AIBU - nationwide and their fucking spoken word poetry needs to fuck right off

[SimplyRadishing]

I was a good sport and calmly tolerated their gobshite "maybe the is best year of all" claptrappery nonsense in 2020...

I am now being subjected to yet more spoken word poetry and pointed hand gestures while wittering on about "Guineas shilling and crowns"

Fuck off nationwide
I just want to watch temptation island in peace and sing a long to the just eat jingle

🎤 Ta-cos to the chateaux yes please!

YABU- it's just your piss that's boiling. Spoken word poetry is refreshing and stunningly brave.

YANBU - Nationwide and their irritating ads are single handedly making lockdown at least 5% worse than it needs to be

Oops, I quite like that one

First time we've seen them tonight, but both DH and I thought they were pretty awful.

@StillCoughingandLaughing

It’s not just Nationwide anymore. Dozens of companies are turning their ads into wanky little poems. Half the time they don’t even scan. That bloody Phillips shaver ad about how ‘If nanotech blades cut with precision, then a close shave is today’s decision’ makes me want to retch. ‘If I ever find out who thought up this crock, I’ll hunt him down and kick him in the cock’.

Even the low cost funeral ads are doing it now. ‘We’ve spoken to dad and he wants cheap and quick; We’ll keep the cash and chuck him in a skip’.

Was just crying with laughter reading this...

The poems people are writing here are so cringey although some are quite good (the ones I managed to read, I just scroll quickly past because they set my teeth on edge).

Snoop's rap made me laugh - just couldn't believe Justeat decided to use 'Uncle Snoop' but hey, they're all smiling to the bank I suppose.

I'm not a fan of spoken word but I liked the one by "Amanda whaserface" (Gorman) mainly because it was unexpected. They said poem and I realised later it was of the spoken word type. I wouldn't have gone looking for it, otherwise.

It’s fucking awful, it makes me want to move my mortgage!

@MargotMoon

YANBU Snoop going, "Tacos to the chateau" is the best ad on telly for years

100%, love the just eat snoop dog ads!

My man Hank flies by with my fried rice, riiight.

Snoop rules.

I never tire of the Just Eat ad with Snoop! Love it so. Nationwide... This thread has made me laugh, thanks.

Yabu. I rarely watch tv but the ones I've seen have been good.

I absoluly hate that Nationwide poem.
Dd now alerts me to it if I'm not paying attention to TV, just to annoy me more.

For some reason it makes me feel ill

Not sure if it’s the tone or the rhythm but it really gets to me

I’m sorry if this has been mentioned but this particular one PISSES ME OFF.

A woman is standing in her garden saying ‘ooh it’s wonderful I heard a cuckoo for the first time. Hear that? Cuckoo, cuckoo!’ She exclaims. ‘I’ve never heard a cuckoo!’

WELL YOU STILL HAVEN’T IT IS A FUCKING CHIFFCHAFF CALL IT SOUNDS NOTHING LIKE A BASTARDISED CUCKOO.

@MargotMoon

YANBU Snoop going, "Tacos to the chateau" is the best ad on telly for years

Bloody genius line, that one. We love it!

Gruesome

Iznot poetry

Just bland people

talk

ing nonsense

with

terrible punctuation

...

The current one wittering on about coffee shops, just to remind us of another thing that we can’t do!

@SimplyRadishing

I was a good sport and calmly tolerated their gobshite "maybe the is best year of all" claptrappery nonsense in 2020...

I am now being subjected to yet more spoken word poetry and pointed hand gestures while wittering on about "Guineas shilling and crowns"

Fuck off nationwide
I just want to watch temptation island in peace and sing a long to the just eat jingle

🎤 Ta-cos to the chateaux yes please!

YABU- it's just your piss that's boiling. Spoken word poetry is refreshing and stunningly brave.

YANBU - Nationwide and their irritating ads are single handedly making lockdown at least 5% worse than it needs to be

I don't know if it's the poetry that's bad or the speaking of it or both, but I bloody hate it.

Thank you for saying what I've been thinking

@EveryDayIsADuvetDay

So don't watch commercial TV? I can't stand the ad breaks, so only watch BBC or amazon prime.

Has it's disadvantages, I'm really really keen to watch "It's a Sin"

I do generally like spoken word poetry - not entirely certain whether I'd like poetry in praise of Nationwide.

I'm not going to miss good programmes because of shit adverts.

Though I am pleased when I can fast forward past them

@DaylightSunlight

The poems people are writing here are so cringey although some are quite good (the ones I managed to read, I just scroll quickly past because they set my teeth on edge).

Snoop's rap made me laugh - just couldn't believe Justeat decided to use 'Uncle Snoop' but hey, they're all smiling to the bank I suppose.

I'm not a fan of spoken word but I liked the one by "Amanda whaserface" (Gorman) mainly because it was unexpected. They said poem and I realised later it was of the spoken word type. I wouldn't have gone looking for it, otherwise.

That’s the point though. Poems are cringey and we can all write shit ones.

@BluePeterVag 😀

Another cringeworthy offering for you @DaylightSunlight

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Dear Nationwide
Your adverts are poo

Oh no!!!🥴😀

@MrJollyLivesNextDoor

Will it be mushrooms...

Fried onion rings? We’ll have to wait and see....

This is the patronising Scottish government corona virus one:

"F reminds us to cover our faces.
A means avoiding all crowded places.
C is for cleaning, again and again.
T's the two metre distance we need to maintain.
S is self-isolate, if we think that we've caught it.
Remember FACTS and together we'll stop it."

They've got another one, about not wasting water, but I can't find that one for your delectation and delight.

I just have to wonder why the Scottish government thinks its people will only listen to public health advice or other advice, if given through the medium of twee poetry?

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius That poem looks like the sort of thing they would put on a poster and stick on the wall in primary school toilets.