ...

Other poetry entrants welcome, form an orderly queue

I think they are trying to make bad but memorable adverts. They know how bad they are. Before the poetry they had a couple of unfunny sisters singing, one behind a keyboard. They were even worse.

I HATE those adverts! They are soooo wanky. I find it insulting that they think we might actually want to see that load of crap. I also mute or turn over immediately. I don't believe Nationwide are trying to be ironic. They are just being shit.

I have regularly yelled at the tv, "It's not fucking poetry. Just saying things in a slightly odd rhythm is not fucking poetry". They are dreadful.

Second only to Werther's Originals and the woman reminiscing about all her childhood trips to the caramel shop. The what? Has anyone ever seen a caramel shop? WTF is that?

They are awful. I hate them. However they are doing their job. People are talking about nationwide. No publicity is bad publicity and all that.

Oh my word I'm so glad you posted this.

The whining 😳

I have to mute the TV.

@SimplyRadishing
We could all save them tens of thousands!

Can't stand their ads tbh. Totally switch off. Used to work in the financial industry so unlikely to need their services.

My entry is called STFU
People in furlough, losing their jobs.
Please nationwide, don't try to be snobs.
Your poetry is lousy and lacks certain lustre.
And I've spent all the energy now I can muster.
How can we all be sitting round banking,
When the government's not better at covid than wanking?
So nationwide please shut the fuck up.
Stop all the poems.
You may have more luck.

It's not fucking poetry. Just saying things in a slightly odd rhythm is not fucking poetry". They are dreadful.
Yes- the "Special Talking: referred to by a PP. Ridiculously pretentiously wanky....but at the same so predictably samey. It's not the done thing to have lines rhyme and scan, half rhyming is the only acceptable thing now and that samey samey annoying cadence.

Spoken word poetry
Is a load of pish
With the sole exception
Of Hollie McNish.

A haiku for Nationwide

Kinder to our ears
Shagging foxes, angry cat
Torture us no more

YANBU. Those adverts absolutely stink, and wanky spoken word poet is crap. All of it - including that total shite by Amanda Gorman at Biden's inauguration. Talk about the emperor's new poem.