Love my house but neighbours are watching us

[Isitevapornot]

Moved into my house two years ago, we’re renting, late twenties. Love our house, it’s perfect for us — if we could afford to we would buy it. The only problem is with one set of neighbours. We get on well with one side, but the other just watches us. If we are in the garden they will mutter under their breath and huff, so we don’t go in the garden anymore. If I’m putting the bins out they stand and stare at the window. Every time we return home from the shops, they watch us through the curtains and hide whenever we see them.

It makes me really uncomfortable and I’m not sure what to do about it - I’m worried speaking to them about it would make it worse!

Would you move?

YABU - No

YANBU - Yes

Buy a taller fence...problem solved.

We love our house and then a pair of old knobheads moved in next door. They are an absolute pain in the arse. They moan about everything and anything. Sometimes though I think it’s better the devil you know. We wouldn’t move because of the risk of ending up with even worse neighbours.

Mumsnet is horrible atm

Although I think commonly accepted now the word may have originally been coined from Chavi it has evolved as language does to describe the Council Housed And Violent, ASBO proud, Lonsdale wearing characters popularised by Little Britain, Ali G etc. Similarly like the word Jock its all about how it is directed and received.

Languages are full of loan words. Its estimated that English is comprised of at least 20% of its words originating from Old Norse and the Vikings, who invaded large parts of England. Its going to be a disaster for the English language if some Danes or Norwegians object to us using words like troll. "Viking" itself as a noun is really racist, because it was originally an adjective, to "go viking" and not an insult. Even the words "anger" "ransack", "scold" and "beserk" originate from Old Norse. Even worse, modern Icelandic still contains many of these words, so that they are directly racist towards Icelanders.

"Heathen" is possibly the best example of this as the Norse used it to refer to a sort of backwoods person who lived on poor, uncultivated moorland, who was lacking in education and finesse. Equivalent to the word "chav" which we now are told that we must not use.

There are probably far more recent examples from Norman French.

I'd this really happening, or are you just paranoid and making something out of nothing? I ask because you sound like my neighbour. She's diagnosed schizophrenic and extremely paranoid. Even me putting rubbish in my recycle bin means she accuses me of watching her. God forbid I dare to clean my windows 😂

Invest in some headphones... Let them know you aren't listening to them. Once they know they are being ignored they will stop..
But they aren't REALLY doing anything are they?

I wouldn't let it bother you. Who cares if they mutter while you go out in your garden? Why let their 'muttering' control your life?

I have a family next door who have kids around the age of mine and never say hello. I said good morning once when we were both leaving our houses two feet from each other and they just looked at me and said nothing.

In the end as long as they keep to themselves who cares.

They sound absolutely horrible. Have you spoken to any other neighbours nearby OP? If you did and found that they are hideous to everyone that might make you feel a bit better - its totally them who have the problem!!

Re the garden, doesnt matter now when the weather is crap but what about on a beautiful spring day when you want to drink your cup of tea outside in the sun? Why on earth should these horrid bullies stop you doing that? How high is the fence? Can you increase it by adding trellis? You might need to ask the landlord’s permission but it would be totally worth it for a bit of privacy.

It does sound like they are doing nothing wrong, everyone’s allowed to look out their window whenever they like? Just ignore them and get on with what your doing.

@seepingweeping

Big wave, flash a nip by accident and they will stop watching

Not quite this, but I would wave and make sure they knew that I knew they were watching...

I might even make a sign with "Feck off, you nosey b'stards!" on it.

We have deeply unpleasant neighbours who do this, but worse stuff too. But unless they actually attack you, throw rubbish into your garden, etc, I don't think it's worth moving house for. Just try to rise above. Ignore them - they're not worth paying attention to. They're probably doing it in an attempt to intimidate. Our neighbour is a bully, and he watches us with a really nasty smirk on his face - deliberate intimidation.

Don't stop using your garden = that has probably been their aim.

And try not to take it too personally. Our neighbours hated the people who sold the house to us too.

What? You would consider moving because you happen to live next door to two miserable bastards? Screw that! What about if your next neighbours aren't nice...do you keep moving? Just ignore them and get on with your life. Let them tie themselves in knots if they want to; just continue to use your garden and don't them affect you.

Ignore them and just get on with your life.

@Isitevapornot

They’ll mutter ‘for f*cks sake’ when we go out there. Sorry, there’s not much to give apart from what I’ve explained. They’re intimidating in a way that I am quite quiet and anxious so it puts me on edge

That would be enough for me to move OP.

I lived next door to arsehole neighbours for 15 years. The only time they spoke to me was to complain about my cats (two cats, not a flock and not the only cats in the neighbourhood, there were about ten). They put a lot of energy into ignoring me pointedly at the bus stop, the shop, anywhere they saw me. I just let them get on with it. They moved out in the end.

Say it loudly back when you are sat relaxing in your garden and notice them.

@Isitevapornot

They’ll mutter ‘for f*cks sake’ when we go out there. Sorry, there’s not much to give apart from what I’ve explained. They’re intimidating in a way that I am quite quiet and anxious so it puts me on edge

Mutter back "what's your fucking problem?"

YANBU, I'd move personally.

Im not sure, I might. I feel like that sometimes with my neighbours too but mostly manage to ignore

I would say a big smile and maybe an occasional cheery wave!

Do not feel compelled to move because of them especially as it sounds like you love the place!

I would start using your garden again

Also, what if you do move and you next neighbours are just as miserable arseholes?!