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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be offended by this joke?

193 replies

Fruityherbaltea · 30/01/2021 10:42

My baby is 6 months old. I visited family recently and a family member fed him a bottle in my presence.

My baby was moving a lot so the family member said: "You have to hold still, otherwise I will stick in the bottle the wrong end" while grinning.

I was quite offended by this joke and thought it was inappropriate. Am I justified being offended or am I being precious?

OP posts:
butterpuffed · 31/01/2021 17:58

RTFT, OP is being precious.

If there was a job going for the professionally offended, many MNers would be rushing to fill it.

IwantToDatePicard · 31/01/2021 18:06

Whilst the joke isn't funny I think you are being a bit OTT about it.

LizFlowers · 31/01/2021 18:07

It was only a joke, for goodness sake.

ViciousJackdaw · 31/01/2021 20:13

@smoothchange

He wasn't threatening or joking about sexually abusing a baby!

He was joking about exactly that. Putting the bottle in the 'wrong' end. What do you think that meant?

Oh for fucks sake...

How, in the name of all that is holy, have you read baby was moving a lot so the family member said: "You have to hold still, otherwise I will stick in the bottle the wrong end" and turned it into a threat or joke about sexual abuse?

All they meant was that the bottle might end up in the wrong place due to wriggling baby. He wasn't declaring himself the second coming of Jimmy Savile and offering to fix it now was he!

smoothchange · 31/01/2021 20:44

Just to clarify, at no point I suggested anybody was making a threat.

It's interesting how you mention him hardly declaring himself the second coming of Jimmy Saville though, is that what it takes for jokes about abuse to be deemed inappropriate by you?

I did t say this man was a threat. I didn't say anything like that. You have to be some level of sick to make (or accept) a joke about placing a bottle in the wrong end of a baby though.

Lemmeout · 31/01/2021 20:47

I don’t think you are being precious. Your baby is your new world. It wasn’t funny. Some people “think” they are hilarious.

Lemmeout · 31/01/2021 20:48

I’ve not read the replies because The connotation is creepy and I hate this type of talk so I can see why this is on your mind.

nicky7654 · 31/01/2021 20:51

Are you normally so offended? Life can be miserable when you can't enjoy a joke and see wrong in everything!!! You may need to watch a comedy!

Beyondfedupnow · 31/01/2021 20:57

The joke wasn’t funny but nothing to get offended over, why is everybody so offended about everything these days. I wouldn’t have given it a second thought.
Try having a baby born with Down Syndrome and see what sort of comments you get then, I can guarantee they are something to be offended about.

FrostyChocolateMilkshake · 31/01/2021 22:10

Very precious OP!

Indecisive12 · 31/01/2021 22:18

People read the full thread, I think it was page 2 where OP disclosed sexual abuse from this same person. Massive drip feed yes but OP is not being precious with that information.

Mittens030869 · 31/01/2021 22:43

To defend the OP re the 'drip feed', it's really hard to share such information, especially if there's still a relationship with the person concerned. (As she has in fact confirmed.). I suspect the she simply wasn't comfortable about sharing those details, hence her not including it in her original post. She obviously realised that without it, her upset about the 'joke' did sound precious.

And no one said that her dad was threatening to abuse her DS, he wasn't. But it's a very weird joke to come out with, especially as the baby was presumably dressed, or at the very least wearing a nappy! So how would it be possible for him to stick the bottle into the 'other end' by accident? And why would the 'other end' even cross his mind to think of never mind say?

For me, sorry, I agree with the OP that the 'joke' was inappropriate, particularly with the backstory. If that makes me 'precious', so be it. I will admit that I'm viewing it through the lens of being an SA survivor, and at the hands of my F, so I can be overly triggered sometimes, but there are a lot of people who will similarly he triggered and for similar reasons.

At the very least the OP's dad was grossly insensitive under the circumstances and must have known that his daughter wouldn't appreciate his 'joke'.

Sceptre86 · 31/01/2021 22:52

It wasn't funny and I would not leave my baby alone with him. What do you get put of your relationship with your dad? If nothing positive, go no contact.

LizFlowers · 31/01/2021 22:53

@Indecisive12

People read the full thread, I think it was page 2 where OP disclosed sexual abuse from this same person. Massive drip feed yes but OP is not being precious with that information.
Oh blimey! That's awful and puts a different complexion on the whole scenario.
pumpkinbump · 31/01/2021 22:54

Depends who's saying it. Doting MIL fine, pervy uncle Peter from down the road? NO

Whichname98 · 31/01/2021 23:14

@daisypond, yup.

pumpkinbump · 31/01/2021 23:15

Sorry just read the rest, no, not at all.

Griselda1 · 31/01/2021 23:49

Weird joke and that's putting it mildly. My babies were breast fed and it's reminded me how much trust is involved in the act of someone feeding your baby.

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